Do you see yourself dating a feminist?

Okay i thought about this whole equality situation and some women looking down on women roles in our community and they think that to be respected you have to be a man and traditional female roles are dumb and degrading ( they are not ) and i've decided that iam not interested in such BS in my life so i dont want to date a girl who identifies herself as feminist , they are dumb , a headache and have unrealsitic views and degrade men and woman , they dont want to clean, cook, take care of kids, do the house chores or any woman realted things because they believe its degrading ( its really not , all guys need their moms and wives its a fact ) so i decided that i want a feminine female who embraces her femininity and doesn't act like a dude , if this offends you remember its my own opinion and you dont have to agree... so what do you think?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree with you.
    And that doesn't mean I can't earn, or don't want to earn either. But I want my man to be the man, and for me to help aid in a way that he decides is best for our family. I think I'd even enjoy working, but never at the expense of my marriage and children.

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    • so many women find it hard to admit that they want a man to be a man and then they get mad when he starts acting like a pussy , you are like my ex girlfriend ( we broke up becasue she went to another state for school by the way ) she wants a career and everything but has no problem admitting to wanting a true man and a family to care of , i would like to see more girls like you , who are genuine.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Never. Not in a God damn century. Not if she was the hottest chick who ever lived who was interested in me. Okay, I might fuck her if she wanted that, but I sure as hell wouldn't date her.

    Though, it depends. I spoke with what seemed to be a very hardcore feminist last year, online. And she was vehement, I'm telling you. I made my points, she called me a dick-loving misogynist, and this past week, I stumbled across a post from her saying "I'm not a feminist." I was shocked. Like wtf. I said "didn't I have a pretty heated conversation with you last year about feminism?" She ignored the question, but I like to think that I helped aid her decision by making well formed points that one can be pro gender equality and still not be a feminist or be an anti feminist.

    I was the same way for a long time. I always believed feminism simply meant equality for women. I was ignorant of the ins and outs. No one could tell me anything, because it was common knowledge that feminism = equality, and if you are against feminism, you're against equality and against women. Then I stumbled across Karen Straughan and went with a big "... Oh... well shit." I had been completely ignoring myself and all other men's issues. My focus had been entirely on making everything better for females, maintaining the same stance that men should be able to handle any issue that comes along, never need help or societal understanding, or they're not men. But, all it took was one video from Karen to change my mind. So I would try.

    So. I would try to talk to her rationally about all the points, have her watch some videos from women who know a thing or two, like Straughan, and if she still persevered and would not drop the feminism label, I would never date her ever.

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    • That said, I'd want a partner. Not a maid. There is a difference between a feminist woman and a traditional woman. A feminist woman could be a traditional woman.

What Girls Said 47

  • I agree it's not degrading to do cooking and cleaning etc. I think it's making the point that as a man, if we 'keep traditional gender roles' you have to get a job. But, that job can be whatever you want, you can choose to follow any career path you wish to. You can follow your dreams and do something you love everyday.
    Whereas, if your 'role' is to cook and clean but you've always wanted to be an engineer or an artist or whatever, and you can't follow that dream because it's not your 'role in life'. So you can't follow your dreams and ambitions.
    It's not the actual cooking and cleaning that is degrading, they are the motifs for the idea that you can never be who you wanted to, because you have the wrong sexual organs...
    So for feminists, I think what they're trying to say is, it's a 1 in 2 chance you get to have your career and your choice of how to pass everyday. It's also a 1 in 2 chance you can't because your job isn't to choose a career, but to sit on your dreams and never complete them...
    That's how I would interpret it anyway...

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    • i have no problem with a girl having a career but she also should be a housewife even if just partialy , all women i know who have a job , do all their house work and go to work or when they get home they take care of all the house work , they realise its been like this for ages and they know its a responsibility they have to take care of their family , as a man i do want to live a comfy life and chill all the time but i know that it won't work i have to work hard to make money and take care of my family and i dont mind , really its my job and i accept it even if i dont get to follow some of my dreams , life is not always fair so why do women think its all unicorns and rainbows? iam realsitic why can't people be realsitic and know that some dreams are not meant to happen

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    • @coulditbebutter Noticed how she attacked my statements aggressively, before any mention of china occured? Notice how she used American and men as a aggressive term or insult again, this was prior to any mention of china. So you are in fact wrong on this particular point and you can even go back through and look at what was written if you do not believe me. Now, she only appologized after I called her behavior out which was exceptable, except she continued to behave in the same fashion as she did prior. She also stated that she did not wish for a groups suffering to go on in silence yet attacked me when I pointed out that it was not just women who where suffering. Further more being born in a country does not make you more knowledgable about things. Most people in america still believe that they live in a democracy (its a constitutional republic) and they still believe that women where oppressed (despite all evidence to the contrary) the fact is, I was pointing out hte more probable

