Guys, Do nerdy guys have more trouble making moves on women? Are they more likely to do nothing rather than something? Or do ALL guys chase women?

I know a lot of people say if someone likes you, you'll know. That no matter how quiet or inexperienced the guy is that he will chase a woman if he is interested.

So, I'm just wondering if I am being too "blinded" because I want him to like me so I'm cutting him breaks. Basically, in college.. I went up to this guy and literally was like I want to get to know you. It wasn't sexual, it was all friendly. I'm a hot, pretty 21 year old. I have guys after me a lot. I'm really picky and I'm more after guys with brains. Anyways, this guy just seemed really interesting because he's into piano, composition, science, he's knowledgable about various things, he's a THINKER. Huge turn on. The thing is, when we are together I really feel the sparks, I know he and his roommates find me attractive.. It's really easy to read their body language. He's really talkative though so he isn't shy. But as my friends put it, he gets no action from women and he has many female friends but nothing further than that so I need to just tell him flat out.. But yet I don't want to ruin what we have.

We go to a academically rigorous school, so I also know he's busy. He just... Isn't all over me like I'm used to with guys. He doesn't message me really.. I mean sometimes, but he's weird that way. Or he will ask me to coffee, lunch, dinner at school... But I need to specifically ask him when and where and whatever. And it only happens like once a week (we met a few weeks ago). I messaged him if he would like to have lunch one day and he never got back to me. And it's been 5 days, and he opened it for sure. Or like sometimes I'll try to message him with small talk and he just won't respond, but in person he acts totally receptive and into me. But I hardly see him in person because our schedules just don't run together that way. I'm kinda tired of putting myself out there if he isn't interested. Or if he just isn't used to a pretty girl into him so he doesn't know what to do? He can't be that shy? I'm not stuck up here, I'm just aware of my physical attributes, and most guys would jump at the opportunity.


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is right up my alley, and I can say speaking on behalf of myself, nerdy guys are more hesitant and definetely have more trouble making moves on a women. Because nerdy often goes hand in hand with intelligence, which then often goes hand in hand with respect. My guess is the guy likes you, but has tremendous respect for you and he is uncomfortable putting you in a situation he feels may be uncomfortable for you. And because he has that respect for you, he will keep it to himself. It's a curse we carry. Unfortunately, in a situation like this two things can happen. One, you wait and wait and wait, till he finally does it because over time he'll realize he is good enough for you. Which could take a very long time, which by the sounds of it you don't have time for. Or, you become the initiator and let him know its him you have on your mind. With that confidence that you picked him, he'll change his tone.

    • Thanks for your feedback. I do have the time... I just want to know if he is actually thinking about me or if he's like ugh get off me. I don't want to keep chasing s guy if he isn't interested. The last message I sent was asking him to lunch and he just never responded... So I mean, what else could I do? He can't be THAT shy?

    • Show All
    • Or say you're bored at home and wanted someone to talk to, talk then transition to saying you wish he was around to hang out with, and just keep going with it.

    • Let me rephrase that last comment, don't say you wanted "Someone" to talk to you. That was an error in my writing. You need to single him out. Say you want to talk to him, say you wish he was around to talk to or hang out with. Don't generalize, pick him, point to him. Let him know it's him.

What Guys Said 2

  • All nerds are nervous about making a move in case it goes wrong or she loves at the guy because she is out of his league.

    I am one of those guys who can't approach a lady cause I think she won't like me or my interestsl.

  • nerdy guys will still hit on women, but they prob will just hit on them on a COD chatroom. its the shy/introverted guys that might do nothing