Should I pay for the girl's drinks and food on a date?

I had a date with an American girl early this year in. In the end, when the bill came, she offered to split the bill, but I refused and said I will never let a woman to pay on a date. I ended up not sleeping with her because she said she got another plan after the dinner.

I mean I invited her, so I thought I should pay for her. But I've been questioning if I should have taken the offer because I feel like being taken advantage of.

My friend told me he never paid for food and drinks of the girls he banged, with the exception of cheap drinks like coffee and tea.

By the way I live in Asia, how's the situation in your country?

And in case, the girl doesn't offer to pay, how to ask her to pay for herself? Should I just put down my half when the bill comes and wait her to put down hers?

Should we make it clear from the beginning that we're gonna go Dutch?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • How do you feel like you were taken advantage of? She offered to split the bill, but you refused. I'm not making the connection here...

    In the U. S., it is common courtesy for the guy to offer to pay, and the girl's prerogative to take him up on it or insist on paying half. .

    Okay, let me put it another way. In America, it is just common courtesy to pay when you invite someone anywhere, or at least offer (not as courteous, but not the worst). Period.

    You do realize the phrase "going Dutch" came from people's contempt of the Dutch and the stereotype that they were penny pinching cheapskates right? (If any dutch are reading this, no offense, but that is the origin correct?) So, insisting on going dutch from the beginning may or may not paint you in a bad light.

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    • What's penny pinching cheapskates?

    • Show All
    • nice, can you translate the second expression for me @Jack_S

    • Painting in a bad light means portraying yourself in an unfavorable way

Most Helpful Guy

  • She had sex with some other guy. Anyway, the key is to go out for drinks not dinner; eat dinner first then, go out with the girl to a bar. That way if you do decide to buy her drinks, it will be less than buying her dinner.

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    • I was about to ask her for a drink, but she said she has another plan. lmao

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Guys Said 1

  • If I was to go Dutch, I ask when the waiter is asking what I will have.

    My rule of thumb, if I pick the place, I pay.
    If she picks, I'll go split (most of the time)

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    • If she picks, how do you ask her to pay if she doesn't offer to pay?

    • 2 parts. Waiter shows up and asks what will you guys have, I'll go "I'll have... (turn to date) are we going dutch?" Then proceed with order.

      If she says I don't Care or something along those lines, I'll just ask for two bills at the end.

      If she hesitates, I'll never mind the question and decided depending on how the date goes.

      If she says no, the date is gonna get interesting. For me at least.

      Again, all dependent on the situation of course. Career woman vs poor college girl and etc.

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