    • @coulditbebutter out come of events, one that did not presume the guilt of all men, that did not presuppose the sociopathic tendencies of an entire group, to claim that they where devoid of any real sense of morality and justice but rather a simple misunderstanding do to the limitations of ones experiences. When someone tells me an entire group of people are evil (you must believe that to think that men oppress and abuse women irregardless of relations ie mothers sisters wives daughters) then yes I am going to contest that. Its counter intuitive and counter to all known facts and I will happily provide you with any data that you need in order to prove that point (though to be honest no one likes to read them because the lie is so much more convient then the truth, that is that men are humans just like women instead of the monsters we as a society like to portray them as.)

  • Feminism has nothing to do with shaming a traditional lifestyle, it's about letting women choose what they want to do with their life. So instead of being forced to stay at home and cook/clean/take care of the kids, women get the choice to prioritize other things. Such as their education and career. The choice is the important part. Traditional gender roles are bad when they're imposed and you're forced to follow them. If you want that for yourself then fine, but don't force anyone to think like you or follow your standards.
    Also, femininity has nothing to do with cooking and cleaning. They are life skills that everyone benefit from learning and honestly, if you don't know how to clean up after yourself or cook some of the most basic things, then you suck at life. You should not need a woman to do all these things for you your entire life. I'd prefer it if my husband and I could divide the chores at home so that neither of us would have to do everything on our own.

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    • iam sorry i am planning to be a man not woman and i have no problem with a girl pursuing her education but she is going to be taking care of the house not me , I don't know how to and i was not raised to and iam not intereted in any house work , i want a traditional girl and they do exist iam looking for them , iam not looking for a girl who thinks she's another dude

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    • This entire thread is gold. Thank you so much! @9mfeo @redeyemindtricks @lumos

  • Personally, I find it rather strange that you'd put your welfare and living comforts at the complete mercy of another. How can that be considered masculine, or even adult? Also, how hard would it be to wash the dishes or take out the trash? Even if your wife didn't work, she can't be there for you all the time. She could fall sick too, or need to be away to visit her family. Besides, wouldn't not taking care of your kids AT ALL make you an absentee father? Or a distant one at best, because your bond with them won't be significant if you're not there to handle the little ups and downs of life with them.

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    • How hard is it for a woman to buy her own meals (men still pay for dates about 80% of the time), her own jewelery (for instance valentines day men spend twice as much on their significant other then women do)? How hard is it for a woman to romance a man instead of expecting him to buy her flowers wine and dine her prepare a candle lit dinner for her etc? See it goes both ways, women want a whole lot from men and historicly women provided just as much for them. But now men are still expected to do all of this for a woman and she is expected to. . . take all of it while bashing him for being a sexist pig. As he pointed out he was fine with the roles being the way they where ie he works ridicoulous hours to put his family first and all he expects of her is to do the same, seems like a fair trade to me.

    • @hellionthesage Okay, first of all, just where do you get the statistics for meal-paying and jewelry-buying? Does it also state how many men actually WANT to do all those things out of pride? Also, if you look at his other comments, he mentions seeing women working jobs and doing all the chores as the norm. That's not exactly an equal distribution of work if you ask me.

  • I'm a feminist and more than happy to stay home and keep house and cook and whatever else needs to be done. I don't want kids because I'd be a terrible parent, but I'll take care of cats.

    Feminism is about choice and respect. As in we need to respect women's individual choices and respect the work everyone does. Don't come home to an immaculate house and a beautiful dinner and then ask the woman who did that all for you what she did all day while insisting that you're tired from working all day. Her work is as valuable as yours.

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    • I might have guessed, it is a blessing that you don't wants kids.

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    • *shrug* I only know what I read on Tumblr about American news media.

    • @9mfeo LMFAO

  • I will only date a male feminist/egalitarian.
    I don't mind doing some cleaning and I actually love to cook, but if a guy expects me to do all of that because "that's my place" and refuses to help out, we're not dating.
    It's fine if he admits there are a few domestic things he's not good at; I can teach him. Or if there are a few things he just plainly dislikes, if he hates laundry I'll do that, but he should be willing to vacuum instead. It's about an equal partnership. I plan to work as much as my husband and bring in an equal income, so he should be okay with working as much as me around the house.
    If I was unemployed at some point or chose to leave work to take care of kids, then yes, I'd pick up more household chores. But I would also expect the same from him if the situation were reversed.

