Guys, what do you make of this very confusing guy?

I don't understand this guy at all. He's a friend of a friend whom I met one night when we went partying and danced really closely. He had a toy medieval sword with which he would annoy me smacking me, at some point he went too far and I slapped him and we went back to dancing a bit and drinking. We had a bit of a game where I would try to take it away. After, we all went for breakfast and he and I went to my place. We slept next to each other, nothing happened. When he woke up, he proceeded to annoy me by taking the covers, pillows, ... and holding me really tight and tickling me. I asked him why he did it and he answered 'because i can'. We drank coffee and talked a little, he managed to insult me every now and then to get a rise out of me, but mostly just lounged on the bed until he got bored and started annoying me again. At the end we ended up having takeaway indian food and he left to go home. I've broken my head over this, why did he stick around and keep annoying me all day? Was that just him having a laugh? Will I see this guy again? Note: we are both in our twenties so it's not a 'your typical 12 year old' sort of thing

OK, there's been an update since this post and he is still totally confusing. He left something at my place so I texted him to come get it. He came over and brought drinks (my request) and the same thing happened again, only he didn't get quite as annoying. He's definitely attracted to me because I kissed him and he responded very decisively. I pulled back from that though, and now we are back to the start. Help?


Most Helpful Guy

  • No, he is behaving in the only way he knows how when he interacts with a girl that he really likes... by annoying the shit out of her, but also trying to charm her at the same time.
    I would suggest (seeing as you seem so comfortable around him) telling him to stop being so immature and just come out with it because you want him to, and because you feel the same way about him. Tell him that, while his attention is appreciated and enjoyed, the way he shows you that attention is not appreciated.
    Just be mature and honest about this; sit yourselves down, over a meal or something, and discuss the relationship between the two of you, the possible relationship, the behaviour and it feels disrepectful. Doing this will lay the ground work for an open and healthy relationship with strong communication at it's core (and no, I don't mean that kind of open relationship...), which will benefit you both greatly in the short and long term.
    Good luck, I hope i've helped.

    • I am comfortable around him but I'm not willing to ask directly. Also, I don't actually want a relationship necessarily and I definitely don't want to show my cards first. This may sound really immature but I don't want to have that kind of talk with him because I would be incredibly embarrassed and I don't really know how I feel about him. He intrigues me, but that might stop once he explains his behaviour fully. And I know for certain that telling him anything of the kind will upset whatever power balance we have now and that scares me. It's already shifted a bit, in the sense that he's less annoying but more critical now and we have gotten more comfortable around each other physically. With which I mean we watched netflix and had pizza and cuddled more.

What Guys Said 3

  • I think this is totally stupid and immature as well. I don't understand what does he want and what does he get by doing all this.

    • Exactly. But you're just repeating my frustrations :)

  • Sounds like he likes you but is playing aloof to get you more interested. Or he may not be attracted to you at all.

    • I updated the question, he's definitely attracted. I'm not sure but I think he does want to see me, because he does come over and stay for a really long time. The thing is though, I'm naturally quite 'laissez-faire' so he might be reacting to my attitude. I really don't understand this guy.

    • He needs to man up. You made your move. The ball is now in his court. He is probably inexperienced or has been burned in the past so he is being careful.

  • he sounds like he just doesn't give a shit about life lol