Today I was at a drugstore and this blonde tacky girl who works there, decided to follow me around cause she thought I was stealing. I smiled at her and she kept looking dirty at me, she takes her collegeau with her and decided to follow me around, I decided to stay classy and just walk away, I am SICK AND TIRED of the racism, I live down south in Holland and the racism is just getting too much, they keep making comments at workplace, its hard to make friends, I lived here for 23 years and stil can't seem to make friends easily while I am a friendly person. I also dont want to move away because im dont move for others. Or should I just go? I am a black woman by the way, maybe she was just jealous of my looks , she has never seen a pretty black girl before.
Most Helpful Guy
I cannot say too much about your situation because I am not there to see it. But I can tell you about mine.
I am from Amsterdam. But I have also lived in UK, Germany, Canada and now Spain. I can tell you right now that in terms of racism Holland is the best place to be.
Me being adopted into a white family gave me the chance to live in two different worlds. I know how black and white people think and what they say about each other. Most of it is incorrect. And most of the time it's because of ignorance and fear. Once a 72 year old woman asked me how I got those curls in my hair, completely not understanding that we are born that way. Racism? no. Ignorance? yes?
I have come across racism everywhere I have been but I always take it as a challenge to show that person that whatever he/she is thinking he/she is wrong. Most of the time I succeed. You could put me at a meeting of the KKK but at the end of the meeting they will all love me. That's my attitude. I'm not talking about sucking up. I'm talking about staying classy like you did and showing people a different side. You may not see the result of it right now but the effects will be seen some day.
There are however also other situations when there is no racist attempt but it's still seen as racism. For example. That person might not think a black girl was stealing something but instead just thought a girl was stealing something.
I have black friends who often think about racism and somehow always run into racism. While the ones that don't think about it never/almost never run into it. I think once you put in into your mind you will come across it and visa versa.0
Most Helpful Girl
What a lot of people do not realize in life is this: we get what we focus our energy on.
Everyone is going to get disrespected in their life. EVERYONE.
Racism is a form of disrespect. When a person is disrespected, because of their race, their religion, their sexuality, their looks, their income, their height, their political views, their etc etc etc, if that person then chooses to focus a lot on how they were disrespected, repeatedly tells the story of how they were disrespected THEN they will attract more & more disrespect into their life experience.
So what's the solution? The solution is to forgive & let it go in the moment that it happens. Understand that the person doing the disrespecting is doing so from a place of ignorance/fear/pain. So let your "ruffled feathers" relax. Then turn your attention to people who DO respect you. Focus your energy on those occasions where you were treated well. When you think about those people, those occasions... it feels good, yes? Then that is your sign that you are going in the right direction. And the more your focus on people respecting you, the more you will attract respect into your life. Not saying the disrespect will go away completely, but it will get better & better the more you do this.0