Do my boobs get in the way of someone loving me?

I posted a selfie a while ago, as an anonymous user, and got pretty positive feed back, but I don't receive the same positive attitudes from people I know in real life. Guys or girls will ask me out, and admit before we actually go out that they just wanted to score, or feel me up. This happens to me /constantly/. I've never had my first kiss, and I've only held hands once. I wish someone liked me for me but I feel like no one can, and that my big breasts get in the way of it. I have DDD's, and that's usually the first or second thing people notice after meeting me. It's always brought up in conversation, and only one person has ever actually asked to date me (they dated me out of pity, they later admitted) and the rest ask to be friends with benefits. I'm really worried I'll never find a real loving relationship because of my chest, and it makes me feel awful depressed.
Do you think that I'll ever actually find love, or should I get a breast reduction before I continue my search?

TLDR: Everyone's more focused on my breasts than my personality and it's really getting in the way of my love life. Will I ever find love?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You have big boobs, and big boobs are obvious - not something you can hide. People are going to see them, and guys who are attracted to them are going to be drawn to you. You know all this, of course, but this is okay. If I could wave a wand and give you B-cups, you would STILL have some guys initially interested in you because of your boobs - believe it or not. And maybe others who are attracted to other body parts of yours.

    None of that really matters, though. What matters is that you establish up-front with every guy that you take things slowly, and you focus your early dates not on making out or sex or whatever, but instead on getting to know each other and discussing compatibility. Don't be shy about ending it if the guy tries to push you too fast or if you find out you aren't actually compatible - you've already learned that there is no shortage of guys interested in you (even if it's often for the wrong reasons), so there will be plenty of guys to replace the ones that you reject.

    Before long, you'll get a reputation for being picky and not "easy", and fewer guys just interested in your boobs will approach you - but expect that even guys who really want a genuine relationship with you are always going to like your boobs - a lot. That's okay - they just need to want MORE than just that, and you have the power to send them packing if you think they don't.

    Remember this too: no one can really see your personality from across the room, but they can see your boobs. Thus, it's not surprising that such "shallow" things are part of their initial attraction - surface beauty is all there is at first. Accept that and don't dwell on it, but instead focus on getting to know them and vice versa. Guys who don't seem to be interested in your personality after a bit of time should be dumped, and guys who are interested should get more of your time and attention. You may have to kiss a few frogs first, but you'll find a prince before very long.

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    • To be fair, I HAVE known girls who are weirdly weirdly good at hiding big boobs. Including this 5'2" 105lb cross-country runner type, with zero, no, negative fashion sense, who just had these fuckin' DD gazoongas under her weird sackcloth-ass ootd's.

      Talk about winning the bonus prize.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Use your floppy pillows to attract them, and if they're asshole then hoof them right in the front butt so they have no chance of proceation. (But in all seriousness there's this stigma that big booby Jubys are dumb so nice guys will go for girls in the itty bitty titty committee... Just show that you're a nice girl) :-3

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What Guys Said 10

  • "should I get a breast reduction before I continue my search?" No, don't tamper with your body over reasons like this. A girl is way more to me than her breasts. But, if her breasts are big that's one hell of a bonus. And that douche who actually said to you "I dated you out of pity" is not only a disrespectful condescending idiot but he has done you a huge favor, he showed his true colors to you before things have gotten worse.

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    • The person that dated me out of pity wasn't a guy but thank you for the feed back!

  • Their more then breast to a girl :o I have a friend who is having the same situation, she struggles with dating but for now we have fun living the single life :3

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  • Boo hoo, I'm 33 and never had a girlfriend. You're sad and all, yet you'll probably be married years with kids before me.

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    • I mean...

      you'll probably be married with kids years before me.

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    • You 19, not 90, I think you have PLENTY fo time to find the right guy.

    • 18 not 80, lol

  • Just enjoy being yourself.
    Change social circle if anything.

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  • Do you dress where they are the least, "In your face"? 95% of the guys your age only want physical affection. Just be assertive and not let the guys pressure you or make you feel cheap.. because your NOT and deserve to be treated with respect.

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  • i think u will one day find someone that look for you more than your boobs if u know what i mean. anyway i think u should get confident and even do a joke about it. like " yeah u already meet my boobs now try look at my eyes up here and meet me"

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  • You must sacrifice your tits to flat titty chicks

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  • Find clothes that sort of hide your boobs better if that makes sense

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  • People ask others out because they find them attractive. That's how it works.

    The question is if they are interested in developing s deeper connection and if that happens.

    But the attraction is always first.

    If you were ugly, you'd get no dates, period. THAT gets in the way of your love life.

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  • It will change as you get older, just embrace them theyi will work to your advantage at times also

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What Girls Said 0

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