Help? I m in trouble? please help me out?

I need advice please read;

I m 23 and clearly feeling helpless. I live at home with my mother and sister (who is severly depressed and suffers from some kind of disorder) She literally put so much thoughts in my head of our hometown is boring, no people, nothing to do, just plain negative thoughts. Because of that i really started to believe that my life is hopeless and i became depressed with her.

My older bro and young sis moved out at 18 and aren't on speaking terms with me anymore, my bro thinks i should move out and get a place in my hometown. I feel discouraged to do so because i feel like my life is hopeless here and im not happy.

I have two options either move out at a place in my hometown while in debt by the way and start off small, or move out to another big city alone, no family no friends... or stay at home for a little while even tho it isn't a healthy enviroment?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Wherever you go is where you are !
    People place and things cannot make a person happy or depressed.
    All of the happiness is to be had right in the same seat you are sitting in.
    If you want more stress and pain then continue to place values on the environment surrounding you whether it's people in your life or places to stay or go to.

    Surrender your thoughts to the desired happiness you believe with every deep notion of changing your mindset. I find it through My Creator of my understanding.
    I then ask for what I desire. "let's start with happiness" then believe deep down in my soul that I will and am receiving it. Do not doubt the process. Full heartily pray and meditate about what desires are there for you to receive freely and almost effortless devotion to this mindset.
    You will realize less stress and less depression is seeping in your soul filling your heart with purpose.
    Live life as it is intended and be happy wherever you go.
    NOTHING IS HOPELESS !
    you have choice what are you going to do about it?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's Not Easy to live under the same roof with people, especially loved ones, who have Mental issues. It's Not healthy for sure, and it can be a real downer and frowner on your own part, making you go in a slump real quick.
    It's time, however, to focus on you now. Your two other siblings fly the coop and now it is time you thought of spreading your own wings to the same.
    However, with no nest egg saved I find it is Not Off to a good start. You need to find a job first or even ask one of your siblings if you might nest with them for awhile until you get on your feet as you look for a job.
    If that's not possible, do get a job, save as much as you can, so you can decide what is Best from the Rest for you.
    I have left my own mom and dad and very rarely came back to roost with them, mostly just to visit when I can. I made it on my own, met many friends along my way, traveled and lived all over, even abroad, and right Now... It has made me stronger longer and more confident as a person because I did it all by myself, Having... Started off small although smart.
    I know what it means, on another note, to have this sour 'Note' with family who have these issues. But if they are on medication, which is probably the only way they can deal with their problems, then you have to think of yourself so you don't end up going crazy and lazy.
    Good luck. xx

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    • i have money saved up and i dont have time to wait for a job, i have a rent room that i can go in but the job searching is going slow but oh well and my siblings didn't allow me to stay with them because they said i need to be self sufficient and take it seriously

    • Okay, I see and I see as well with the siblings.
      It's good to keep in mind down this thin line that your savings will dwindle eventually if you go to this rented room, which is good tha tyou would have. However, while searching for work, you probably will run out if you do not have a job and be back to the nest again, which will go south again.
      Might I suggest take some of that savings and apply it towards a reputable Employment agency who can help you. This time of Year, dear, the upcoming holidays, may Industrial places are looking for good workers and the pay is not too bad. xx

What Guys Said 3

  • Move to a big city, be willing to take all the trouble, try to make some friends, achieve at least some part of your dreams and be proud that you could stand on your own little feet. If your family puts negative thoughts into you, just keep a little distance with them while same time being friendly. I still remember a quote written on some taxis/ cabs "We love each other, but let's keep some distance" ("keep distance" to avoid a collision). Anyway, at the end of the day, it's to do whatever you think would be best for yourselves as well as to others.

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  • going off to a big city by yourself seems alluring because, you're so far away and caught up that a possibility of crawling back home is nil... well, take it from someone who's tried.

    move out, but locally.

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    • so i should stay in my hometown? but why did you try and it didn't work out

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    • I feel like i have zero motivation to move out, i feel like living with them all these years has made me so depressed that i dont really see it going anywhere, my whole life, i feel like its too late for me to think clearly and i can't even make a decision for myself

    • well i can relate. i've been there.

  • tricky... bt there is alwys that gut feeling that one hers... wht do you feel?

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What Girls Said 1

  • if there's a unhealthy environment leave ASAP!
    its your life how you want to control It
    live sad for rest of your life and nag about everything. Stay where u r
    but never is late... start finding a house from that unhealthy environment and be happy.. find new friends. go out. take fun classes.

    always remember.. its your life. shape it the way you want otherwise someone else will do it for you.

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    • sorry,. away from that unhealthy environment **

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    • you're not a doctor ! are you? take her to a hospital and let her get professional help..
      you live your life. go somewhere you can be you.. you can be happy. trust me. if you stay you'll get sick

    • yeah but i feel like why should i leave while im a student JUST because she is crazy, our mother is enabling her behaviour and i feel its unfair, i feel like i have to rush rush rush to get out and live with strangers or lets say roommates being broke and working a shitty job just because she doesn't get kicked out by 29

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