Is it true that girls don't like a guy who is a virgin or inexperienced? Should I lie?

So I just saw a question where I saw l read that a virgin guy is a turn off to a women and they think that it is disgusting and that something is wrong with him? They wrong date him or be very reluctant to date him?

I am doomed being a 23 old virgin? Should I lie about having no girlfriend and just tell the girl that I had 2 girlfriends they asked me... Or lie about being a virgin?

  • Yes lie.. It's OK
    10% (20)32% (62)20% (82)Vote
  • Not dont lie (explain why)
    90% (190)68% (130)80% (320)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm gonna give you MY (EMPHASIS ON "MY" BECAUSE I DON'T SPEAK FOR ALL WOMEN) honest opinion. If I had some sort of magical powers where I could pick from any man, I probably wouldn't want a virgin. BUT WAIT, I don't want a "player" either. I prefer a guy to have similar amount of partners as me. Give or take a few, so ideally from 1-5 partners.

    Does this mean I wouldn't give virgins a shot? No. Don't be melodramatic. I definitely would not turn down an awesome guy just because he's a virgin.

    Would I turn down a guy with over 5 partners? No. But I do have a limit and anything over 15 is intimidating and too much.

    Why don't I want a virgin? Simple. I'm lazy and I want good sex. I'll do my part, but I'm too lazy to teach someone. So I prefer at, least some experience, but not too much lol
    Remember that people tend to go for their equals. And I find that virgin girls are eager to pair with virgin men.

    But I don't think that they're losers. I don't think virgin men are weird. And I don't think there's anything wrong with them. I'm willing to date one, though it's not my preference.

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    • But you always have to teach each other every time you're in a new relationship. What a guy did on a previous girl that drove her crazy may not do anything for you and vice versa things you may have done that previous bf's have liked may not be things he likes. Every new relationship may as well be between two virgins because you have no clue what makes them tick.

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    • That is a fair assessment.

    • Look. I'm not completely against virgin men. I won't not give him a chance because of it. In fact, there was this attractive little middle east man in one of my classes. He was really sweet and I liked him. I liked him a lot, I wanted to ask him out. He was a Muslim. He was abstinent until marriage, he never even had a girlfriend.
      I'm atheist. And I did want to, but I knew he'd say no.
      So I never pursued it. Not because he was a complete kissless virgin, but because I doubt he'd ever want to date me.

      So it's not like I'm gonna be "ewwww. Virgin! Let's spit on him!"
      It's just that I prefer, emphasis on prefer NOT REQUIRE, someone with a bit of experience.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I find it somewhat amusing how most girls here write the sensitive "no don't lie, that's bad m'kay" answer but then will go to OP's mentioned poll and vote on virgin guys being unattractive.

    Look ladies. You have this mentality where whenever a friend or whomever asks for advice, you say not what they NEED to hear. But what they WANT to hear. You'll say anything just to be sensitive to their feelings. Although that quality is admirable, your unwillingness to hurt his feelings, it works against him. I mean... why do you vote in that poll about a virgin guys being a turnoff but then start singing a different tune as soon as you're asked directly whether a guy should be honest about being virgin or not?
    You yourselves proved that virginity in a man is unattractive. It's only logical to assume that the best way for an virgin guy to get laid is to either not reveal it or lie about it because, again, you yourselves proved virginity is unattractive.

    Please answer, which of your advice should men take into consideration - that virginity is unattractive as proven in the polls, or that a guy should risk revealing it?

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What Girls Said 74

  • i won't date a man who isn't a virgin, if that's any consolation to u. some girls prefer them. regardless of whether or not ur a virgin though, u must be open and honest from the start. u can't build a relationship on a lie.

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  • Don't ever lie.

    Some girls prefer inexperience.

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    • i prefer virgin guys. Thinking of my boy who has sex before just makes me feel uncomfortable.

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    • @AlwaysAProblem

      Well, I know my friend lost it to and then imprinted on his now fiancé.

    • Looooooooool, Your profile pic cuts off your head while your avatar is that of a horse head. I'm picturing you with a horse head hehe.

  • i would much rather date someone who is a virgin to be honest. Be honest. :) If she judges for that, she is not worth your time.

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    • Thanks... You are sweet! And yup. You are right

  • No, most girls don't like a guy who lies. If you lie she will be perceptive enough to see through your lies. Girls want to be able to trust a guy, if he lies and deceives her she'll feel betrayed.

    If someone lies to me then it brings every truth into question. Lying , regardless of the reason behind the lie is a dealbreaker for me

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  • aww it's ok! if a girl thinks your're a loser for being a virgin, she's the worthless one.

