Why do I seem to go out of my way to ruin my own relationships?

I noticed I've always done it and it upsetting me why I do it I have no explanation for it. Every relationship or guy I've dated I seem to wreck. I get really paranoid thinking they're using me or of talking to other girls while theyre talking to me, I flip out on them and they back off but the weird thing is I'm happy they backed off.

I've been talking to this new guy and I really do like him but I'm getting that panicking feeling. He already told me to be patient and relax and it will all work out. I like I want to be with someone but then when I get the chance I think I'm better off alone.

Does anyone gave any advice on what to do or have been in this situation?



Most Helpful Guy

  • Ahh yes been there too. Where ever I went there I was. It didn't matter who I was with my emotional awareness was all about my own perception of what I deserved at the time. I wanted better but once I had someone in my life now I am forced to worry about losing them. For some miscued reason I thought pretty low of myself and feel that I didn't deserve someone or blame others for wanting someone else because they could do better so i was waiting for the shoe to drop. They are going to leave anyway so i may as well destroy it before it destroys me.
    I was a very insecure jealous person because I thought i wasn't good enough.
    Well my self worth was miscued for sure. I needed to realize my amazing qualities are worth it and that nobody has the power to make me feel less or more than anybody on this earth. we all eat poop and die , nobody has the edge on life. I am unique in my own right as well as you are.
    So basically you just need to own who you are and accept it as it is and that you are built as you are for a reason with qualities that others would adore.
    Once we accept us as we are , we are less opt to project that to our relationships with negative effects.


What Guys Said 2

  • The troll below should go home. You have a self fullfilling prophecy that draws you away from men. Think back to your last relationships with family, friends, and especially parential relationships. All your current logic is based off prior events. Once you realize what it is that is your prophecy you tell yourself you"ll snap out. Good luck, it took me 23 years to find mine and feel never better.

  • You're an insecure chump that needs to sort themselves out. Is that good enough?

    • Don't be such an as*hole there's one for you.

    • @luciamama She's self-sabotaging herself, I used to do it and it wasn't until I was given a few home truths that I was able to mend myself.

What Girls Said 1

  • Your just insecure and afraid to let people close to you. Listen to the new guy relax be patient and take it slow. He might be the one to put your insecurities to sleep especially if he knows about them and is still sticking around.