Who benefits from the fact that no one dates in college anymore?

I feel like young people today are probably more socially stilted than previous generations because so few people actually date. Everything is about hookups and fwbs.

I go to a small college, and it seems that very few people on campus date anymore. Our college used to host a formal every spring. Last year it was canceled because there were so few people who bought tickets. It used to be one of the big social events at my school, and there was a lot of talk about why no one wanted to go. The reality is that there just aren't many couples on campus anymore, not like there were even 20 years ago. There was some talk about this trend, but mostly students were just don't seem to care.

Of the friends in my social group, only two are in relationships. Both of them are girls who date guys outside of our college. Of the remaining 10 guys and girls, most only have hookups people they might admire from afar but don't engage with for some reason or another. No one really goes on dates or seems to want serious relationships. The girls, it seems, only want the very top guys, guys who are mostly unavailable to them. The guys seem more realistic but too timid to make anything happen. I wonder what's going to happen to us once we leave college where it's so much harder to meet people than it is in college. So who actually benefits from this social setup?


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What Girls Said 1

  • I didn't get involved in a serious relationship in college because I had been in a relationship for all of high school and I was there to study and get good grades. I broke up with my high school boyfriend my first semester and it was horrible I couldn't study. So benefits are better grades and focus. Plus the person you are in college is not the person you will be in ten years. People that don't go to college and marry there high school sweethearts have a better chance because they have a different mind set. They take a well paying trade job and raise kids. They stay mostly the same.

    By college is this weird time between adolescence and adulthood where you aren't focused on working and free to espouse whatever you want. Once responsibility enter back into your life you change.

    So date but not seriously. The only time I've seen people marry someone from college and it work is when they are a one income household.

    College is about finding out who you are and you can't do that in a serious relationship.

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    • "By college is this weird time between adolescence and adulthood where you aren't focused on working and free to espouse whatever you want. Once responsibility enter back into your life you change."

      I've always worked in college, and college feels like *nothing but* responsibility to me. I started working in a campus lab 20 hours a week as a freshman and haven't stopped since, so I haven't had some charmed existence free of work or alarm clocks.

      See, I'm not really like you, I don't feel any real need to 'find myself' as so many people do. I'm me, and I'm pretty happy with who I am. I actually feel sorry for some of these people because they seem so lost, like they don't have a solid identity. Either way, I don't admire my generation. I think that compared to previous generations, we're all a bunch of children. People in the past had children and had been to war by the time they were my age.

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    • Hey you patronizing asshole, I'm not your son, so don't go copping some attitude of superiority just because you were born before me.

    • I meant it as a joke since that is how you see people older than you. We were all there once. 😉

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