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    • so whos the man?

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    • @hellionthesage Just read the interaction again. If you really don't get it, I'm not sure I have the reservoir of experience to explain it to you. But, trust me, pretty much 99 percent of the world is going to "misunderstand yr intent" in exactly the same way.

      The proper response, on yr part, is "This woman is a nice example of what I'd like to see more of, in the world."

      That's the correct response.

      Yr response was pretty much exactly the opposite of that.

      Just study that. Study it. If you have to just flat-out memorize that kind of response, then just flat-out memorize it.

      Your approach (throwing a bunch of statistics at ppl) will do nothing except annoy, alienate, or both.

      Trust me.

    • @redeyemindtricks Again, I think you misunderstand me both in my intent and in what I want. I made a point because you said you didn't function in said way I pointed out that this does not mean that it isn't true for the general population, but rather is ancedotal. Now however you meant it the fact is it did not translate into your statement (the failing of the written word I'm afraid) the tone and context did not carry, now I did not state anything that was disrespectful in the slightest, you then went on a rant about how I am alienating people from my "cause"(unless truth is the cause, i don't know what you meant by that). Again, I think perhaps you should consider the possiblity that you did not clarify your statement well enough and that we perhaps had a miscomunication (perfectly understandable) instead of attempting to belittle me.

  • I am a feminst, because I believe that women are objectified and deserve to be valued based on more than our appearance. I am a mother, with a sexy ass boyfriend. We both take care of our son, we both clean, I do it more often because I work less. I don't know, there's not really anything different in our relationship compared to previous relationships I've had before being a feminist. My boyfriend doesn't consider himself a feminist as I do not believe men can be feminists because it is not a movement for men. He is happy to be with a sexy girl who is intelligent enough to analyze media/society. We have a great life and have wild sex. I don't know why it would be different from a different relationship. I honestly think feminists have more tools to turn down shady guys who try to hit on me and stuff. Before I was a feminist, I cheated on my ex because I had a hard time saying no. Just my take. But I would rather be with a guy who isn't threatened by my political views, so make sure you tell women how you're threatened by feminism so that women can stay far away.

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    • Does he want to marry you? Do you want to marry him?

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    • @redeyemindtricks just saw this but yeah we are going to get married.

    • 21d

      no man is ever "threatened" by feminism, we just look down on the movement and anyone who follows it, feminism is quite laughable and its not worth investing time into someone who believes in something that is so stupid and wrong on so many levels.

  • I still don't understand what being a feminist and not doing housework have to do with each other lol.

    What kind of person, male or female, wouldn't take care of their kids, wouldn't clean up after themselves and doesn't at least know how to cook or order some food for basic survival?

    If you as a man haven't managed to do those things for yourself at this point then you need a mother still, not a wife.

    Also for the record, I believe in equality, I don't give a fck what it's called, I clean up my own house, I take care of my family members and cook very well but i'm not traditional at all.

    Stop telling people they have to be a certain way, there are so many different aspects to a person and you just end up sounding lazy and ignorant.

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  • Lol I love when anti-feminists attempt tp describe feminism. It's like Fox News threw up all over a screen.

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    • and its not important that you dont care, men are very very used to that from women. I am indifferent to your lack of caring.

    • @Grisbosque My dear old man, if you do not understand sarcasm, you may get off of my thread. You failed to understand that my opinion was sarcastic. Strike one. Then you failed to understand that you were being dismissed as an old crazy person. Goodbye.

  • the problem is that you don't even know what feminism is about and you already judge it. what you said is completely wrong.
    'they dont want to clean, cook, take care of kids, do the house chores or any woman realted things because they believe its degrading' - this is not true, it's about choice. The point is if woman wants to do that things she can, if she doesn't want to, she doesn't have to, if partners decide to split that work they split the work... the point is not to expect that woman is the one doing that work but rather that we are all individual human beings and we are free to do what we want. Same goes with men, if a guy wants to be stay at home da, he can. Its about being happy by doing what you love and not what society says certain gender should do. The only way to be happy is to be ysf and feminism is about giving you that freedom. If you want traditional woman, that's ok, but don't judge other girls that are not like that, we are all different.

