I talked to my ex after almost three years and felt the happiest I've been in a while. What should I make of it?

So, recently I've been going through one of the darkest times I've ever gone through because my best friend committed suicide the end of last year. I'm going to start seeing a counselor at my college and I'm trying to just make it through one day at a time. Not too much has made me happy though, or lifted my spirits.

I saw my ex-girlfriend at church yesterday, which is unusual because she usually doesn't go to that particular church (we have several, it makes sense, don't worry about it). I haven't spoken to her much in the last few years since we separated. I'd been thinking about her, actually though, that morning. So when I saw her I was surprised and without much thinking I went up and nudged her and we ended up talking out in the lobby for almost the whole sermon. My friends who had come to see me that day (I play on the worship band) mentioned that I looked so happy.

What do you guys think? For all those non-religious on here, I can understand if you think this is dumb, so please keep religion out of it if that is your thoughts, I don't need hear that, but I'm wondering if God has led me back to her. I'm trying to work this out and understand, but my family often pulls in their own biases, so I'm trying to get a detached perspective.

I greatly appreciate your thoughts.


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What Guys Said 1

  • What to do with her greatly depends on how your relationship ended. If you do not feel the relationship ended badly and did not end on bad terms then there shouldn't be a problem with seeing how things go or at least just being talking as friends.

    With the loss of your best friend I am sorry, hang in there. I have had some friends who have killed themselves and I know how it feels. Likewise I have battled depression my entire life and have attempted to take my own life as well. It's not a bad thing to feel these emotions, it'seems natural and there for a reason. Don't try to push them away, let yourself feel them and then keep going. Talk to people about it, if it is God calling you to this girl talk to her about it, and just talk to people about anything as much as you can. And stay active and busy, I speak from experience when I say having too much time alone is not a good thing when you are really down. Hang in there bro, it'll get better, a lot better, in ways you could never expect

    • It ended on weird terms. She broke up with me because she was going through a hard time with her parents' divorce. She had a hard time coming to grips with the reasons behind it. At the same time she was starting college, whereas I had been in college for a year. I wasn't having the best time, and it really brought me down seeing all of my friends go away. I feel like she also was afraid that she wouldn't be able to have the college experience she wanted while she was with me. So she felt the best thing was to try and be friends. That proved to be a bit more than I could bear at the time. Now though, for me it feels different.

      I did tell her about my friend, actually.

      I'm not sure where it will go.

      I'll try my best to not remain alone. Thank you for your help. =)