Did he just not feel the chemistry with me?

I went out with with a guy I met online for 6 weeks (6 dates). The conversation seemed good and every time after each date, he would make sure I got home ok (via text), text me for the next couple of days and then ask me out again. We had reached the 4th date and no kiss so I figured maybe he was shy and I would make the first move. After the kiss he texted me that kissing me made his night and that he could get use to that. He asked me out on a 5th date and gave me a good night kiss followed by a text saying how good the kiss was. On the 6th date, however, the vibe seemed to change a bit. I was in his car and maybe I went in for the kiss a little earlier than him. We kissed for a bit but then he backed off for a second and said "but it's a school night" (even though he doesn't go to school and works). I just wanted to kiss him and wasn't trying to go to his apt. We continued to kiss and he touched my legs and tried to slide his hand up my dress and I gently stopped him. The kissing didn't last too long. I said goodnight and left his car. The next day, he seemed a bit distant via text but then after that continued to text me as usual but didn't ask me out on a date as he usually does. I am trying to figure out what happened.

Did he feel chemistry with me? If not, then why ask me out on 6 dates? Why slide his hand up my dress? Why say it's a school night? I am confused.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Maybe he figured out after going out on 6 dates but didn't manage to get you onto bed, that's why now he seems a bit distant and uninterested. He said, ''it was a school night'' because he wants to verbally manipulate you that he is not that kind of sexual guy but in fact his action already told you pretty much.

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    • He didn't seem interested in inviting me over to his place. It was strange. I got that vibe on this 6th date, that he wasn't even sure about kissing me. I guess my question is: would a guy kiss you, tell you the kiss was good, slide his hand up your dress and ask you on 6 dates if he didn't feel any chemistry?

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    • Like I said, he's clueless about what he was doing. For now, I think if he doesn't agree to set up a date. Maybe you can ask him back, ''i would love it when you take me out for xxxxx'' See how he reacts. Meanwhile, just continue dating other guys. Don't hung up on 1 choice.

    • Clueless as in he didn't feel anything for me or as in he liked me but didn't know how to behave. I guess I just assumed, he didn't feel the chemistry

What Girls Said 1

  • The signals are a little mixed. The school comment was weird. His hand on your leg is asking for more sexual things.

    Mixed signals are never good signals. Going quiet after being gently rejected for sexual things is not a good thing.

    In my opinion, there are other fish in the sea.

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    • Yes, either 1) other women, 2) not enough chemistry or 3) the guy is not ready for commitment with anyone and senses that I am

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