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    • i want her to and iam not marrying a woman who doesn't want to , you were born a woman so be one

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    • I said the only thing it's true is physical part where men are stronger that sure is a fact but as far as skills go it's not about gender. But there is no such a thing as you say how women are and how men are. Your experience might have been like that but that is mostly just the concpet made and promoted by society. You shouldn't be feminine or masculin, being a girl or a guy, the point is that you have to be ysf! When people tell me I should act like a lady and I do I feel miserable cause that is not how I am in my nature and you can only be happy if you are yourself! That is the whole point! People are so unhappy for having to project some kind of role of their gender when all they wanna be is themselves! I would say you don't have much experience with women cause if you did you would now things are not like you say women are. I've only met like 2 guys that are more daring than me, think about that and I've been told men are 'brave', bullshit, it's not a gender thing.

    • and why would feminine be downgrading? many men are weak, emotionally fragile, sensitive and that is ok! That is what feminism says! It's ok for men to cry, it's ok for women to go to army etc. Be ysf! It's ok for women to be stay at home mom and it's ok for guys to work and support family! Whatever you prefer! Whatever you decide with your partner! If you are traditional man, that's ok, but many are not and that's ok too!

  • Well, I don't identify as a feminist, but here's the thing: my partner and I both work fulltime, and if I had to do all the cleaning and cooking, because he saw it as 'my place', the relationship would be over very quickly. Living together is about sharing responsibilities, not having the woman do everything because she is a woman.
    Luckily for me, my boyfriend can actually take care of himself, and we share all the housework equally, because he is a man, not a baby who needs me to be his mother.

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    • thats where you're mistaken where icome from men dont do that , yeah sure every dude i know can take care of himself but once you start vacumming and making the bed , that instantly makes you weak and girly

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    • and for that parpticular reason the divorce rates in america are rising steadily and men and women both cheat on each other.

    • No. A lot of factors contribute to that, like the social acceptability of divorce, rushing into marriage, the current need for perfection in relationships, etc. But women working and not being housewives is one of them. If we didn't work alongside husbands and partners, then no couple would ever be able to afford a house, a family, a car.
      Now, if you want a housewife to baby you, that's fine. Go and find one. But you can't claim that that's how women are supposed to act, because that's simply not your decision.

  • Many weak-minded men just want a house maid with none of her own aspirations in life so he doesn't have to feel intimidated, so I wouldn't expect anything better of you anyway :)

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    • that would've worked if you knew me but you dont so iam not getting your point...

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    • Get a dog if you want to "lead someone" that's sick and not how you treat a human being regaurdless of gender.

    • 22d

      we don't feel intimidated by women, since we are by default better than you, however we often don't deal with women who has a high status career (because regardless of how she got there, sucking dick or quotation etc) she will still only consider dating men who have even higher status than her.

  • I would and if a guy told he was against feminism or something, I'd be concerned

    Feminism was always been about the right to choose how live your life, either having a career or working at home. It hasn't always been that way, so don't take it for granted.

    And I agree staying at home is looked down in our society. It's a rather patriarchal mindset, not counting the jobs women do at home as real jobs that deserve recognition as well.
    So that's why a lot of girl are hesitant to do that, because they don't feel like they're being valued. And then of course another big part is that guys these don't live up their part of the deal.

    Typically the same men that want women to clean and cook are overgrown children that fear commitment and responsibility.
    And I get men don't want the responsibility they used to have, it's tough, I get it. But then don't go around whining how you can't find a traditional woman. First ask yourself what do you bring to the table? Can your provide for a family financially and emotionally? Will you put them first?
    You said in a comment even if both of you work full time you'd expect her to do all the housework, so what exactly do you bring to the table in that scenario? It's not money, she has her own. You're not helping around the house, with kids if you had any. And let's face it she can sex and intimacy anywhere. So again, what are you good for?

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    • Your 3rd paragraph is spot on true. 👍

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    • 1- i never mentioned anything about not doing any work , in fact i did say i was ready to work long hours to provide with my family even if my wife works as well , 2-we are men not pussies , only pussie let their wives control them , yes i do respect women and like them and want to give my future wife my best , but for the most part iam the man of the house and will by no means accept another man in the house , you dont like it? you find it backwards? well i dont think iam able to give a fuck even if i wanted , i find it hard to believe that you want to marry a pussy , and while a mans job is to respect his wife, provide for her and treat her well, communicate with her and make her feel like a true woman , it can only be done if he is the man , i disagree with men who oppress their wives, dont let them go anywhere or hang out with their friends or leave the house alone, and i won't do that , however iam going to be the man and the only one in my house , if you dont like it leave it.

    • so how many hours do you work a week?

      What you're saying is, she'd work the standard 39 hours a week and additionally 10 hours a week at home without children, or let's say 30 with children. So you would work 49 hours or 69 hours at your workplace respectively?

  • I couldn't see myself dating a NON feminist.

