Found this quote, I feel the pain for all you frustrated nice guys out there !!!
turn it around boys !!
The "friendzone" is essentially a state where a guy (usually) is attracted to a girl (usually) and needs to act (flirt, talk openly about his attraction, make his interest apparent) but he doesn't (out of fear/insecurity/uncertain ty), and instead attempts to gain the affection of the target girl through less direct means. Unfortunately, this creates a situation where the girl is completely oblivious to the attraction and simply perceives the guy as overly nice, clingy, and fawning (or worse, as weak, strange, and groveling). She will probably just see him as urgently seeking her friendship, and may (or not) allow him to be her friend. Meanwhile, she will simply carry on her day-to-day activities, which may include finding a romantic partner on her own. This creates a situation where the guy will become frustrated and redouble his indirect efforts, never realizing that the reason for his entrapment is his own failure to be direct about his attraction. Inevitably he will fail and be frustrated, and rather than realizing his own folly will attempt to blame the girl (or her boyfriend, or "all women") for his failure. Even if the girl becomes single again, the guy is unlikely to maneuver himself to take his place, since his inability to be direct will ultimately lead to his own downfall.
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That's why I have learned to be honest, direct, congruent with my intention
(aka ''let's go out for a drink, i would let to get to know you a little bit more.'')
with every women i met. Put your balls onto the table and whoever girls are interested will play it!
However, with online dating it may work less effective. It takes more time to ''open'' a girl up emotionally when dealing with them on91