From what I see on here and have seen on other forums, it seems that many people have a commodified view on dating, where they treat their dates like commodities rather than people, trying to get the objective best they can and thinking of dating as a "market".
As a result, it seems like quite a few people don't even really care about their partners and are willing to break up over the most trivial reasons imaginable or the first time their partner does something they consider to be less than attractive.
I agree that attraction is important but still, it's an interpersonal relationship, and yet it seems like some people aren't even as caring as they would be to a friend, to a date. It's as if dating looks to be more of a game and competion, rather than just a natural process to find someone subjectively compatible.
People don't play such games or have a commodified viewpoint when looking for friends (most of the time), so why do many do it with dating so much?
Most Helpful Girl
I think people treat other people like commodities in general. Even people they consider friends. Society has changed a lot in the past few decades and people are no longer as connected to what is important anymore. Instead it's mostly about money or getting something out of people.
I know a lot of people are focussed on what someone can do for them. I know it's nice to be well connected, but that shouldn't be the only reason they are friends with a person. It's good to have people who will support you.
There are still decent people out there, it's just gotten harder to find because people manipulate and put on a fake mask to hide the real reasons they are around a person.
It's unfortunate, but from what I have heard from some of my friends, they don't treat their partners well. Some of them say mean things. I get sometimes partners can be frustrating and sometimes it's venting. But when they are ordering around their partner or belittling them in front of other people, I can't help but feel sorry for them.1
Most Helpful Guy
It's weird hey. If I see anyone, my friendliness makes it that I buy the first round, I like nice up market places, take my friends out, compliment all my friends (girls and guys), help the out etc. as soon as I like a girl or I see she may like me, my entire thinking changes. I don't buy her a drink, always go to a neutral spot (like common coffee shop to meet), don't compliment her much, play mind games etc. like I have been busy and I apologised to a new friend and my band mates about my lack of presence with them. I never apologise to the girls I'm flirting with. It's warped but the moment I feel I give to a girl, I become a "nice guy" and am so scared of it.2