    The definition of the word feminism: is someone who believes that woman and men should have equal rights.

    I would not date someone who believes I should not have the same rights as men.

    My mom is a feminist, but she still raised me and my brothers, dose the cooking, and the cleaning.
    But do you know what else she can do? She can vote, she can get a job and be payed as much as a man, she can wear whatever she wants, and if she wanted to she could divorce my dad.

    You saying you don't want to date a feminist is saying you don't want to date someone who wants control over their own life.

    So if you don't think women should want to have equal rights to men... Then that's your opinion and I respect that... but I don't respect you.

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    • your mom is by no means a feminist , she is a caring housewife... some threatining with sex and some with divorce do you even understand how life works?

    • Asker, you clearly don't know what a feminist is.

  • I am a feminist, egalitarian and men's rights activist. I see no point in identifying with one thing and being a stereotype.
    I do believe that when you share your life with someone and move in with them you also share the responsibilities with that person. House work is not a girly thing or something that only women should do, because house work is a necessary evil for everyone. I find many people look down upon stay at home mum and dads even though it's a full time job to do laundry, make dinner, vacuum, sweep, mop, clean and potentially take care of kids.
    Not all feminists hate the thought of touching a dish rag because they fear that means they're being oppressed in some way. I'm very much a home body, I take pride in my home and keep it clean and tidy, but I also study and have two jobs. There needs to be a balance.
    If I started living with a guy and I was expected to do everything in terms of caring for him (laundry, food etc...) and he contributed nothing because 'it's a womans' place to take care of the house and him' I would be out of that door in seconds.
    Short answer, I would only date someone who identified as egalitarian or feminist, none of this complete and utter disregard for a womans right to be seen as something other than a maid and a way to get laid. If he was purely a MRA who believed men were superior to women no way I would date him, but if he was standing up for the rights of men that's fine by me.

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  • Well I consider myself as a feminist, but I'm not the kind that goes overboard. I know what you mean, there are feminists that do degrade men and women. I can only speak for myself, I do believe that women can do the same things as men. Personally I'm not the stay at home clean up and cook type, but I do believe that things should be 50/50 between a man and a woman. Not saying that I won't clean and cook, because I love to clean. I'm just saying I'm more of a working woman. If you get what I mean. If a woman wants to stay home and clean, cook, watch the kids, than that's her decision. I don't look down on anyone. I just believe that women should be equal to men.

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    • Wanna clean my apartment for me? Pretty please with a cherry on top?

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    • @9mfeo lol you gonna pay me

    • Of course not. Your husband wouldn't pay you to do it. If you *love* to clean, you would do it out of the goodness of your heart. 😘

  • Yes, in fact, I'm dating one right now :)

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  • I wouldn't date a feminist, or at least not a crazy one. My view on feminism is that in America women are already equal. If you want to fight for women's rights in the Middle East or somewhere where women are not equal, then I think that's amazing. I think that some of American women's feminist arguments are absolutely ridiculous. Yes, women should be able to do what they want, but we already have that ability. We can trash talk men and men can trash talk us, who gives a crap.

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  • I do the cooking and half the cleaning in my relationship and I'm a feminist. I support equality for both genders. Both should be paid equally for equal work. Both can be raped, male and female sex offenders should be treated the same. Men should be awarded custody if they are the better parent and have changing stations in their bathrooms for their kids. Please don't lump all feminist together with femnatzis because we are very different

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  • I take feminism as a fight for equality and that we get to choose what we want to be and do and not what we should be. I have no problem cooking for the guy, but I want that to be my choice, because I like it, not because someone once thought women should not leave the kitchen. I'm more savy with the screwdriver than my guy... so I'll do that maybe, without making him feel bad, because he should be the man and do "manly" shit. So no, feminism is not about going against the roles out of spite, but about being able to do whatever, without being judged for it.

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  • I am a feminist and extremely feminine... and I don't believe any of those things are degrading I just believed they shouldn't be forced onto someone on the basis of their genitalia you know?
    I've literally never met a feminist who believe those things. Feminism must be different where you're at.

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  • i do want to date someone who doesn't believe women are inferior to men.

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    • 22d

      But it doesn't matter what anyone believes, its indisputable fact that men are superior to women.

