Dating is simple. Two people intetested, they go out, they see if it works. Only one is interested, don't bother. Simple. I understand the psychology of playing hard to get... scarce resources are more attractive, etc etc. But I find it SUCH a turn off in a guy. I want a guy who knows what he wants. I don't have time to waste on little boys playing games. It's immature and irritating. I am shutting down on the guy I'm dating atm becuase of this. He keeps initating things and then not following through. And then telling me how much he likes me. If he's playing hard to get, tt really is unattractive. Why are men being given this advise? Yeah a guy following me around like a puppy is equally irritating. What is so wrong with straightforward and being upfront, and getting to the point? Jeesh
I so don't get it either. It's like someone once thought: dating is too simple, why not make it more complicated? I don't want games period. I always kinda liked those notes we would write when 9-10yo "Will yu go out wit me? Yes or no". I always liked how straightforward they were lol
Because a guy who shows more interest then the girl shows him will be seen as desperate and girls don't like that, the girl needs to be more into the guy, generally speaking.
But there is a difference in that and simply being flaky or fickle, which is equally unattractive in a guy, and sounds like what this guy is. If you say your going to do something you should do it, that's just a sign of weakness.
I can honestly say playing hard to get is the best way to be women. If you don't you come off as needy and desperate. Plus women will walk all over you if you do and you will end up whipped. Playing hard to get makes the girl unsure if you are interested and if she is somewhat interested she will wonder how you feel, so now you have her thinking about you will most likely make her like you more. Plus it is actually easier to act this way. She wants to make plans doing something you don't want, say no, she has no idea why and you can do something you would rather do. Plus this actually helps with your confidence, you are being your own man doing your own thing and women actually like this. Or at least this is my take. After writing out it actually sounds a bit mean to me. As nice as it would be for everyone just to be straight forward we all play games, men and women alike, just how it is.
Because we're taught not to be clingy or desperate, and that can be an even bigger turn off than playing extremely hard to get. Moderation is key, but better to be labeled as the guy who got nowhere because he played too hard to get than that creep who was too eager
It's all a load of bullshit. If you're keen on a girl they go off you, we all know this, it's either you're too available or they think you're needy or clingy- then you've got the "getting the balance right" so you're not giving them your everything and you're holding back, not texting them back straight away or saying yes when they wanna hang out (being too available) but that is essentially playing hard to get. Girls say they hate games but you need to play games if you want to be successful with them.