So I have this friend that is mutual friends with a large portion of my circle of friends. She fun to hang around and we have always gotten along. However she has recently made it known to me and others in my group that she has a romantic interest in me.
I am not interested in her romantically. I however am not interested in in alienating her or hurting her feelings ethier. I must tread these waters very carefully as the fallout of this could have negative consequences amongst all of my closest friends.
I also know this girl well enough that she will want a detailed explanation as to why I don't want to date her. Which leads me to my question... How do I tell her that I don't want to date her, and that the main reason is that she is a single mom and I don't want all the responsibility and burden that goes with entering into that situation?
And before you type the answer "try it! Single mom's are great! You might end up liking it!" No... I won't like it. I know this about myself.
If she's a single mom, she should get her shit together as she's in an incredibly responsible business of raising another human being.
She needs to understand that nobody owes her a romantic relationship nor a fucking explanation. If she can't handle a simple "I'm not interested", she's unfit to be a parent.
I find it incredibly obnoxious that you're unable to decline this woman's advances without her causing a shitstorm. What sort of parent is she, if she can't handle one of the most common things most people experience in life: rejection. How the fuck is she supposed to teach her child to deal with upsetting topics if she can't even handle a "no".
The best course is to be frank about the fact you're simply not attracted/interested. It should be enough. If she demands anything beyond that, she will make herself look like a fool, not you. Banging on about wanting a detailed explanation is crazy and obsessive.
Be straight up with her. Even if it hurts her now it will enable her to move on. A single mom doesn't have the time or emotional energy to waste on someone who doesn't feel the same. Be super clear but say it as nice as possible since you'll most likely be seeing more of each other.
You don't have to have a reason for not being romantically interested in someone first off. You may have your reasons, but she doesn't have to know. However, she does need to know that you aren't interested, and as soon as possible, or you risk leading her on. As awkward as it is, you need to pull her aside and gently explain that while you do value her as a friend and as a person, you simply do not see her in that way.
No don't be straight that will hurt Tell her "You wish to fall in love oneday" so she understand u not into her. Single Mom break my heart I've a friend like that she wish if she get virginity back, she wish to marry. I suggest for them to marry a single dad. that would be fair solution. my friend problem is that she don't want to marry a single dad.
Do you care about her or just about what your circle of friends will think? If you do care, you should be honest and tell her why you are not romantically intrested in her. Be very clear and respectful. You could even admit that it it's a little bit selfish, that you probably don't feel "love' for her, although you care... and think she deserves better. That's the best you can do and no real friend can hold that against you. Don't wait too long, the sooner she knows the better.
Just be honest! Just let her know that at this time in your life you either dont want to or can't handle the responsibility that you would be "signing up" for.
Tell the truth, and then you tell her that it's better for her to know it. Tell her you don't wanna give her false hopes and that this is better for both of you. Make it clear that you like her, but not romantically.
Be honest with her - Beating around the bush will only hurt her feelings more - Tell her the truth but try and give her a soft landing say she is a lovely woman but you don't see yourself involving yourself with kids at the moment