  • Erm I'm not saying this because I'm offended.
    I totally agree that doing house chores, cooking and all the other things that are steroitipically viewed as a woman's job is not degrading at all. Heck doing those things are great. BUT feminists not wanting to do any of those things and degrading them is NOT what feminism is about. This is how the media and society Fked up and misinterpreted feminist ideology just because some women are too impulsive and got the wrong idea. For example in the states some citizens think that ALL Muslims are terrorists just because SOME extremists use their religion as an excuse to be violent people got the wrong idea without thoroughly looking into the issue. My Friend is a Muslim and I was invited to spend the holidays with all his relatives once and I don't remember them blasting me up with a bomb. What I'm trying to say is that sometimes people don't fully look into the matter and just rely on some few terrible examples to figure out what something mean. True feminists would want their husbands to simply share the responsibilities of household chores, taking care of kids n things like that. So that they could have time to go after their own careers. In most cases women take all/most of those responsibilities that they have to give up their dreams of working or whatnot just cause they hold more responsibilities at home. So if both genders take equal responsibility at home both parties could work without the other sacrificing their dreams. This is just a simple (right) example of what a feminist wants. See it's not that bad. We women don't want to become men. We want men to just be fair. With all that said, i hope u find love with a girl who is or isn't a feminist. Good luck with ur life n spread the love :)

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  • I don't call myself anything but I believe anyone (man and woman) are free to choice whatever lifestyle they want to, whether it's staying at home with the kids or having a career without being judged nor looking down on others.

    Personally, if I were to settle down I would want to also work. I didn't spend 4 years going to college and finishing it for nothing.

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    • is free to choose

    • However, if I find that a man is expecting me to do all that just because I'm a woman (that seems to be the tone in your post) while he can careless about learning all that in case I'm not available at the moment, then we're going to have problems.

  • as long as she doesn't believe women need to rule the world, I'm fine

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  • No, I`m straight but would date a man into the MRA movement

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  • My boyfriend feels the same and I agree. Feminazis are the worst.

    I'm a bit off though. I give very little craps.

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  • Yea sure as long as we don't have a debate about it.

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  • Amen to that!

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  • Would never date a guy who had radical views on feminism

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  • I'd date a feminist but I wouldn't date an MRA.

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What Guys Said 83

  • i've dated feminists and married one. certainly never dated or married the "feminazi" types but just those that believe men and women are and should be equals

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    • Quite honestly I don't think that anyone likes radfems. They're very... How can I put this delicately... Shrill.

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    • 19d

      what i said is fact, it does not matter what you or I think, reality is as it has always been. And yes men deserve more respect because we contribute more to society as a whole and we are more capable.

    • 19d

      @alphadoggystyle what you said isn't fact. it's an opinion you hold. if that's your opinion then fine.

      women certainly deserve the same political and social rights as men in my opinion... and vice versa

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  • No I do not. I'd prefer an egalitarian. I'm not gonna marry someone who supports the #killallmen crew.

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    • Not all feminists support the "killallmen" bullshit.

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    • @GirlsLie
      send the feminist to change Isis.

    • @Grisbosque LOL that's a great idea actually, send the killallmen women to battle ISIS, take out two birds with one stone.

  • Sure. I married one.

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  • I think that your attitude is based on a perception that feminists are against traditional roles and values and believe that men should be relegated to unimportant roles in our society. There certainly are some women who embrace such radical views, but it is a minority of women. Most women think of feminism as insisting on equal rights under the law, equal pay for equal work, equal respect for their roles in society.

    It is possible to be a traditional female and still embrace this more realistic view of feminism, and it is certainly possible to be a traditional male and coexist peacefully with such a woman. I know because I am doing that. I treat her with dignity and respect, I open car doors for her, sit between her and the weirdo at the movie theatre, etc. She cooks, cleans the house, and does other chores that would be considered traditional female chores. She is an extremely intelligent woman, she is a retired judge, and a very warmhearted individual.

    Don't judge all feminists by the radical feminazis. That will only lead to looking at women as adversaries; that is antithetical to having a woman as a partner and you will deny yourself the many benefits of having an honest and equal relationship.

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  • Hell no lmao

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  • I would. Since feminism wants to give women the opportunity to decide if they want to follow traditional roles or not, It's completely valid.

    And I don't think any of these activities that you mentioned are degrading. For men or women. everyone should be able to do those by themselves so they won't be big babies that need to be taken care of.

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  • I dated a feminist once and it was awful. Not saying feminism is bad, because it's not. But some women use feminism to use against guys sometimes, just like in the relationship I was in.

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    • Did she make you walk over broken glass and hot ashes before she let you in bed.

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    • Yeah exactly, i knew this feminist on formspring and she is the most vile person i know, they are very quick to complain about sexist language but the disgusting language she uses agaisnt the disabled other people in general.

