Is it better to ask if she "is single" or "has a boyfriend" ?

I've been having conversations lately with girls i'm attracted to and i'm not sure where the uncomfortableness comes from. It's all in the dialogue which is why i have to ask this:
Is it better to ask a girl, "do you have a boyfriend?"
OR
"are you single?"

At first it may seem that they are the same friggin thing. I know! I thought this too, but now i'm convinced one will give you a different response because one sounds like you're creeping and the other just curious. Help me out girls, whats this mean to you?

Updates:
Clearly everyone seems to be on the fence about this. That's irritating

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Most Helpful Girl

  • To make it More Comfy perhaps on the safe side, @sethosaurus_rex, in Making light and semi sweet Convo just in passing mention Here: "Your boyfriend is a lucky guy."
    If they are Honest Janes and tell you the Honest John Truth of whether or not they have One this will give you a helpful hint on the hot spot they are "Single" too.
    On the other underhand, those who are Taken, may not want to admit it Offhand.
    Good luck. xx

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What Girls Said 3

  • Ask "are you single".

    It just sounds better and less personal to me. Sometimes putting too much emphasis on the words boyfriend or girlfriend before a relationship can make you look either jealous or a bit clingy so avoid those words.

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  • HAHAHAHA good one! I like the sound of Do you have a boyfriend better however I think in todays society a woman can have a girlfriend too lol so I think to be safe ask if she is single and then you will know also that she isn't keeping anyone on the side line... hopefully

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  • my instinct is to say "are you single" because she might not be single, but also might not have a boyfriend! because, she could be gay, or bisexual.

    honestly, i think "have you been seeing anyone lately" sounds better

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What Guys Said 3

  • I will answer with "it depends"

    I have used a zillion variations but based on the way I felt the conversation was going.

    "Are you single" I find to be a little cold and impersonal. Plus it paints someone who may be dating other people into a corner or have an awkward moment. What if she is seeing 5 guys but only dating them? technically not single nor does she have a boyfriend.

    "do you have a boyfriend" allows for a little more wiggle room and conveys your intention of wanting to see her again.

    Again for me it's all about making it easy. If things are going well and I don't know from any verbal cues I may playfully say, "can I get your number or will your boyfriend mind?"

    If you are interested, ask. If not, don't.

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  • I think it's better to ask " if she is single".

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  • I'd say ask if she's single. seems to go over much better.

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