He doesn't respond to cutesy/relationship-type comments. Should I be worried? Or is this just his way of slowing things down?

I've been seeing someone for a little over 3 months now. At the beginning, things were great! We spent 1-2 days each week with each other, planning dates, etc. And then one day, he got cold feel and reeled the relationship back. He wanted to slow things down.

I've read that when a man initiates the relationship talk, it means he cares and is interested about the relationship and where it is going. Is this true? Guys wouldn't really even consider having a heart to heart with the woman they are casually seeing, right?

Since then, things have been on his terms, and he's doing a pretty damn good job at holding back. He doesn't text sappy, relationship type things like, "I miss you"; "when can I see you?" "Goddamn, you're beautiful"; "I can't wait to see you". Whatever sappy, fluffy thing most women like to hear, I get zilch. In the beginning, he was all cutesy. But this may simply be because that's not the type of person that he is, and in the beginning, he was trying to win me over. And as far as seeing each other, we've been farely consistent about seeing each other once a week. I don't need all the fluffy stuff to be happy, I just want to feel like he's interested and that I am something to him.

Every time I say something cutesy in a text, I get nothing. But in person, if I say I missed him, he'll respond by saying he missed me too. He could also just feel forced to say it in person because he's "on the spot".

Should I be worried? Is this a mechanism he's using to slow things down?


What Guys Said 1

  • I think the happy honey moon phase of the dating part is over. I think he did all those things to when you over. And like you said I don't think that was who he was. I think if you are in it for the long term with him then what you see is what you get with him.

    • You're probably right. It just sucks because it all happened pretty soon after he did the slow down, and it's been driving me bat shit crazy. He considers himself "boring", and I feel like a lot of the times that we have spent together, he's afraid that I will get bored with him. Maybe that has something to do with the whole slow down--see where I continue to stand, and see if I'm in it for the long haul. In his last relationship, she cheated on him because of something similar to this. I'm far from that, nor will I ever do that, but it may be one of those things that he wants to see how I am when things have slowed down considerably.

      My intention is to talk to him this weekend about it, so I am hoping I can muster up the courage to just talk it out, and not get all emotional.

    • That is good. I hope you get a chance to talk it out and work things out with him. That sucks he considers himself boring. True I think he is testing you out. That is good that you will not cheat on him. I hope he listens to what you got ro say. True maybe he slowed things down because he is boring. But still it's not right that he kind of changed things. Also think you for the upvote.

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