Why is it so easy to be a woman in the dating scene?

Seriously its so easy, I am really actually jealous. All you have to do is do your hair, wear some makeup and look good and guys will come up to you, if your attractive its even easier, and in both situations the women call all the shots. If the girl doesn't like the guys looks, they shut him down, if he doesn't seem confident enough shut him down, if he comes off too strong shut him down. There is no risk involved, women dont have to walk up and risk rejection, they dont have to pretend to be confident to get with some guy, they dont have to initiate anything in the relationship, they just sit there and let the guy do it all. In online dating women literally never have to send a single message, on tinder they just swipe a few good looking guys and have a bunch of messages from guys that they can then choose from. For us guys we never get messaged on tinder (I saw a figure that said 80 percent of conversations are started by men), we become just one of 10+ messages in a girls inbox, and the girl can just choose who she wants, thats so easy, she doesn't have to fire off 20 messages just to get a conversation with a guy, she just looks in her inbox and chooses the best one. Girls literally dont need to do anything but look good, and be able to hold a conversation. Guys have easy to understand standards: hot=good. Girls have such complicated standards that its hard for men. We have to be confident, but not cocky, funny but sometimes serious, we have to be willing to risk rejection, be able to take hits on our egos everytime we get shut down, we have to look good but can't spend too much time on our appearance because women prefer "personality" which is a vague thing that no one knows how to improve, its easy to be a woman. Just look hot, and hold a conversation and you get men. So freaking easy, dont need to risk rejection, dont have to do anything. Why do they have it so easy?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Why is it so easy to be a woman in the dating scene?
    Likely because you have a skewed perception of what dating is like for gals. You appear to be overlooking that most gals options compromise of the guys that approach them. Gals sift through to find a desirable option while all of the guys options are desirable because they are what he wanted.

    Also it seems gals want partners aka people while guys want sexual objects to bust a nut in or on. It seems much easier to be an object than a person.

    "Girls have such complicated standards that its hard for men"
    I agree the standards gals have are hard for guys because gals actually care about the guy being a worthwhile human being rather than just his looks. Having to be a decent appealing person seems to be quite complicated for many guys.

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    • Agree in general, but can't one of those problems be a moot if the girls start approaching too so now all of her options are desirable too?

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    • I will agree with you on that one, in polls I have seen the numbers are really weird. In one the largest number of guys (something like 65%) had never been asked out by girls. Around 10% had been asked out once, and then almost no guys had been asked out between 3 and 6 times, but then more then 6 times the number of guys spiked to almost 25% of respondents, so that means 25% of guys are being asked out by girls, thats pretty crazy. It seems like average looking women will still get asked out, but for guys unless you are a model, or super awesome it just doesn't happen. According to the poll, 65% of guys have it extremely hard with women, while women have the luxury of being asked out much more.

    • "According to the poll, 65% of guys have it extremely hard with women,"
      No according to the poll 65% of guys have never been asked out by gals. You are projecting that they have it extremely hard. I know many guys that aren't't asked out by gals but have no to little difficulties with gals.

      "while women have the luxury of being asked out much more."
      No according to the poll gals are asked out more. You are projecting it is a luxury. Quantity does not equate to quality. It is a toss up if this is a luxury as it could be most of the guys are undesirable. To me it would be like someone calling it a luxury that a hetero guy gets asked out by only bisexual and homosexual guys.

Most Helpful Guy

  • This is the way nature has intended it. Men are hunter-gatherers while women are selectors. Only the very best of the alpha males (such as myself) succee. This is to ensure reproductive fitness: we cannot have weakling beta males too scared to pursue the hunt spreading their faulty genes. This would be terrible for social evolution.

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    • I would have assumed women would have moved away from animalistic tendencies a long time ago, after all its been 5,000 plus years since Western Civilization was living the hunter gatherer lifestyle. None of these women alive today were born into that lifestyle, so it would seem like they would look past the way the guy acts and look a little more at what type of a person he is. Apparently not, they all still go for the same type of guy; and ironically enough that type of guy isn't usually the best looking guy in the room, or the richest guy in the room even though you would think those would be the guys they would go for based on evolutionary tendencies.

    • No genes are very much ingrained in all of us and now more than ever, we need alpha male politicians and business leaders. It is the only solution for the current state of global affairs. We need women to be MORE selective. This is why a polygynous libertarian political order would be of such great benefit.

