Guy who vanished on me now came back? Help?

So I was dating a guy back in August/sept time for about a month! Things were going good & he was the first guy in a really long time I actually liked & thought this could go somewhere. He then vanished, he wouldn't respon to my texts ( I sent 2 in total over the past month or 2 he had vanished)

i writ him off & got on with my life. Now out of the blue today he messaged me 'hey you alright? x' what is his deal? I have no idea what to do about this situation. I'm torn, part of me wants to message him back as I did like him & I would always wonder what if. The other part of me says fuvk him off & that I deserve better. What do I do? How can I accept him back into my life without him thinking it's okay to do what he did?


Most Helpful Guy

  • How long was he gone?

    • About a month. He vanished after I had a sort of 'talk' with him so I'm not too sure if it scared him & he ran as he wasn't ready but now he's had time. Or wether I'm just a back up.

    • Show All
    • I kind of said that if he wanted to call it a day then just let me know. He got the wrong end of the stick thinking I wasn't interested. I explained that wasn't the case & that I liked him & wanted to see where it was going but I got the feeling he wasn't interested anymore. (I was doing the chasing instead of stepping back - my mistake.) he said he found the whole conversation really weird & random. Which I can't blame him, I've been in that situation since & I see him pov

    • You are correct. He was driven off by a perceived lack of interest from you

Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't see why you can't reply but don't me overly friendly. Just say "yeah I'm doing good thanks and you?" or something along those lines. If he truly likes you he'll make up for whatever happened and will bring it up in one way or another but till then keep your distance and just keep contact minimal. If he cares he'll make a effort especially considering how he flaked on you.


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • All you have to do is to ignore him

  • I would just ignore him or tell him I'm not interested anymore. I don't want to be with a guy who vanishes like that anyway. It's just really rude and disrespectful and nothing says he wouldn't do it again.