How does dating a broke guy seem to you?

dating a guy for sometime then finding out he is broke- or he has no money at all from time to time.

I make a lot more money than him due to my education.

I don't want anything from him, but it just sounds awkward that he has no money for coffee or tea now. Realistically, should I continue dating him or should I wait and see?

  • I shouldn't date him
    25% (8)22% (5)24% (13)Vote
  • I should wait and see if things go better
    75% (24)78% (18)76% (42)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • What I think you need to understand that women often expect men to fulfill certain gender roles, even if the woman doesn't realize that she does. In your case finding out that he doesn't come close to having the ability to do so makes you uncomfortable.

    A lot of relationships end, when a guy was doing okay financially, but for whatever reason runs into trouble making money. As soon as a man is no longer able to act as a provider the woman commonly leaves him, or she mistreats him until he leaves her. The thing is these women act like they don't even understand why they resent her man not making enough money, even if she still has plenty for the family while he gets back on his feet.

    I think you need to deal with this so it doesn't cause you problems in the future. What if one day your husband gets laid off and can't find a new job for a long time? It will feel just as weird to you then as this does to you now. As long as he isn't sponging off of you, and brings something to your relationship then what he makes really shouldn't be a problem.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Im into talented people. Money is not important but being able to make money to take care for life is important. Moreover to some extent money prove a person ability. All in all, a guy dont need to spend money on me or dates but he need to have money.
    I mean girls dont need to rely on men but they do need a guy that they can count on.
    Can a guy who dont have money for a cup of tea can take care of himself and someone else?

    Lirr

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    • Its okay if he is broke at some point of life but "from time to time"?
      I can't feel safe with a guy like that!

What Guys Said 13

  • im highly educated and have one of the highest IQ's than any of my peers, but i still can't get a job so im broke... i would be able to have a few dates but after that it prob just be coffee or a movie at my place... even if i didn't have money i would still make the date special and intimate to show that i like the person.

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    • @heavensgift2girls this >.< like being slapped with a giant dick of truth across the face! just imagine the famous rocky punch with a over sized comedy dick :3

    • LOL You have a way with words.

  • What do you value most in a man? Does he have that?

    What do you want a guy to think about how materialistic you are?

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    • I value honesty and not lying to me.
      This guy is not a player, definitely.
      It just feels weird

    • Relationships require effort, even when they are very good and the two of you are a good fit. Just tell yourself that some effort is required but the chance of it being a good relationship justifies it.

  • I'm between jobs at the moment and I'm pretty much at the point where I can't really spare money for a coffee. If I were dating someone, I'd be honest and tell them about my situation and what I'm doing about it; I'm not dating them for their money, I'm dating them to see how compatible we are as people, as companions and as partners, ya know?

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  • If you have that much money. Why don't you just pay for him then?
    Men have in all times been expected to do this even at times when they couldn't.

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  • Its not about the $$, its about the connection you feel. Going on dates is nice but it doesn't make you better lovers. Only being together does that.

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  • Do you like the guy? If yes, date him. If no, don't date him. What does money have to do with it?

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    • I do like him. It's just we are in a culture where the man is expected to pay and do everything because it's part of being a Man. We grew up like this.

    • Doesn't mean you need to accept that way of thinking. Don't let society dictate your decisions. Be an individual, not a sheep.

  • Personally, I don't care how much my partner makes. I just want her to give a hard-nosed effort and have a plan to pursue one of her passions.

    With all that said, if someone can't afford a coffee or a tea then they might not be suited to being in the early stages of dating. If he'd like lost his job or something a few months into a relationship, then that's no biggie, but right now I imagine he'd wanna put his best foot forward while still in the early dating phase.

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    • He has a hob but it doesn't pay very well. But he also does extra work here and there, and sometimes he gets much more than his salary

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    • I see.

      Has he actually told you that he's low on money time to time? Or could it have been a one-time thing (didn't have his debit/credit cards on him, only had the ten dollar bill)?

