Guys, Do guys not want to date me because I'm fat?

I've been through a lot in my past relationship with my daughter's father (he was abusive and on drugs, and has never helped me with anything). I since have been going to school and doing excellent,, working, and volunteering. I am hoping to go to a prestegious university soon, and I'm very intelligent. I have learned to love myself, and have learned a lot about what I want and don't want in my next relationship. Why is it that I have not been asked on a date in a long while? I am chubby, but I'm not sloppy fat, and I'm still cute. Is it because I am a mom? Or because I work and go to school both at school, and nobody has time for a relationship, or what? Are men really tbeing shallow, or what's going on?


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11

Most Helpful Guy

  • All three factors (physique, you being a mother, your work and school life) contribute to the fact that guys don't want to date you. And that's a good thing.
    Why?
    Because you really don't need those guys as they don't match your lifestyle neither do you match theirs. You shouldn't worry about guys trying to approach you, because when the day comes some guy will observe you, like you and ask you out. Or you could take the initiative and find out guys you're interested in and hope for the best. :)

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What Guys Said 10

  • A lot of men are shallow because we are visual creatures. The question is at what point do these men walk away? Do they approach you and find out that you're a mother or do they even approach you at all? If it is the latter, then they don't find you attractive.

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  • Someone who is going to school and working is already down to little time for dating. Add your volunteering and there is less time. But toss in being a mom and it would seem that you have extremely little time for dating. Guys see that and that will chase a lot of guys away. Why get into any kind of relationship with someone who has no time for them?

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  • Well, when i had the chance to talk to a woman on a social app for the very FIRST time. i didn't know she actually married, and somehow turned off by it. I mean, what's the point where you received my call close to midnight, where's your husband? Do you mean you want to be disloyal to him?

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  • Maybe you could ask them out? Why does it always have to be the man that ask's a woman on a date?

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  • You need to date older guys. 99% of the 20-25 yr old guys aren't interested in dating a single mom or someone with little to no free time. Date someone in their late twenties or early thirties that has a similar level of responsibility and is more understanding of your time commitments.

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    • But I'm almost 25 and nothing... still...

    • You're going to have to adjust your strategy. Assuming you have your child with you most of the time you're out there's approximately a 0% chance guys are just going to approach you. Women toting children around are perceived as being taken even if theyre not. It's isn't always easy for guys to make a cold approach to women so every time its a calculated risk.

  • Yup happens a lot... fat girls have a much lower chance finding a guy they want. Sad but true

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  • there's plenty guys out there that will date fat girls. you really can't ask for more than you put into yourself though. keep that in mind.

    there's exception to everything, but that's the general scope.

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    • just cuz i wanna date doesn't mean i'd take the first guy thrown at me. i have standards damnit, lol.

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    • not necessarily. beauty is in the eye of the beholder. and physical aspects aren't the only thing people can bring to the table, if you know what i mean.

    • as i've said..

      "there's exception to everything, but that's the general scope."

  • Is this a rhetorical question?

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  • Chances are the kid is more a problem than a few cute pounds. Without your pic (and I'm not fishing) we really couldn't tell.

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  • i'd pork u ;)

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