I recently started dating a girl and I know she's curious about my past love life. She asked me how many serious relations I've had but I'm pretty sure she'll eventually ask me how many girls I had sex with. Considering this number is 17, i'm afraid she'll feel bad or intimidated. What sould I do? Be completly honest or find an acceptable number?
Honestly is USUALLY the best policy, and in this case I'd say yes be honest. But you can soften it up a bit. Maybe try telling her, "I may have been with 17 girls, but hopefully you'll be my last" or something to that extent.
W/e you do, the goal is to make her feel like she is special. Like she is the one you're meant to be with, not those other girls. If she feels intimidated, it'd likely be a sense of "well, who am I compared to all those other girls?" You need to answer that question! Let her know often exactly who she is to you. Make her feel special like she is not just another girl, let her feel like THE girl. You've had many others, but now you've got the right one... That's the impression you're going for. It helps if you can feel it yourself, like she is the girl you've been looking for.
Suss her out first. I realised guys don't have to know the truth. Don't lie though, just beat around the bush or work out viable reasons why the sex wouldn't count.
Bleh, I actually feel really shitty writing that, I would love to be honest with men but men are so judgmental over the number I now know I have to lie. Bleh. But yeah, no one is entitled to know the truth, I think.
Contrary to popular belief, honesty is not always the best policy. I don't think most people are honest with their significant others when asked this question so I wouldn't feel so bad about lying. She'll probably assume you're lying no matter what you say anyway. In some way this question is really designed to make her feel better about herself or more secure, so it's no different from her asking you how you like her new hairdo. And it's very unlikely she'll ever find out the truth. But I also don't think 17 is high enough of a number to really bother her.
17 isn't much. That's a little more than 1 a year if you started early. I think at your age it's a great number, it's not small and it's not ridiculously high (I have friends in triple digits). Judge her character, if she is prudish, go in tentatively or not at all, if she is more open then just say it gracefully. If she is hot and bubbly, she probably has had more than you ha ha
I guarantee that no female is ever honest about who many men she has been with, ever. And it is likely she has had more than you. The law of 3 always applies... guys numbers are usually exaggerated by x3 and girls are usually under stated by x3.
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