Starting to get really pissed off at my boyfriends sleeping habits?

Been together going on 5 years now and have lives together for 4 years. Its an everyday thing where he will go to bed around 11:30pm-1am every night, wake up around 12:30pm-1:30pm every day. Then take a nap around 3-4pm and sleep until dinner around 6pm. He sleeps legit all the fucking time. We never spend time together anymore because he would rather sleep instead. He rarely ever works anymore either so I am left in charge of all of our finances.
He has been to the doctor (which I forced because I thought something was wrong because of how much he sleeps). The doctor has done over 18 sleep tests so far because I have pushed for them, completely unsatisfied when they say they find no problem at all while he is sleeping and that he overall sleeps deeply. However, our last trip was to a very high up sleep doctor who is number 1 in the US. This doctor pulled me aside and said there is absolutely nothing wrong with him aside from the fact that he is lazy and has no ambition.
Given this fun fact, I decided to try and make him go out and do things that HE enjoys doing. Like go karting, amusement parks, camping, etc. He always turns them down. I told him I was getting fed up with his sleeping patterns because he never gives me the time of day anymore and he brushes it off like I am overexaggerating. I've done everything I could possibly think of on my own. What can I do?


0|0
9|10

Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds like he's seeing the wrong doctors. It also sounds a lot like a major depressive disorder. But then again it could be medically related such as having a bad thyroid. It could be a lot of things medically related or it could also be drugs. But one thing it's not and that's normal.

    3|1
    0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • I would have thought there was something medically wrong with him as well. If he has been to tons of doctors and he doesn't seem to have a medical condition, then he might be depressed, for which he would need to see a psychologist.
    Your boyfriend is not concerned? Or what does he think about it? And when did all this start?

    2|0
    0|0
    • He's always been like this. He can fall asleep with the drop of a hat. When he's awake he's happy go lucky. Its just that he refuses to stay awake. Even if he isn't tired he will go lay down. He will use excuses like "I was up all night", but that's not factual. The only reason I know that is because I have a full security system in my house and it has shown him dead asleep all through the night.

    • Oh ok.
      And does he think it's normal? Has he been like that since he was a kid as well?

What Guys Said 9

  • You can only see so many doctors and have so many tests. Being a lazy fuck is a very legitimate diagnosis. That is what I see. Many people out there are just lazy fucks! With those sleeping hours, he must not work. You are under no obligation to fix him. If you are not happy with him, and he is not contributing financially to the relationship, I fear your relationship is doomed. Remember, love doesn't pay the bills. It isn't fair you have work and make all the money while he sleeps in and naps every day.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Break up. No matter what his problem is, he's not a good partner to you. He's contributing about nothing. You can get that from any guy.

    1|1
    0|0
  • Well calling him lazy with no ambition is not the way to solve the issue. Sounds like he is depressed more then anything. If you are confrontational that only makes him not want to be around you more so that is actually counter to what you want. Figure out why he feels the way he does and try to fix the problem. If that doesn't work then leave its really that simple.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yeah, get another boyfriend. You are not his mother. You don't have to work and feed him.

    In fact, get someone who has a job and is really busy working but still save some time for fun. Make sure the guy has a really really mundane but realistic dream.

    2|0
    0|0
  • I'm seriously legit jealous I wish I could sleep that much.

    1|0
    0|0
  • When I get depressed, I tend to sleep more and be a little more lazy, you should get him to get a job, since part of the reason I get depressed is that I have nothing to do sometimes. If that doesn't work, tell him to get his shit together of you are leaving.

    1|0
    0|0
  • All your boyfriend needs is some sort of goal besides staying with you (which I'm suprized he succeeding) so that means like don't make him do stuff he has to find out on his own but the most you can do is give him some sort of wake up call (that doesn't mean actually wake him up I mean like open his eyes to the real world).

    2|0
    0|0
  • I think the question you should be asking is what is wrong with you that you're in a relationship with such a loser? Why does he spend all his time sleeping? Because he he can. What can you do? Break up with him, kick him out, and never look back.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Leave him an find someone better he seems like a lazy worthless person

    1|2
    0|0

What Girls Said 8

  • dump him, but 5 years is a lot of investment time put in. You can really let him know that you understand he loves his sleeps, and sleep is good for you but the problem is... he sleeping so much is making it a lot less fun for you. Plus you'd think that if he got a cool job, it might make him a happier person and a person that would have money to help with the finances. good luck

    1|1
    0|0
  • Change doctors. Stop looking for sleep disorder, and start looking for a psychiatric, psychological, or metabolic disorder.
    Otherwise, if it really is just sheet laziness, drop the tosser.

    2|2
    0|0
  • I'm surprised you got him to go to the doctor.
    He doesn't seem worried about his life or condition at all. I would think he would feel drousy and restless by sleeping that much. It's like he only wakes up to eat!

    1|0
    0|0
    • That's exactly what it is. He will wake up long enough to eat dinner and lose himself in a video game and then go back to bed.

  • He sounds like a lazy ass and needs to get a job and stop living off of you.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Maybe he is depressed

    0|0
    0|0
  • Sounds like a great boyfriend.

    jk.

    Leave him.

    0|1
    0|0
  • He should see a doctor in all seriousness

    0|0
    0|0
    • He's been to 8 different doctors now.

  • There's nothing you can really do. It's down to him. Like you can't force him out, he has to do these things, he just isn't willing. It's either put up with it and hope he changes, or kick his ass out.

    1|1
    0|0
Loading...