What Girls Said 7

  • It is not as easy as you try and make it out to be. First of all guys call off all the time if they don't like the looks, there is nothing wrong with not dating someone you are not attracted too. Secondly it's how society has trained us to be. "Don't ask the guy, you will seem too pushy." or "Let them come to you, or you will look desperate." Those things are put upon us, as like it is put upon guys that they are suppose to be the ones to ask girls out. It's not like we don't want to, we do. But we are afraid we will look pushy or desperate. Also every girl has different standards. What is so bad about having standards or a preference. You say that guys just want someone who looks nice, that is a standard. Plus guys have standards too, not just about looks but personality. It isn't just us who have it, so why act like we are the bad guys because we won't date anything that looks good. You could do it too, and nobody would blame you because it is natural, it is just what you do.

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    • The stigma for girls pursuing seems to have mostly died down now and society as a whole now seems to accept girls approaching and asking out.

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    • www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1712700-would-you-like-it-if-a-girl-asked-you-out

      Not a massive sample size, but its still 12 guys, and of those 12 guys only 1 was opposed to women asking him out. So where is this society thing coming into play? Every guy I've talked to wants women to ask him out, so guys certainly aren't the ones campaigning against it. And why would you care if you look desperate, I personally like desperate, it shows that the girl is really into you. I think these are just excuses, as the woman you have the power to wait until a guy comes up to you, then you act as you normally would (not masking your emotions to seem less desperate) and then if he likes that great, if he doesn't he leaves and you didn't risk anything because you were just yourself. Goes back to my point, its a low risk situation, you just keep waiting for guys to come along until one keeps initiating conversations with you even after he sees that you are "desperate"

    • Girls are the ones who tell girls they will look desperate. My mom taught me that guys should ask me out not the other way around. I know it is bull, but for awhile I didn't because hey it's my mom why would she lie. It was just what she was taught. A lot of girls don't tend to ask guys because we don't want to seem crazy, but a lot of the time it is just what we are taught.

  • that is not true, I disagree it's also not very hard to please a girl just don't be a jackass and respect her and be honest. MANY times girls DO make the first move, MANY girls DO text first and risking rejection? omg we risk rejection too many times HOLY. guys just lead us on and when we're not good enough anymore they drop us. overall I mean that you can't say a girls roles easier and I'm not saying a guys role is easier either. both of you have to make it work but a girls role is not as easy as you think it is.

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    • I would link a poll here but you can do it yourself or look it up. There are plenty of polls out there about how often guys are asked out. What you will find is that roughly 25% of guys have been asked out multiple times by girls, while 75% have been asked out one time or less by a woman, it is not common at all for women to ask men out so I dont know what your talking about, AND these statistics were skewed because the poll I did, some guys counted a girl "hinting" as asking them out, so actually getting asked out would probably be less. And the girls role is definitely easier. In a separate poll I did 91% of women had been asked out multiple times, 91%! with those odds girls never have to ask men out in their lives. Men on the other hand, if you dont ask a girl out, unless your in that 25% of hot, funny, or rich guys you aren't ever getting asked out so you will stay single your whole life. Women dont have that problem, cause 85% of them had been asked out

    • I don't really believe any of that. Like don't get me wrong I do think girls have it harder than the question made it out to be, but I still think men have it much harder than women. I actually hope it is something that equality eventually fixes. I mean I'm a guy and I have never been asked out by a girl before, I've barely ever been hit on a girl before. Every girl who I've ever gone out with I have actively had to seek them out and ask them out. If a girl is shy and passive it is still likely she with end up in a relationship, I know women just like this. If you are a shy, passive male and don't seek out a girl, he will be forever alone. And girls also lead guys on and drop them when they get bored too, it's not just guys.

  • Haha yep and once you guys "have us" you play soccer with our emotions. It is even trust me!

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  • Not all women are lucky. Some are not!!! I have good looking and really people ask me out. They keep staring at me but very occasionally people take me for a date. And when they do they treated me like shit!! So it's all about luck for guys or girls!! Some people they have luck and others don't

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  • There are hard moments for women too.

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  • No we don't I am shy so I have a hard time talking to guy's my check's turn pink and I just smile

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  • Look good. Cause that's easy if you have ugly and fat genes in your blood.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Read the girls' questions and insecurities hrre and you'll be less jealous.

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