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  • Don't lie. At the same time you don't have to reveal everything! Some things aren't anybody's business. If you're planning on taking the next step with one person, tell that one person before you have sex but you don't have to tell every girl you date that you haven't had sex yet. Some girls love it, some not so much but if anyone shames you for it, they're definitely not someone you want to date. They're assholes. Everyone's different, nobody should be shamed and I don't think you will be :)

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    • Thanks for your opinion.. :-)

      Yup I won't lie about it

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    • lying is to change the fact to something you want or hide it etc for some reason. but don't reveal it its like there's no need to say it bc it's not her or business but maybe at some level may reveal it
      First date is to know each other and build some trust

    • @kenblue yes. Totally agree with you there.

  • Honestly, for me, it's more about dynamic between us.

    If you're a virgin, I get to teach you.. to mold you into what I like..

    and with practice, you get better...

    Non-virgin guys rarely "get better" they've already learned the tricks they care to :P

    I guess, my only reluctance.. might be with the reason why.

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    • Hahaha LOL I wouldn't mind learning at all... Haha

  • It is so unattractive to lie about virginity, it just points to your own insecurity of yourself and that is one of the most unattractive qualities in a person. If she finds out you were lying, things may not go well for you two.

    Being honest, unapologetically, for who you are is confidence, and that IS one of the most attractive qualities a person can possess.

    Also, 23 is not a big deal to still be a virgin. You are not doomed. We live in such a sexualized society, media (TV, movies, music, magazines) are pretty much telling us we should be sexually active at a young age or else something is wrong with us. Don't let society pressure you or make you feel ashamed of anything.

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  • I don't mind inexperienced guys but I do hate liars

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  • I don't really mind either... If it's a hook up or friends with benefits I'd prefer an experienced guy, if it's a boyfriend I don't mind him being inexperienced, that way I can teach him what to do and make him do things exactly the way I like it. 😏 Some "experienced" guys are so up themselves thinking they know how to please a girl, bitch please... 😒

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  • Absolutely nothing wrong with being a 23 year old virgin male. If the woman can't accept something as simple as that then they're not worth pursuing a relationship with. The only time I would understand why they would see you being a virgin as a problem would be for a one night stand kind of deal. Just be you and do what you feel is right.

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  • Don't lie about it. The right girl won't care.

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  • That one question does not represent ALL women no more than a bigoted judgmental male asshole who spews misogyny represent ALL men.

    It's very simple: some women aren't into inexperienced men, some don't care, and some prefer them. This will never change nor is it new.

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  • I've never met a girl who's had a real problem with a boy being a virgin but every girl i know will have a problem with a boy lying to her... tell the truth

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  • LOOK u don't need to tell anyone but your gf!

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  • I actually would like it better if a guy was a virgin as i am one too and we can discover it together... but it would be awkward if I'm the one to be comfortable to have sex before he is lol...

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  • NEVER. EVER. LIE. Lying, especially about your virginity as it will get you nowhere. Just be up front and honest with the person and make sure it is someone you truly love and care about. No one should put you down for being a virgin, if they do, they are assholes and you are better off without them anyway. Also, only have sex when you are ready. Do not conform to society and let them think it is something that you MUST have accomplished by now. Also, being one myself, I prefer my partner is. That is just my opinion. Also, lying from the beginning of a relationship is doomed to cause issues further on as well. Good luck! :)

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  • Honestly, I actually prefer a virgin. In most cases I would only date a virgin, but for some particular and specific cases, I'm OK with him not being a virgin.

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  • My boyfriend was a virgin when we started dating. Maybe it'd have bothered me if I didn't like him, but he has no habits and stories of "my ex used to do this and that so you should as well".
    Couldn't be happier.

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  • Lying serves jogging besides making you a liar. Be truthful. Not everyone sees it as bad or odd.

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    • Nothing* not jogging

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    • Yeah, why not?

    • That's great

  • I don't think you should feel ashamed of being a virgin at the age of 23. I'm 24 and turning 25 in a couple of months and I'm still a virgin. I don't think you need to lie about it to be honest.. Yeah, there might be some girls who'll think that your inexperience might be a problem, but so what? I personally don't think there is something wrong with a person just because they are still a virgin in their 20s. Society puts too much pressure on people nowadays to lose their virginity in their early teens. The girls who break up with a guy or who find a fault with him just because he's a virgin are not worth it anyway - they are just looking for a quick nookie anyway.

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  • don't lie.. I personally don't give a fuck if a guy is virgin.. we can get experience together.. hehe..