    • He said he has no money- he spent money on things that came up suddenly. I didn't ask him because I don't want to embarras him. I think this will happen from time to time

  • There's a difference between - Broke and trying to get on your feet, VS. Broke and leaching off the girl.

    However, you begin to grow tired of "I NEED A MAN THAT CAN SUPPORT ME! I'M A VALUABLE WOMAN!".

    Wouldn't Value equate with self sufficiency? I never got that.

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  • Lack of income means a whole avenue of negative traits in a females eyes. I personally wouldn't want to date a broke girl either.

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  • Do what you want to

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  • He might be going through a tough time in his life right. Might be hard for him to find a decent job. But I say you should NOT leave him over that, because that could mess him up emotionally to find out a girl he likes left him over monetary issues. It wouldn't be a nice feeling. I say you stick it out and just try to help him. Boost his confidence, because he may be feeling down, but just doesn't show it on the outside. A man likes to know a women will stick by his side when times get hard.

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    • I want to do that because I like him. But I noticed he is a bit distant these days, and I believe it's because of that. I want to show him I am standing by him , but I don't want to embarrass him. How do you think I should do that?

  • No, i think you don't really like him...

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  • tell him to change or things will be over. Wait and see.

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What Girls Said 11

  • At my age? Not an issue.

    If I were in my late 20s or older then it'd be an issue because I would be concerned that he couldn't manage his finances. But I'm just starting out so I wouldn't judge a guy for also just starting out as well.

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  • Money actively turns me off, so, there's yr answer.

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  • Personally, I would not date a guy who is broke, especially if I were in my 30s. Does he not have a stable job? Not having money for coffee sounds extreme.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrLequ6dUdM

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    • Yeah he has a job, but it's not enough. He has plans to start his own thing but it@s difficult now. Yeah it's difficult when you are 30 or more- because I want to settle down with a man.

    • What's wrong with being the breadwinner? A car doesn't need 2 engines, and all that.

    • @redeyemindtricks I never said anything was wrong with a woman wanting to be the breadwinner -- I just said that I would personally not be into it ("it" being the situation OP provided). It's just a personal opinion.

      It'd be different if I were already in a long-term relationship with a guy and he lost his job or something -- I wouldn't mind at all being the breadwinner while he got back on his feet; however, I would not be interested in starting a new relationship with someone who's "broke."

  • Honestly, for me it depends. If he had intentions on working towards getting to a better place, I'd stick around, especially if I had the money to do so. If he just didn't care and had no ambition I would move on.

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  • Well most of the time I'm broke due to being an adult and paying all my bills and shit. I work hard for my money and my boyfriend is in the same boat plus we grew up poor. But then again that's me. If you care about money more than him then maybe you shouldn't be dating him? Life is hard.

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  • wait it out, if he gets a better paying job. but a man needs some stability and you can't support him.

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  • Well I'm in college so right know we can be broke together but when I'm older I might not have such mindsets

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  • I don't think money should be a big deal. I mean, the guy I'm currently with always goes Dutch which I prefer so far. If he can't pay for the places you're picking maybe you should try to help him come up with date ideas that accommodate his budget.

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  • It sounds like you've already made your decision about the kind of man you want to be with - the dominant breadwinner type. But you sound like a capable woman, so perhaps you could find the "house husband" type as well. There's nothing wrong with wanting either. However, the most important thing is not how much money he has now, but rather his potential and outlook on life. And most importantly, how well he treats you.

    Money comes and goes but a great personality in a guy is hard to come by.

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    • Oh, I forgot to add that the way he manages what money he has is also so important. Is he saving it? Doing budgets? A good planner and has goals for the future? You should keep getting to know him until you've determined all these things. Ask the right questions.

  • You should stick around. It says a lot about u if you don't. What happens if a rich guy turns his nose at you because you can't afford designers or whatever haha. It's all about perspective. There's always a person better then the person your with. A greedy person is never satisfied.

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  • If the table was flipped, what would you want him to do?

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