He still won't do a sleepover 2 nights in a row? Or spend entire weekends with me ever?

In our 7 months together, we did a sleepover 2 nights in a row only once. Months ago. And that was after he surprised me by asking to do something together again in the evening after parting ways that morning (not typical of him) . We never spend entire weekends together. Even though we now only see eachother on weekends and live a couple miles apart. After a date and sleepover we'll part ways no later than 2 the next day. This weekend we took our first out of town trip 6 hours away for a convention. We left at 8 Friday night and stayed at a hotel. Then he wanted to leave right after the convention. Even though we didn't get back until 2am Sun morning and had to stop at my place first, he declined my invite to spend the night. He said he wanted to sleep in and said he has trouble doing that when it isn't his own bed. He was also in a bad mood at the end of the trip before he said no. Then he sent a good morning text the next day at 11am which is when he typically wakes up at my place! So it's just an excuse. He also said, "Sorry if I was a grouch last night, I was just tired." Since we only see eachother weekends, you'd think he'd want to sleepover especially when it was so late. It makes me feel like he gets tired of me after a day. Like there's no future. Is he not that into me, or what?


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  • Oh my god. My ex was exactly the same, it was all about "his space", and "his comfortable bed", and it was too "inconvenient" for him to stay with me, or even have me stay with him, there's always an excuse. I realized that he was stuck in his ways, and he didn't like me enough to be flexible or accommodate more time (or space) for me, so I ended it, because my needs weren't being met, and you'll drive yourself crazy wanting them to change, or just be slightly different, but in the end you can either try to force them to change, or be miserable about it. I left because I want someone you wants to be around me a lot, and enjoy spending most of our time together, and feels better in my company, than without me.

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    • Yep. Also on worknights he won't even let me stay over anymore. I used to come over on the days he had a long, stressful day. Now that his brother is crashing on his couch, he feels "weird" about me being over. Just because his brother keeps his clothes in the bedroom closet. Most people introduce their gf's to the family. In normal circumstances I could just say hi to his brother. And then my boyfriend and I could go into his room and watch movies and eat take out which is what we used to do on his exhausting work days. When his brother needs clothes he can simply knock like a human being. Is that so hard? But no, that's too "weird" for my boyfriend. He'd rather wait all the way till the weekend and see me for one night. The next night he needs his space even though he gets his space Mon - Thur already.

    • So decide if you want to stay in that relationship, as it is, because you can't force him to change his behaviour, or realize your needs aren't being met and don't settle.

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