ok so, i'm 22, i am not shy i'm actually outgoing. and i also have lots of self confidence, some people even think im a total douchebag. i'm in great shape, girls look at me everywhere i go and all of that. i'm so good looking, i even get catcalled by immature (or drunk) girls sometimes.
but the problem is i dont know anything about talking to girls. i dont know what is showing too much interest or too little interest, trying too hard or not trying hard enough. i dont know when to act nice and when to act like myself (which is kind of mean and douchebaggy sometimes). i talk about myself a lot until i get the message in my head that says "ask her about herself".
you can say that i've only had "something" with 2 girls, who were the only girls i've slept with which was only a few times. i'm certain people wonder about me and think i'm gay which i am not in any way.
and i just can't seem to understand why guys who i look so much better than them from every aspect, have NO problem getting a BEAUTIFUL girl. and even sometimes if i do get a good looking girls number, she will completely ignore me.
i'm sure people who dont know me well see me as a great looking confident guy, who is funny and all of that, and who has no problem getting a girlfriend. nothing can be further from the truth.
You're not having much success with girls because it sounds like you're relying on your supposed good lucks to be enough to get you there. Which in reality, is far from the truth. Good looks will not make you a good boyfriend, someone a girl feels like she can trust and relate to. Start focusing on improving your game, making yourself more approachable than being nothing more than some eyecandy.
Sweetie, seems like deep down you don't feel as confident as you look. Despite the "wow" effect you have on people, you're still feeling like you don't know what you're doing. People have issues, and their fickle manner can unintentionally wear down your self esteem. Stop seeking validation through people's reaction to your looks, and get satisfaction from making emotional connections with people that think like you. People you can relax around. Be yourself. Although it helps to do less talking, you need someone equally assertive that can hold their own. A lot of people just don't have that *extra something*.
I have a mainstream personality where I hold back, watch what I say, stick with safe subjects. This is with 90% of girls and guys I meet. My true personality is with immediate family, and the rare persona, with empath/HSP traits where I reveal my true self to that person, joke about anything, say whats on my mind. I'm not afraid they're going to judge me or whatever. I'm extremely outgoing and crave social interaction, with no ulterior motives whatsoever. Just kidding. I have plenty.
It's possible that you're a douchebag that only talks about himself. Or you could be an extremely outgoing person with so much passion to expel that its a bit too intense for most people. Maybe... just maybe you're having trouble finding people like you. You should take some quizzes to see if you're HSP--> especially the extroverted kind. They consist of like 15-20% of the population and their brains are actually wired a little differently than most folks. And read my question I posted on here. I want to know what you think. I used to think I was an alien species or something, like what happened to people who know how to have a conversation?
Or, you could just be a douchebag. Lol. Just kidding.
because personality does matter just be yourself imagine them as your friends maybe then it will come more natural
Probably you should start with "I talk about myself a lot," maybe? Maybe you should find a balance between talking about your self and inquiring about the other person? Because as much as you like talking about yourself, the other person is probably the same too. With that, I believe it would open up a more comfortable atmosphere between you and whoever you are trying to talk to.