Why do guys seem interested but then they act different the moment you show interest?

There is this guy at the gym who came up to me complimented me on my squats and I found out from another freind at the gym that earlier he had come up to him asking who I was what my name was etc. I started chatting with him just regular how are you are you new here etc, talked about gym stuff had good convo lughed some. He said if I ever needed any help in gym just ask, so I did one day exhancged names, looked him up on fb offered to hang out sometime if he ever wanted to since he said he was new in town and didn't know anyone. He said thats awesome, thank you sounds good but that was all, about a week later I asked if he may want to hang out get a drink, he didn't get the message until like two days later and said wow so sorry just got this message and that was it and now at the gym we dont chat but he says hi to me. I dunno should I just assume there is no interest or are there some guys who are afraid to make a move or they try and play it cool when they are thinking a chick likes them? Like the whole play hard to get?


What Guys Said 1

  • I read it all, but I just want to answer to the title.

    It's like when a kid is asking to her parents for icecream. He begs and begs for hours, and they always say no. After some time, they get tired of his begging and cave in, asking "Alright! What flavour do you want?" and they're just like "Huh ? I dunno, I never thought I'd made it this far".

    Point is, sometimes it's just the idea that is appealing, and not the actual thing happening. Like when people fantasize about crazy sex stuff, but they wouldn't actually do it.
    The movie High Fidelity depics this thought in a nice way, in the sense that we may aspire some things, but in reality they always have flaws, and at some point, he start to think about those flaws before we live it, sparing us the regret.

    (I don't think it's the hard to get thingy, he's either not interested, or just afraid of what can come out of it)
    I wish you luck on your next encounters :)

    • Thank you! Makes sense! :)

What Girls Said 1

  • He's probably only interested in the hunting part. He doesn't get the same thrill when he manages to actually get the girl. It's a sign of immaturity.