What does it mean when my girlfriend send me a text about need time to think about us?

My girlfriend told me that she feel like we aren't doing much on our date, all we do is make out, and she feels we haven't created a strong bond with each others.

She then sent me the following text:
"It's just for a while I've been thinking about us and I can't picture us in the future like I don't think that I should feel this way, so I'm just gunna have time to think for a while"

I reply with "just text me anytime you want about your decision and I want us to continue to be together but if you want to move on is ok"

What does this mean and what should I do? Just gave her time? Is she seeing another guy? Are we breaking up soon?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It doesn't sound like she's seeing anyone else. It sounds like she doesn't feel like you two have really connected other than making out.

    A relationship needs more than making out to be sustainable. You need to know each other inside and out. Making out is nice, but there is so much more than that.

    You both need to know what makes each other happy and sad, what you both are passionate about, and you need to share common goals for the future. She needs to feel like you can confide in her and she should be able to confide in you.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I personally think you are indeed soon going to break up and her mind is fairly made up about it. Shame, you probably didn't actually do anything wrong. If she doesn't value the time you spend together, what can you do?

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What Girls Said 5

  • She doesn't feel you get her beyond the making out. She wants to feel understood and special and the situation between you is just not hitting the mark. She is starting to wonder whether the grass is greener so she is taking some time to consider her options - will I find someone new or should I give him another shot? Someone else may have already taken her eye or her ear.

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  • "Need time" is usually (but not always) a way of separating before breaking up. It's something people say when they don't have the heart to break up with someone. It is a way to remove oneself from the situation with the least amount of confrontation; sometimes the other party will grow tired and just end it themselves and the person "needing time" escapes unscathed.

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    • Ok I understand, I will stop texting her and move on

  • Sound like she trying to decide if to break up or keep trying.

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  • What she is saying is that you aren't adventurous and she would like you to pick up your game and actually make her feel special.

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  • She's obviously having second thoughts and indecisive about the relationship because it's not progressing beyond ", making out". When people are in a relationship it's important to spend time doing things other than just making out, or you'll just drift apart. You can't build a bond and become close if the relationship is based on sex.

    If you want the relationship to develop then let her know you want to spend quality time together too.

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    • Ok so what else can we do? Can you give me an example? Going to Disney land and stuff?

    • Talk to her, ask her where she'd like to go , make suggestions to her. Spend time going places where you both like. Do you know what sort of things she likes to do , or places she likes to go? Do you both spend time talking , about what you both want?

    • Change up the way you guys make out its probably boring her

What Guys Said 8

  • How long you two been together? Not bashing on you, but is that all you do (make-out session/sex) on your dates with her?

    You really want to work this relationship? Then don't give her space, you work that shit out. She's vulnerable and confused at this point in yalls relationship and a smooth-talker can easily make her drawn to him and forget about you. She's running away, as a man it is your duty to chase. lol i know this shit sounds cheesy, but women love being chased by their man. It's like a confirmation that you still care and love them.

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    • Like about two months. I texted her earlier today asking for forgiveness and she had not responded. I will not contact her anymore cause it will just make me look more needing than I already am.

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    • But hey I'm only speaking from experience and I don't like the concept of messaging someone if they have an issue with me (distance dictates like if across country or state). I believe in confronting shit in person. Messages are more impersonal and you two haven't build a solid foundation. She doesn't know the true YOU, yet. That takes more than 2 months and years for you to figure her all out. You dig what I'm tryna say? They complicated creatures. Just read between the lines and decipher their words and if you take action before it blows up. You'll do just fine. Anyway, lmk how shit down. Wish you luck.

    • Alright, if she reply back then I will let you know how it will end up. Thanks for taking the time to help me out 😊

  • She said all you do is make out - Talk to her, get to know, communication is paramount to forming a strong bond.

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    • She won't reply back to my text anymore

    • I would be inclined to go with your plan to give her more time. If she doesn't make contact in a few days go old school and write her a letter saying you want to talk to her, find out about her etc - By posting it you put ball firmly in her court.

    • Ok lol. Writing letter 😅

  • Yeah, it's typical of a girl. You should tell her to step it up and make an effort. She's just as guilty as you for only making out and not getting deeper into the relationship. I wouldn't let her get off that easy. Girls love to say you are the problem when in reality its mostly them.

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    • Yea, she told me that All I ever want is making out when she's the one that initiated the last couple of dates.

  • There's only one thing you should do.

    Tell her you understand and will respect her decision to go on a break. And then you should go out there and sleep with a few women and live happily ever after.

    This way, if your girlfriend realizes the error of her ways and comes back, then great... if not, well... no big deal.

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  • She's asking for a break so she can feel guit free about fucking another guy (who she was probably talking to behind your back)

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  • She's dumping you. Try to work it out so you are inside another woman when she calls to make it official.

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  • Its a little too late to do much and there's a high possibility its over she maybe see some one else who she likes... You just have to hope she might just come back don't set your heart on it though if it happens it happens.

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  • I agree with what the other guys here have said.

    She probably wants to break up but is only 90% sure and is too cowardly to come right out and say it or risk it, when there's still that 10% chance it might not work out with whoever else she's probably talking to.

    Advice? Deal with the fact you're probably splitting up now, get it out of the way, it'll be tough but get your friends round and out for a drink or something.

    That text you sent was probably the worst thing you could have done. Don't be warm and give her time like that, she's messing you about! Tell her you don't want to play games and she either wants to be with you or she doesn't, either that or break up with her yourself to save a lot of hassle and quickly move on.

    I may get downvoted, but being too mr nice guy with girls like this is probably the worst thing you can do. You have to be assertive with how you approach it. The more you dither, the more girls like that walk all over you. Let her know you won't stand for it and 9 times out of 10, if a girl does have any feelings for you, she'll panic, realise she'll lose you fast if she doesn't quit the games and get back with you.

    If she doesn't have feelings though it will at least let her know she can't emotionally manipulate you with her cold behaviour towards you, nor will she be able to have you as 2nd best, and you'll know you're better off out of it and with someone who likes you for you.

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    • Ok thanks, I will not contact her anymore and if she does come back, I probably just tell her to fuk off

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