My boyfriend isn't proud to have me?

My boyfriend and i have been dating for about 11 months, i'm 18 and he's 19 this year. I know he loves me very much, i can feel that whenever i'm with him. The way he treats me when i'm with him is more than i could ask for, but when i'm not with him, he starts to treat me like i'm not his girlfriend, especially when he's over at a friend's place. His friend used his facebook account to talk to some of the girls he don't know to join them that night to the club (which i wasn't going) and it really upsets me. I told him i was not happy about his friends using his account to talk to those girls, i explained to him because i don't want those girls thinking he's available and does not have a girlfriend, i want people to know that he has a girlfriend and that's me, especially that he does not have a single photo about me or us anywhere on social media. He got mad and thought i was being stupid and he just told me to leave him alone and i that was being childish. But it really upsets me. and whenever we meet again, he'll act like nothing has happened. And when i mentioned it, he'll just laugh it off and said he was just mad at that point. I haven't talked to him about "not posting pictures of us" on social media and not being proud of me, but i don't dare to talk to him about this because we're just going to quarrel about this or he'll just ask me to get over it and "grow up". He recently changed his facebook cover to his group of friends and 2 girls that he doesn't know from that day he went to the club. It really upsets me how he could have some other girls on his social media but not me. It upsets me how his friend's feelings are always more important than mine. I know maybe i'm being childish for a 18 year old but it really really upsets me. He has a past of cheating on his girlfriend. I know he has already changed, but i'm still afraid that he'll do it to me. He said if he wants to cheat, he would have cheated on me long ago, or "you don't trust me" and gets mad. I don't know what to do, he won't talk nicely. It's either he gets really mad or he's not being serious and jokes about everything

Updates:
I don't know if i should break up or try to make things work. Both our families are very picky of each other's partner, but both our families really like us being together. He treats my mother like his own mom, and his family really likes me, i feel like it's a waste if we break up

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Obviously I don't know his true intentions but I've done similar things in the past.

    When on social media I never had any pictures of my partners nor did I ever mention the fact that I was in a relationship. I wasn't embarrassed I just didn't like the drama and attention from other people talking about it. (Most people don't feel this way)

    From what You have said, you both love each other so I think you should try to work things out.
    Do you think you are an embarrassment, if so why?
    If you dislike something he does you have the right to confront him, and he should answer truthfully in an appropriate manner.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • First of all, you're hardly one year apart, he's not even considered "older". Second, you sound like you're dating an asshole. It's not my place to say really, but your relationship, based off what you're saying, sounds not so great.

    Let me tell you about my relationship and boyfriend. My boyfriend (also several months older than I) prioritizes my comfort, happiness, and wellbeing. He cares. Your boyfriend doesn't. My boyfriend cares about how I feel about things and my opinions and preferences on things. And vise versa. We have a very loving and strong relationship because we communicate but we also actually fucking listen to each other.

    You're trying to communicate with your boyfriend, but he's just laughing things off and getting all immature and you state he has a history of cheating... yeah. He's not the ideal guy, nor does he deserve your efforts.

    Honestly, I know this just went from 0 to 100 but I wouldn't be wasting my energy on someone like him. He's sounds so dumb lmao.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Those are pretty big red flags. You have to either solve this issue or breake up.

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  • Does nobody use paragraphs on this site? Jeez!

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  • Look missy... first of all, I want to say that there are A LOT of guys out there who will treat you better, period nuff said. Next is, a good boyfriend will always take care the needs of her girlfriend, anything to make her happy always, period again. Third is, I worry of his cheating past. If you add his behavior now and relate it to his history record... I will surely have strong doubts. Lastly, communication is the most important part of a relationship, and he often skips it? Worse is blame YOU? what the. So ask yourself... is this what you want for yourself? Because if I am your boyfriend... you'll never feel this long that it reaches the point that you ask help from strangers. Im sorry

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What Girls Said 5

  • It's not a waste. He isn't treating you with respect, and his behavior is shady at the very best. You can do better for yourself, and your parents may like another man later on too. Regardless, your happiness should be your top priority in choosing a partner.

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  • I think he is the one being childish. For one, he refuses to listen to your side of the story even though you are quite distraught. Second, he has a history of cheating (I'm not saying that the term "once a cheater, always a cheater" is ALWAYS true, but, let's be honest here, it usually is). Third, he insults you.

    You're worried he'll cheat again which not only proves a lack of trust which is essential in a relationship, but you should give yourself some credit and pay attention to what your instincts are telling you. He also doesn't seem to care very much about your feelings and doesn't work towards fixing the problems that make you feel this way, so that in itself is a huge red flag. It seems to me that you're wasting your time with someone who will only continue to hurt you. I would highly suggest dumping him and looking for someone who will treat you better, not only behind closed doors but in public as well.

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  • He's a jerk and he's using you. There's no other way to put it. You're young and have your whole life ahead of you. You'll ruin your life and end up with no self-esteem if you put up with crap like this. Don't waste any more time with him
    You'd do better starting over with someone new without this history.

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  • I'm kinda going through the same thing. My boyfriend (24) acts like he really likes me (21) when we're together and texts me every morning to tell me good morning. But I too feel like when he's with friends he's different and will often ignore my texts and stuff. I have caught him talking to other girls and I put a stop to it right then! Maybe if you threaten to leave and it don't scare him then obviously he don't care, and probably has someone else on the side too. I'm sorry you are going through this no girl should feel mistreated or unwaneed by there boyfriend! I hope everything works out for the best for you!! And stay strong nomatter what happens.

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  • His friend is not using the account dear, he is using the account to talk to girls

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