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  • Don't lie. It's going to be obvious that you're a virgin anyway.

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  • If you're looking for a relationship then tell the truth. If it's a one night stand, then go ahead and lie.

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  • Nope. Lying is not good. There's no need to scram you're a virgin either

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  • Here's the thing: she'll know if you life and anyways, in my opinion, virginity stays until marriage!

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  • She'll know if you're an amateur in bed lmao. If you say you're not then she will be like "He sucks in bed" and won't be that understanding if you're new if you hide it. Plus some girls like inexperienced guys. I personally think its a bit hot to fuck a guy whose virgin cuz he'll feel lucky :D

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  • In my opinion a girl that says that has probably slept with multiple guys feels ashamed so she wants to even out the score if you will. Or a hoe. But I personally think a guy who waits I'd better than a guy who doesn't. They save themselves for their one true love not just have sex with anyone.

    Look for a girl who's waiting too. and don't lie if she doesn't like that her loss. It's not about experience some people just want to make others feel bad because they didn't wait.

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  • don't lie. You might get caught in your own lie, and there's really no need to in this case. It's not a turnoff. Everyone's gotta start somewhere

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  • Some girls find that cute believe it or not.

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    • Yes, this, The guy I like has never dated or even kissed... I think it's cute, partly because he's shy. But even if you're not shy, it's still cute. And I think it's better to save losing your virginity for your wedding night... I think that's REALLY cute/sweet. But I guess it all depends on the girl. The girl that will be worth it is the one who won't care if you're a virgin or not,

    • @justagirl5 yeaa you are right... a girl who doesn't care about the virginity is worth the time :-)

    • Oh yeaa I know..:-)

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What Guys Said 51

  • Yeah, most girls dislike virgin guys, that's one of the reasons why guys want to lose it early, cause when they reach a certain age (usually 20) they're seen as weird.

    You could lie, yes, but it's not that easy to make it believable unless you're are truly confident and know you what screw up your first time.
    If you'r gonna lose it to a one night stand, lie. If you're gonna lose it to a girlfriend, don't lie, it isn't something you should lie about in a relationship, plus, if after she knows she rejects you (which is very possible), you'll know she's not the right girl for you.

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  • In my personal experience, girls haven't cared about my virginity. It's guys who seem to give all the shits about it.

    In some cases, girls were flirting with me specifically BECAUSE they somehow heard that I was a virgin.

    There are definitely girls out there who care, sure. But that is no different or less judgmental than a guy who won't accept a girl who ISN'T a virgin. And I never went out with the kinds of girl who would think like that, anyway. But maybe I just have a low tolerance for bullshit.

    Most girls don't care. The minority love it or hate it. So I wouldn't worry about it. If she matters, she won't care. If she cares, she doesn't matter. Look at it that way, and don't sell yourself short.

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  • If you lie - you'll look bad in bed.. Nkt just for that once but forever (unless you prove her wrong)

    If you tell the truth - she won't expect it to be mindblowing.. Just quickly blowing

    But that being said.. My first time was my favourite.. I lasted long enough.. She came a lot too

    It was all good :)

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    • My first time I didn't even cum girl got fucking tired after about 40 minutes and said no more please man I felt great even though I didn't cum

  • If your dating the girl don't lie but if it's a girl you've been talking to that your not in a Revelations with lie, trust me don't listen to the girls that say don't lie because a lot of girls don't even understand or realize how cold they are, girls don't want to sleep with a guy that is inexperienced and won't be able to make them orgasm, it's a waste of time it's like you having sex and not being able to ejaculate, whats the point? Unless your dating her she will be willing (hopefully) to deal with it because you are most likely going to do it again and plus it's a opportunity to connect but with someone that is just someone that isn't into you and your not into her emotionally, maybe physically you should lie, the girl I lost mine to didn't know and I don't think she would had slept with me if she knew, I didn't lie she just assumed I wasn't and I was good at it the first time I only told her because I was having trouble fingering her and putting my penis in and I didn't want her to feel insecure and think it was her fault. This knowledge is based from experience.

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  • Lying for sex is pretty bad.

    However, yes, most women will prefer an experienced lover. This is because women are really hard to please sexually. It takes a lot of knowledge and experience to be able to do so.

    But just because it might make it harder for you to find a fuck buddy or something of that nature most women will not care when it comes to their partner. Soooo yeah lol

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  • I love how all these pathetic guys are talking about how being a virgin affects it so much, it's like a guy like me who has to shave his head- a lot of girl like it, a lot of girls don't, and there's attractive ones on both sides, I had opportunities with another virgin (who was hot mind you) and I turned it down because I wanted something real. These other guys saying different are just angsty kids, I don't care what the age says, a lot of guys don't mature

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  • One thing is what girls say, and another what girls do man. And to be completely honest, most girls prefer experienced guys, rather than a virgin.

