Is chemistry instant or can be built over time?

I have always been a firm believer that you have to fancy someone from the get go and chemistry is something that you instantly feel. However, all of the guys I have felt this with have been not very nice guys and it's never worked.

i have a date tomorrow with a guy that I get on with but I'm not sure I fancy him in that way yet. He's nice enough and he is good looking but I'm just not sure I'm attracted to him. Can chemistry/ attraction develop over time? Or is it an instant thing?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • lol, i thought you meant the subject. it can be built over time i guess. i know many people who rejected a dude or girl for a long time and then even got married. or they fight, but date and love each other (at least they don't break up).

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Most Helpful Girl

  • The best relationship of my life has come from a man I wasn't initially "swept away" by, looks wise that is. I didn't see him and immediately think, "damn." Like yeah he was aesthetic, but I was in a relationship so I didn't think too much.
    After I had broken up with my boyfriend at the time and gotten together with my current boyfriend (the best relationship that I've ever ever had) and it took about 2 months before I just sat back and realized, holy fuck, this is the most attractive man I have ever seen. 😍 to this day, he makes me fucking melt.

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What Guys Said 2

  • For me, it's instant since every girl I've "dated" or whatever the fuck you wanna call it thus far... I knew we'd be together from the moment we talked for about 20 mins.

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  • Depends on the situation.
    It's kinda interesting and cute to have chemistry from the beginning but it's not required, it can build over time when the couple get to know each other better.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I know its odd but it can grow. The last 2 of my exs. We started as friends so i didn't see them that way. But the more i trew to know them. The more i grew feelings x

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