How to be someone's first choice?

Always have this problem
Talk to someone
Think it's going great
Some other girl shows up and thats it
I'm second choice and basically don't matter 😀
I'm not that bad


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Pshh homeboy is tripping if he made you second choice. Did you show him that aesthetic ass selfie you took when you were 16?

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Most Helpful Girl

What Guys Said 15

  • I think most of us have been down this road where we become close to someone - We get feelings for them but they just want to be friends - Okay I know how you feel about compliments so I will say that I see no reason why your looks or personality may prevent anything from happening. You are 18 very young and I think you said you are about to go into art college. It is a clichΓ© but it is true, you may just have not met the right person yet, In art college or in an artistic career, you may meet more people on your wavelength so eventually should click with someone on all the levels you wish to. Do not dwell on past episodes where you felt things have gone wrong but look to the future where you would meet someone who appreciates your looks and clicks with your creative personality. Again I say at 18 it seems so daunting but there is so much of your life ahead of you, I honestly think you have very little to worry about.
    4.bp.blogspot.com/.../...ou+Wait+For+Something.jpg
    www.bestsayingsquotes.com/.../...es-6-078ac658.jpg

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  • When i do this to a girl ( not that i've done it a lot or often ) its because :

    1- she is not as attractive as i wish a girlfriend of mine to be and i can't see myself having anything long term with her so i dont want to hurt her.

    2- she doesn't sound like good girlfriend material , this could be due to a lot of things but mainly if she doesn't look or feel feminine or is really shallow/dumb , can't be trusted and will probably hurt me somehow or cheat then i avoid having a realtionship with her.

    3- I just happen to have better options , simply put.

    you are pretty and you seem to have a nice body so i dont think looks are problem ( maybe that nose ring is not exactly making you look like girlfriend material for some guys?) , i know nothing of your personality but maybe you have some traits that guys dont find really... feminine or makes them unsure if they should trust you or not , and of course there is always the you're just unlucky and they happen to stumble upon a prettier, smarter, depeer, cooler and overall better girl ( highly doubt it though , as a guy finding quality girls is not easy )

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    • Lol I've been told I'm a 10/10 personality wise by my guy friends yet I'm never picked

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    • dont change , won't get men , its really that simple dont put too much thought into it. bye

    • I'd rather be me and happy and single than be someone stupid expectation of a female just to get a boyfriend

  • Your dating teens and all they care about is how hot you are, wait it out to you turn 21 it will get better

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    • The world does not revolve around always having a boyfriend your only 18 a puppy at that. Work on your school work live for yourself and one day you will find a classy guy that cares about you and not how hot you are

    • I do focus on school so much so I've never had a boyfriend so that's not the problem
      It's not like I'm putting all my thought into getting one because I'm not
      It's bot like I don't try to get one but they always find someone prettier or smarter or thinner

    • As you get older guys will start carring about how nice and how good of a person you are and personality as well. You will see.

  • You are second place because you allow yourself to be standing there waiting and of course - you are ok... but she is better.

    Cool, the second that asshole does that.. or thinks like that.. walk the fuck away.
    it doesn't work out with the other girl, she blows him off - he thinks he can come back and talk - fuck off - you ain't coming back, im gone forever

    be polite, be nice - but that is a absolute end of a phase when someone puts you on second list

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    • I don't wait around lol if he finds someone else I basically stop talking
      It still hurts and such But I avoid contact with the person

  • eh tell me when you found out how lol

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  • Aside from being hot and awesome, there's nothing you can do except hope to be lucky. It's not something you or he has direct control of.

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  • Don't give em a reason to make you their second choice.

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  • Kiss the guy on time and not make him wait for make-up. 😜

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  • Maybe you are too proud or have too much self respect. You have to stake your claim. Also, don't talk too much.

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  • Basically u need to stop talking to the wrong guys

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  • are you treating these guys like a buddy?

    post some texts.

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  • Like seriously 😶?

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  • That's a sad thing to see, you'll find someone that makes you their focus. It'll come

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  • Talk to someone :D

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  • If that happens, you know for certain, that guy ain't worth your time.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I dunno... I wonder this myself when I was 16! Eh... I don't try anymore. I'll flirt for like um 3 seconds and thats that! I never get to close to anyone... hahah I don't have that problem just avoid guys at all cost simply because now in day relationship aren't really worth it. Hey look at the bright side you can be awesome like me and join the single for life club!

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  • I know the feels. :/ It happens to me every time, but I don't care anymore. The right guy is going to show up someday. If someone doesn't choose me, then I move on. That's all I can do. Just be you and someone will see that you are special and deserve to be #1. :)

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    • Bit I've gotten to this point where I've been hurt too much and I'm just numb emotionally and just wanna quit because don't feel like if he's out there
      That he's worth it all

  • You can't make someone choose you first, especially someone specific because you're not them unfortunately. You just have to find a person who gives you as much as you you give them.

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    • But so far Noone has done that 😢 it's like they enjoyed the attention from me and then find someone else

  • Oh wow, do we share the same life? I would answer but i am forever #2 as well. And just to make it all the better, the people who choose someone else over me ALWAYS come back down the line and wonder why I am no longer interested.

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  • Nothing's wrong with you, it's them.

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  • his loss girl... his loss

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