Why is it that when I decide to give the guys who say they are nice a chance and get to know them they turn out to be assholes?

Nice guy my ass

I use to ask myself where are the good guys?

But I think the assholes just evolved into assholes in the disguise of good guy


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Most Helpful Guy

  • a real nice guy won't have to tell you he is a nice guy. Seems like guys these days think that simply not pressuring a girl for sex right of the bat, that makes them a nice guy. There are really nice guys out there, they just won't tell they are. You'll know it

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're right. The "nice guy" doesn't exist. There are nicER guys out there but they still have asshole tendencies. After being pursued by who I thought was a "nice guy" for over a year, I gave him a chance. We got pregnant and after a few months of him saying he was committed and all that, he left me pregnant for a teenager who had just finished high school days before. Nice guys are usually assholes who've learned the right things to say.

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What Guys Said 12

  • Do not give up hope. the nice guys that will treat you right and respect you and honor your desires are all around you. the difference is they typically do not put themselves out in the forefront, due to the majority of pain they had suffered from being looked over since most women (girls) seek and or pick the bad boy.

    most good guys are very patient and will not pursue someone who is not seriously looking for them in particular. most nice guys have been burnt on many occasions. So that doesn't help your chances when they see you taking an asshole in disguise. Nice guys know the intentions of other guys and when they see you picking a bad guy you are off the nice guys radar.

    So it is all up to you. if you seriously want a nice guy with all the nice sweet intentions, then be patient enough to seek it and or wait for the path to cross. but when you continuously pick just anybody you limit your luck significantly.

    bad dudes are are easy to spot, so the nice guy turning into asses is all your own misconception.

    IF: you seriously desire a guy of your dreams then absolutely believe you will receive that. but if you focus on a nice guy is a front for asses then that is exactly what you draw towards you. so change your mindset and you will practice patience and blind faith that that one right guy is out there waiting to meet you and it will happen.

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  • Stick in their and ull get a good guy

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  • If a guy has to tell you he is a nice guy, he most likely is not.

    Just like girls who say they aren't crazy... They are the craziest ones.

    We need to hook up the nice guys with the not crazy girls and make a reality TV show :)

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    • Don't lie some of you guys whine about being put in the friend zone. You don't have to call yourself a nice guy to imply it
      And I do not have sex with these assholes

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    • I know that

    • So why are you telling me not to lie? We were on the same page...

  • Not every guy are assholes but the nice guy alsk seem to get hurt bad

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  • well in my younger years i was a nice guy. the modern state of women turned me into an asshole. also maybe they are assholes to you because you're not a good girl

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    • I am a good girl but thanks for assuming things you do not know about, dumb ass
      You chase underage women anyways so anything you say from here on out is irrelevant

    • i dont chase underage girls why would you even say something like that.

  • i'd nice guy your ass too.

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  • Why do you post rants disguised as questions?

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  • I'm definitely not a nice guy that's for sure. Gets you nowhere.

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  • I haven't been one to anyone in here I don't believe, if I have been sorry didn't realize lol

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  • lol, you're funny. Good guys are always good guys, you just don't see it like that, because of your age

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    • What does my age have to do with that

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    • Well I'm sorry I ever answers then, I can't seem to take ou seriously either, as evident in my initial answer

    • Have something useful to say

  • Look for the guy who doesn't care what people think. that way you can tell what his personality is.

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  • Not evolution. Blatant Asshole > Asshole as Nice Guy. Most guys start out truly good and then turn into assholes because it works better. In essence assholes are guys who refuse to play by socially established rules because said rules do not work and cause negative consequences for them. You can't really except someone to continue playing by your rules when it causes them nothing but pain.

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What Girls Said 3

  • That's a bit true. And then people on the outside say "why is she with him? He's a jerk! All women love assholes!"

    But they don't realize he wasn't an asshole from the getgo. He was nice and caring, but gradually he changed. Just little by little so you wouldn't notice it. So you won't freak out by a sudden flip of his personality.
    So then, years later, the changes are so gradual, you're left there wishing he was "like before". But you can't pinpoint when was the moment he changed because he did it little by little.

    And then everyone around you sees it only now, and they declare women must love jerks. But he wasn't always like that. And you were just waiting for him to change back. And then he does do random acts of passion and romance with enough nagging, and you hope he continues. But it's rare. And he does the absolute minimum to make you stay. And he continues to decline.

    But before you know it, it's too late. The sweet guy, quickly rotted and turned bitter. And you've been with him so long. That it's probably just that you're accustomed to him, and it's not even love. Or you love him but you're not in love anymore. You're desperate trying to revive the wilted flower. But the more water you pour, the more it rots.

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  • Guys lie about stupid shit to us and a good at implying they are good guys. With experience you'll figure out which ones are worth dating or talking to and eventually dating. Treat it as a game it could be fun lol

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    • Then again, can you really blame guys for lying? Girls have such incredibly high standards, that many guys are forced to lie at least a little.

    • @Maverickj No we don't. I don't want to be included in this high standard shit so don't speak for me. Yes, girls love being spoiled. I myself. But not crazy amounts of stuff. Kisses, hugs and being told he loves me and showing me affection. It's cute and lovely when a guy buys girls chocolates. Those things go a long way. I don't believe in guys spoiling us with cars and expensive jewellery. I like my men to be hard working and aren't shy of what job they have, what car they drive. My husband came from a humble background when I met him, worked at a shitty grocery store and now he's moved to Canada with me (he's from the UK) he worked up and now he works at a big bank company. He's never had a car and he's never had much money. Despite all this I married him. I looked past all that shit and its funny because where I come from, you HAVE to marry rich. I didn't pay attention to that stuff, I looked past it. So I don't know what kind of girls you're talking about lol

  • The self-proclaimed "nice guys" usually aren't actually nice. Not all of them, but I've seen some that say they are but are really passive aggressive, sexist, or something. There are guys out there that aren't like this, I know a few but of course they are already taken.

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