I'm pretty sure I got ghosted... What do you think?

Been dating this guy for about 10 months now. He lives 45 minutes away and i see him at least 3-4 times a month. Everything seemed to be good and I thought it was heading into a relationship. I've meet his friends, he's meet mine, I've meet his mom and he's meet mine too. Now all of a sudden when I ask him if he's free to hang out next week, I haven't gotten a response. Its been a couple days now since I've hit him up and I don't know what I did. I just feel lost and I feel like I've been wasting my time with him when I could've been dating other people. I really like him a lot and haven't felt this way towards someone since my ex. I really thought we had something and funny thing is I was going to ask him if he wanted to move things forward and be together when I saw him next. I guess the only question is if I'm over thinking it cause he hasn't responded or if I should just let it go and move on?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Let it go and move on. A guy who's truly seriously interested in you won't have you feeling like this.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Thats a clear sign that your not his prority... id slowly start to detach from him... dont trust him at all

    Your moving to quickly

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    • I don't get how I'm moving too quickly when we've been dating for 10 months now. I haven't brought up anything about being official and agreed to take it slow in the very beginning. I know guys move slower in relationships and I respect that but I feel like its time to see where its going. Not trying to be rude I just want to understand more of what you're saying.

    • Right. I didn't actually read your story.. I did now though

      I kinda see whats going on here - first it could easily be nothing BUT in case it is something

      For 10 months 3-4 times a week seems likes its been casual this whole time. Im surprised you guys didn't talk about moving it along much sooner. Like at least at the 4-6 month mark.

      The thing is - there really isn't many legit reasons for him to ignore you - abnormal issues are not common so the most logical assumption is he's giving you the cold shoulder

    • That's why I'm wondering if I'm over analyzing it cause he works a lot and may have forgotten to text back or something. I'm just very insecure from my previous relationship which gives me thoughts that he may just be over it, giving me the cold sholder and not wanting to confront the issue. I know he's scared to get back into a relationship because of his previous relationship as am I, that's why I took to very slow for him and for myself. I'm trying to respect his boundaries by not coming off as clingy and giving him some time to text back but that also gives me those obscure thoughts. If I were to try to reach him again would I seem to come off as clingy or desperate?

What Girls Said 2

  • How about: call him? Maybe he saw the message and just forgot to respond. The world isn't over yet, you haven't exactly done everything in your power to get ahold of him. Just because he doesn't respond to ONE message once it doesn't mean you just witnessed 10 months go down the drain. No need to be so dramatic. Try again.

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    • I'm trying not to over think things but I do have major anxiety and my past relationship kinda fucked me up and left me with insecurities. I'm thinking he just got busy with work and forgot like you said but then again I have a little voice in the back of my mind saying just leave and say fuck it. I would call or text again but I don't want to make him feel pressured to talk to me when he doesn't want too.

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    • No worries, if you have any more questions just ask. :) If you follow my suggestions (calling him now, texting him once if he doesn't pick up + calling him in a few days one last time) it should be pretty easy for you to figure out if he has dropped you or not. It's much more likely that he just forgot to respond, though.
      I know how much it sucks to have that voice of doubt in your head, I get it sometimes too. But always try to focus on the most rational and logical thoughts you have. Not answering once is ok, everyone is human and everyone forgets sometimes. But ignoring you when you've done numerous attempts to reach out, that's a red flag.

    • I definitely will do what you suggested and see what happens tomorrow. Thanks again! ✌

  • Maybe try sending him another message and see if he responds. If he doesn't I would suggest moving on.

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