    • @TimeSplitters123 Spot on. So whenever a woman openly tells me she is a feminist, I block all communications with her before I get sucked into a vortex of my degrading self-esteem and humiliation :D

  • I think you're dumb. Are you saying mean can't do household chores? I don't think we are that incompetent. I feel like you just want a want a spouse who listens to you because you're a man. Honestly I'm disgusted that you are against equality. And you can say that I am making that up, but saying that they have unrealistic views and should stay in their place? Sickening. I would ammend your statement to say "you don't deserve any spouse".

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  • While im no fan of feminism. Its honestly not a "womans job" or work to clean the house. Say if both of you are working, then naturally both should help out in the house as well, its not females job that. Just old sterotypes that. If the girl is working and the guy is home then naturally he should be doing the housework too. And its not women related. I live alone in a house, Im not exactly having my mom over or something to clean for me, lol. Its my job to at least try not to make it look like a pit of satan, although now I want a satan pit. Great Doctor who episode, either way. You can live life however you want or whatever preference, but implying cleaning related stuff to be the womens work, is honestly pretty old fashioned, and kinda sexist.

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    • Also no, I can't imagine myself ever dating a feminist honestly.

  • I think this thread loosely defined the actual meaning of feminism and became more of battle sexes that makes us men look bad or dicks and some women hateful towards men due to a personal view or past experience of one person.

    Honestly, doing house chores is everyone's (living in that household) responsibility, kid's included. Not quite sure how being a feminist affects all that, but whatever.

    For the guys: If you ever lived on your own, who does all these chores, or do you still heavily rely on your parent's because you refuse to grow up, but claiming to be independent? If you are, then please grow up because they won't be around long.

    I cook and/or clean... shit doesn't prove I am less of a man - I cook to eat to survive; I clean because I refuse to live like a pig and I receive a high salary. A co-worker who is a female does exactly the same and receives the same salary... so?

    Point some of you tried to make is I make more money than you so do housework and I go lazy mode. Let's just say, if they receive higher earnings than you, aren't they just as "entitled" and not do shit when they get home? In a relationship, in modern society, it's shared. You living in the wrong era. This ain't the 50s, but feminism goes way back, 50s just made women conform with society's norm. I don't see no guy complaining if a feminist goes topless... they wanted equal rights, they got it... it's not fully there, but it's slowly happening.

    To some of the ladies that replied, half the answers given were just as convoluted as the TS, where one's femininity/masculinity or manhood/womanhood really had nothing to do with feminism. Only a handful of men and women answered appropriately, but got stuck to a specific subject of who should do what because of one man's perspective of the word and just tied it based on that alone perhaps from experience.

    Anyway, to answer your question, it wouldn't matter to me if she is a feminist, if I am into her and she's not an extremist of that movement, who tends to be a bit to crazy for my taste and whatever else comes with the territory.

    I don't want my woman to change me or my way of life, so what gives me the right to change their ways? Because I am the husband?

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  • As long as they aren't against having children, and don't think all men are inherently evil rapists governed by their penises and that women are day by day oppressed by all men at all times, I don't see a problem with it.

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  • damn d00d, playin' it rough on the first hand lol.

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  • No way! I'm all for gender equality, but I wouldn't want to be around (much less date) anyone obnoxious and manly-girls.

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  • No, not ever. If somebody's gonna yell at me every time I say women don't belong in the military and won't acknowledge that although there is some flexibility, men and women do have different roles, and although negotiation and discourse is always the first option the husband is the final executive in a marriage, then that's a deal breaker.

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    • As a current, Active Duty United States Sailor, FUCK YOU. That is all.

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    • women do belong in the military, feminists first next D day...

      in fact they should draft feminists before men until the battlefield reflects national gender demographics!

      "You go! Girl!" ( assault that machine gun position or get shot for disobeying orders)

      feminists do not want equality, they want things to rag men about.

    • @WickedImpudence Quite honestly, my "lots of work bit" was more of a rhetorical device, a polite parallel to your FU. My opinion is valid and worthwhile by virtue of my nature as a rational being, same as yours. I feel no particular need to spout credentials from behind a screen to make my voice heard, or to abandon civil discourse for irrational and distracting obscenity, therein lies the difference. Inequality is not synonymous with inferiority. Thank you, and good night.

  • I don't care if she identifies as a feminist or not. It's her opinions that are more relevant. If she's genuinely bitter towards men, that would put me off but I think women can identify as feminist or not and be completely different from people who identify the same.

