He says he's not ready to "settle down" because he wants to work on himself first. I just wanted to take our relationship to the bf/gf level. Meaning?

He says he's not ready to "settle down" because he wants to work on himself first. I just wanted to take our relationship to the bf/gf level. We're exclusively dating, but he's not ready for providing me with a full blown committment (i. e. feeling obligated to text me daily, etc.)

Does this mean he sees me as someone he wants to settle down with?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Why? Do you want to settle down? Its nice that he has goals that he wants to pursue before he settles down, if he's sincere about them. However, if he's beating around the bush, his efforts towards his goals should be quite visible. You can decide then. In the meantime, why don't you too pursue something? It should take your mind off your boyfriend, give each other space at the same time. Don't fret too much. If he wants to settle down, he'll be pretty obvious about it.

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    • I think he's sincere about his goals, and where he wants to be down the road. I think maybe he feels inadequate, because he sees that I have a full time career, goals, etc. Job security, etc. And he's not quite there yet. He said I'm special because I have my life together, and he finds it super attractive.

      I guess I just need to find more active hobbies.

      Thanks for this 😀

    • Yeah. Sure thing.

What Guys Said 1

  • No. It's the opposite. He sees you as someone he doesn't want to settle down with

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