I'm 21. Let me start by saying I have been taught to believe I deserve the best and shouldn't give myself to others so easily. I've dated around with plenty of guys the past few years. It almost always ends the same... They go crazy for me, talk to me nonstop, take me out.. And then we get intimate and I say no to anything further than making out (after one date, or a couple weeks) and then they get all pouty. I go home after a bit, and voilà they never call me again. I was seeing this guy and we would make out everytime we saw each other which was a whopping 2 times in a matter of a week, and then when I wouldn't give him head or have sex with him, he called me a tease and said I wasn't interested in him.
I partially also feel like guys sexualize me, and they think I'm more sexually experienced because of my physical attributes than I actually am. I'm well aware I have an attractive body and face, but it's like guys don't want to know me on a deeper level than that. Like, I don't deserve to be known deeper than my physical appearance because that's all anyone sees of me; if they wanted a relationship it would be with someone else. I "turn heads but not hearts" or whatever. And they blame me and try to make me feel guilty... I'm just kinda sad because I really put myself out there emotionally and then get torn apart by guys just because they don't view me anymore worthy than a one night stand and a joy ride. Meh, maybe that's all I do have to offer. It's made me close up to every guy I encounter now too. So if I do meet a genuine guy, I wouldn't know because I'm so closed off and sad.
Most Helpful Guy
look at it this way. guys r looking to tick boxes. as soon as u tick a box he progresses to find out more about u. if a box is missing he probably won't want to continue the relationship since his checklist isn't being met. sex is either no.1 or no.2 on a guy's checklist. if u dont tick that box within an acceptable period of time he is just gonna move on bc his time is being wasted. but if u tick the box early he will progress the realtionship to tick other boxes and build upon a good foundation for your relationship. sex is like a foundation tick box. u can't build the relationship without first building the foundation. yes guys want to go deeper but won't even consider that unless u meet some primary criteria. for me personally, i wouldn't wait more than 3 dates for sex.1
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Most Helpful Girl
It will take time, trust me. Dating at your age is really frustrating, because most people are not looking for anything serious. It's usually because at your age, it's a very transitional time for people. Many are in school, and are moving frequently. That is why sex is so high on the priority list right now.
However, you will find a guy eventually who will want to get to know you on a deeper level. Just try to be patient, even though it's really hard to wait so long!
Try to focus more on meeting people and less on finding a relationship. Try to keep busy with friends, the right guy will find you eventually.1