Little disturbing things people say?

so a girl i'm chatting with comments, "i'm ready to find someone to be in a relationship with" and i know she didn't mean it bad, but i thought, "jeez, what, were you a slut all the years past having casual sex, but actually having a relationship is a big step you're ready for now?"

anyone else hear little disturbing things like that? or am i reading way too much into it?

  • yep, slut
    6% (1)50% (1)11% (2)Vote
  • no, she didn't mean it that way
    94% (16)50% (1)89% (17)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
see!! I WAS RIGHT! lol she posted this on her page. I feel my suspicions have been slightly verified that she slept around in college lmao.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • yeah reading into it too much 深読みすぎ

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    • see, now that is a good answer. short and sweet and to the point. and i am going to run those symbols through google translate before i thumbs up

Most Helpful Guy

  • the disturbing comment is from you.

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    • do tell. what is disturbing?

What Girls Said 8

  • Um. Has it ever crossed your mind that she went through a bad break up? Or that she has been too busy focusing on other things in her life like education/her career? Or that she simply didn't feel ready emotionally for a relationship? To assume that this girl has only had casual sex is very judgmental of you, she could very well be inexperienced or have very little experience in general. Seems to me like you just have an extremely negative mindset and would blindly bash anyone because you refuse to have an open mind.

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    • And even if she did sleep around, why would that be your business? Why do you care so much about this girl and what she has/hasn't done? Why are you so negative?

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    • @lumos

      real life lols

    • A person's sexual past doesn't necessarily determine the quality of their future relationships.
      If you're so concerned with it, then instead of jumping to conclusions and assuming she's had a lot of casual sex, just ask her what she means by that and why she feels she wasn't ready in the past. No need to start slut-shaming anyone.

  • No, not necessarily. Some people just aren't ready to commit whether they're just scared of a relationship and or have other things to prioritize.

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  • When a guy says it, it means he's done partying and is ready to settle down, find a lovely woman, perhaps eventually make her his wife, and start a family. Good for you, man!

    Girl says same thing: what a slut!

    Yet guys continue to wonder why we tend to be selective about who we sleep with, or even associate sex with shame and low self worth. Nicely done, men. Nicely done.

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    • just because girls are dumb and like players or date guys they know are players doesn't mean i need to be a moron and do the same. i on purpose didn't rack up a high count, so why shouldn't i get to be expect the same?

    • And how do you know she has racked up a high count? Just because she hasn't been in a relationship lately doesn't necessarily mean she's been out there sleeping with anyone and everyone. She could have been single, she could be a virgin. She could have social anxiety, or have gone through a rough break up. Being ready for a relationship could mean anything, really. A bit judgmental to automatically assume the worst, wouldn't you think?

  • More likely she was just hinting that she wants a relationship with you.

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    • see, that is another good answer. short, sweet, and makes a point. thumbs up for you.

  • Not ready for a relationship doesn't mean someone's a slut. Where did you get that one from.

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  • The only disturbing thing about this is that society keeps saying women are sluts for having sex.

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    • sluts for having sex? no. sluts for having casual sex and/or for sleeping with thugs and trash? yeah.

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    • i don't want a boyfriend, soo, don't really give a damn. if girls sleep with players and like players thats on their dumb asses. doesn't mean i need to be a moron too.

    • You already are lol

  • I don't get why you'd even think that.

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  • Dude what's the problem with that. Maybe she didn't find the right guy yet and why not go out and have fun in the meantime.

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    • given that you're not a man i don't expect you to understand that part lmao

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    • nope. actually looking for a girl that's got a count 5 or under. given that i'm 24 i think that's reasonable, and since i would pass that standard despite having ample chance to make it much higher.

    • Who says its reasonable and what gives standards for a man to decide how many the women should sleep with. Excuse me but aren't you a bit close minded...

What Guys Said 1

  • she could be getting over a long term relationship that ended bad, smartass

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