I just recently (past 4 months) reentered the world of dating after a series of consecutive long term relationships. Basically, this is the first time I have "dated" around and not immediately jumped into a new relationship. The one thing putting me off is how often guys say (on a first date, mind you,) "you are beautiful," or "you are very attractive," or "you have beautiful eyes." I do enjoy the compliments and I appreciate them. But, I'm starting to feel like they are just go-to comments. I don't know whether to feel special or not because I hear them all the time. Dating sucks. It sucks even more when you have been hurt in the past and have a tough time trusting anyone. So, when these guys who are seemingly awesome...(we click, chemistry, great conversation, fun,) start with the compliments or ask why I'd even be interested in them, I run. I feel like they are just buttering me up. They are educated good guys too, Doctor, college football coach, university professor. So I feel like I'm choosing the right guys, just not into all the compliments starting day 1. Is it just the way things are now? (Btw, I'm 30.)
Most Helpful Guy
1. Well for a fact you may very well be a beautiful girl with good features which is why the compliments :)
2. Yes it's common for guys to compliment girls on a date but she's got to have something that deserves complimenting isn't it? (with due respect to every girl)
3. Complimenting is normal for me date or no date. If I like something in and on you I will compliment. It's never meant to flatter or for any favors :)
4. I did meet up this girl on a blind date a few months ago. I was chivalrous to her etc (that she actually didn't appreciate or like lol) as it's my nature to be so. But again I didn't find anything in her looks and /or demeanor to compliment and I didn't. Not that she didn't have any but I didn't feel comfortable around her - simple. Maybe if she had made me comfortable enough I'd have gone beyond the feeling of slight discomfort and yes seen what deserves a compliment. And in which case you sure deserve complimenting on the fact that you do make these guys feel comfortable around you :) <31
Most Helpful Girl
Anything is whether taken the good way or the bad way, it's completely normal for a guy to say so while on a date, it's a date, he actually must find you attractive and sexy and beautiful, or why even bother lol! on what is he spending the bill!
There are two possibilities to see it whether he's just saying so to get in your pants, or he really means it.
Guys analyze this logically so they don't understand your deep feelings like any woman would do, but I think it's all about affected by really really shitty relationships you've been through, and you only see it the bad way, that he just selfish and he's saying so to only get to what he wants.
you see it this way because you choose this way, like me, I work on a non-profit college help teem, and many of my fellows come to me only when they need help, I whether take it the bad way, which is they only look for what they want and they're selfish and on normal occasions they wouldn't even care if I existed, or take it the good way that we're actually seen as successful people (me and my team), but frankly when I'm in a bad mood I mostly see it the bad way, and the other way around. That's exactly how it is with you, if you're like so I should say you're not yet ready for it, try to be more open to it.0