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  • no thankyou!
    I lived with a moderate feminist in the late '80's to early 90's, and was always getting hammered with what her more radical girlfriends thought, my advice is never tailgate a garbage truck, the splatters are garbage juice. in fact, I suggest guys rate women by their views on feminism; if they support it, they are PUA bait.
    if they are MRA supporters, they are worth trying.

    suggest a verbal test; if they can discuss Karen Straughn, Marc Rudolph, etc.
    and if they can recite the four levels of MGTOW. after that, can they bait fish hooks, and gut fish, and if they like feeding your dog?

    feminism is the H1N1 of relationships.
    manginas only.

    G

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  • Anyone that identifies as feminist is never going to get close to me.
    Not even going to raise anything controversial, avoid all discussion to prevent social catastrophe. Honestly, because there is no way to discern the difference between a feminist and femi-nazi.

    I don't understand why any woman would relate themselves to the bullshit that is third-wave feminism. Of course most aren't a "femi-nazi" but the term "femisism" is going to be tied with femi-nazi to anyone paying attention to feminist activities...

    Continuing to identify oneself a feminist while the face of modern feminism is ruining the world just seems like a person ignorant of current events.

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    • That's like saying Muslims should abandon their beliefs because of ISIS. Or that any other movement/religion etc should end because of the radical people. Football fans should stop watching football because of the riots. That doesn't make any sense, dude.

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    • Yeah and no member of ISIS identifies themselves as a radical Muslim so what's your damn point? Lmao.

    • @lumos is right. Radical feminists call themselves feminists, Daesh call themselves Muslims. That's just how it is.

  • Only if she's the equality-for-all-type. And yes, those do exist.

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  • Id date a feminist, but not a feminazi. In other words I'd date someone who respects my own opinion and can tolerate other people having different views without feeling as though that is a moral weakness on their part - I require that level of mental ability to be able to get along with people (the ability to realise that opinions are just that - opinions and are subjective not objective). A lot of my friends (girl friends f not girlfriends if you catch my drift) including my best friend who happens to be a girl would describe themselves as feminists, but I am not. It does not stop us getting on.

    Whilst I believe in equality before the law and in societies eyes for all people regardless of colour, creed or gender, I also believe there are fundamental genetic and psychological differences between genders. I also believe that in the society to which we belong (which I used to quite like but which is changing) gender roles play an important part in social cohesion and lead to contented and secure people and children. I won't go further than that for lack of space etc - but all that matters is that is my opinion. Having that belief does not make me stupid, a dinosaur, evil, a chauvinist etc. It does not mean I do not want, campaign for and fight for equality and it does not mean I think one sex is somehow objectively better than another...

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  • No, I wouldn't.

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  • I believe everyone should be treated equally regardless of their sex, race, sexuality, upbringing, and should be allowed to do whatever job they desire even if it's traditionally something the opposite sex does, why should have they bear the burden of doing the house work, cooking, looking after kids, etc. That would be sexism and not treating women equally so men need to equally share the work women do, so when you say women should stop acting like dudes are you saying that nothing would get done? Because you think men are lazy? And are incapable of doing the things that women do? And women can't do what men can? Just because for the majority men have more developed muscles? That they can't do trades or other work that makes predominantly do? If so you need to get your head out of the 60s and grow up, take responsibility for yourself and your own problems instead of finding a wife that would cook you food, clean up after you and do your washing because if you can't do that you're little more than an animal. Oh and as for your question it wouldn't matter to me if I loved her.

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  • Never. We are simply too different given that my values and ideals are ridiculously traditional to the extent that even American "conservatives" are thrown off by them. That said, however, I cannot control who I fall for nor can the feminist. Many people with irreconcilably different views and personalities have fallen in love and made it work.

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  • yes, and i hate this question and all like it

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  • Depends on her definition of feminist.
    Technically, I AM a feminist, believing in equality between men and women, but I don't fit the bill of a modern feminist/lunatics.

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    • We call those people radical feminists, feminazis, or just plain misogynists (since that's what they are). I find most feminists, like yourself, like both men and women and want to promote equal rights for both.
      Of course for your own wellbeing you should avoid crazy man-haters. Everybody should avoid those people. :P

  • Not really, but not for the same reasons as you.

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  • My willingness to date a girl is opposite-related to her affiliation with feminism.

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  • Depends on what they mean by feminism.

    If they are of the moderate kind, which are concerned about reasonable stuff (like abortion rights, the pill, create conscience about how nasty is rape, or that women should have the same work oportunities than men), sure, why not?

    If they are of the kind that sees patriarchy even in the soup or if they are of the kind that calls male lust *sexual objectification* or *male gaze* or such nonsense, hell no.

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  • Not a chance in hell

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  • Yes I would, but not feminazi.

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