    Why? Simple: Experienced guys are, for the most part, taken for confident guys and (hate to say it) non desperate.

    If you feel uncomfortable by saying you are a virgin then it's completely ok to lie. Don't make up any stories though and make sure you know how to lie (otherwise just don't do it). If you are asked and you feel like saying "yeah, I dated a couple times before and just didn't work out" or something just say it.

    Better to lie with confidence than telling the truth and let your insecurity rat you out.

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  • Just lie man, no matter how these girls try to sugarcoat it, the minute you admit that you're going to regret it. Do this, study cunnilingus techniques a lot, until you have them down pat. When you get with a girl, do lots and lots of foreplay and then go down on her, if you do a good enough job she's not going to mind as much if you do a "poor" job on intercourse (which is just going in and out of her, no big deal). If she asks if you're a virgin, just say you only had sex once and it was a long time ago, not that hard.

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  • Lying from the start is not a good foundation to build on. Be honest and if a woman ejects you for that she isn't worth your time anyway.

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  • DUDE, you know what? If they are that much of an A-hole to not go out with you because you're a virgin, then those little prostitutes aren't worth your time.

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  • I would not lie and just be honest. Some girls will really appreciate you for it. Selfrespect is important!

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  • Don't lie. If she can't accept it she's not worthy of you anyways. Actually I think it would be better to just tell her, so she's she doesn't expect you know what you're doing.

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  • Say: "I don't like to talk about the past. I prefer to enjoy the present" and then go for the kiss!!!

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  • trust me, majority of the guys out there between 20-25 are either virgins or so desperate the only reason they aren't is because they went for hookers and butterfaces or fugly girls, its only when ur over 30, tables are turned, single ladies start to get desperate and men get it easily, i personally have only kissed a girl once and dry humped another and have more experience than 99% of the men i know in india

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  • Man its rough. Women are shallow as fuck. Men could care less about experience but women are not so understanding. Now i still say be honest. The reason? You dont want a shallow bitch. You want quality women. They won;t care.

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  • even if it's a turn off for the girl in question (which it might be), it's better that you find a woman that is willing to be accepting of your inexperience rather than a woman that's going to be a cold frigid bitch about it.

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  • Lack of experience will be self evident, you can't fake what you haven't learned, and then the lie will be transparent.

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  • I did the fake it till you make it type of thing. Worked like a charm, however i wouldn't suggest it unless you are desperate.

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  • Most girls wouldn'twant to hookup with a virgin but they are open to dating one, although it's probably not their ideal scenario.

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    • I don't want a hook up either... I would go for something serious..

  • Let's put it this way. Some girls won't mind if you're still a virgin. Some girls will mind if you're still a virgin. Pretty much all girls won't mind if you're not a virgin

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  • girls are biologically hardwired to chase guys who other girls chase. If you didn't have at least few (sexual) partners for your age, she'll think sth is wrong with you (these are woman's words). It should be in your interest to lie, but not so much that it's obviously fake. And don't feel bad about lying, women do this all the time, starting at sexual partner count and continuing with other big lies.

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  • just be honest, it shouldn't matter

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  • It is none of her business that you are a virgin until you guys are going to have sex. If you're just at the dating/making out stage it's not information she needs to know

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  • Don't lie, but don't bring it up either. Let her think you're simply bad at it, rather than inexperienced.

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  • Don't tell a woman you are a virgin and never show her weakness. Humans are still animals following instincts.

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  • I've been rejected 6 times for being a virgin. I wouldn't lie, but yeah women despise it.

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    • The majority of women that dismiss it are sexually experienced.

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    • I talked with all of these girls for a few weeks and wanted to date and of course the topic of sex comes up. They kinda ask what I like and I say I don't know.

    • Well that's sad... But are you still a virgin or you finally got someone who didn't mind

  • Wouldn't you be honored to find a girl who tells you you are their first? I lost my virginity at 18, and after 5 relation I became married and my wife wishes I was her first.
    Girls may feel unworthy after having sex with other men.
    They are looking for experience dating friend that take them out for a good time

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  • It is going to be your first time so make it special and she might even like you more since you are a virgin and even teach you a few things

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  • It doesn't matter. Bieber was a virgin for a long time too.

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  • Women hate liars man. Always be honest.

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