Should I consider breaking up with him because he doesn't ever ask how my Dad died?

We've been dating for a year and he knows my Dad passed really young but never asks why. He came home when I was lighting a candle for my Dad in the 15th anniversary of his death and after a moment asked if we had to keep the lights out.

My friends know as they ask from early on as had every boyfriend.

This one knows my Dad is dead, doesn't ask why when or how. He's met my extended family who brought up my Dad but nothing. Now I think I forced him to meet them.

He gives a whole lot of shit about what my step dad does and couldn't wait to meet him. My Step Dad owns several businesses and one would give my boyfriend wholesale prices on cars.

My boyfriend knows my Dad set money away for me to buy a house but he doesn't want to know about my Dad.

My younger sister got into a really bad accident two years ago. I lived in a different city and was in my car in workout clothes when I got the call. I drove at 115-125 mph with my hazards on passing people on the shoulder for two hours so I could get there before her surgery.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • If you feel it's a problem it probably isn't our own little problem just try and look at the brighter schema of your relationship

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What Guys Said 11

  • No don't. I personally think that he thinks you'd be uncomfortable telling him becuase he wants to repect you. Some guys are like that. If you really want him to know, act sad as if you have this memory of your dad and tell him how he died so you can actually see hi reaction, which could be "oh, wow, thats bad, I never wanted to ask you because I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable." Or if he completely ignores/doesn't seem to care just break up. But until you try to understand why he hasn't asked don't break up yet unless he's being abusive, etc.

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  • Wow... sounds like a real douche.

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  • My girlfriends dad died when she was twelve,
    I don't know how.
    I've considered how to broach the question but it seemed like she it is still (understandably) a sore spot for her.
    Truth is I don't know the first thing about when or how to ask a question like that and truth is, I'd rather her tell me when she is comfortable about it

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  • Maybe he doesn't like to ask sad things and bring you bad memories back. Don't be too harsh on him.

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  • Yea I mean... Maybe he doesn't want to bring up bad memories / doesn't want to deal with you emotionally (douchebag). Why don't you just ask him why? If it's bothering you enough to talk about it on here then you definatley need to bring it up with him... And if you can't bring it up with him then he's not really a good boyfriend he's not understanding at all... So why be with him? ASK HIM "why havnt you asked me about my dad?"

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  • Sometimes if it's an emotional issue I'll let them tell me on their own time and on their own terms. I hate having people ask me questions about stuff like that. So I tend to allow people to tell me when they are ready not when I am ready.

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  • Is this dad thing really important.. He's just giving you closure thinking you don't wanna talk about it.

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  • In that situation, I think I would act the same. I would not bring up the death of a loved one because I would think that is would bring back sorrow and loss for you. If you want to talk to him about it, bring it up in a conversation.

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  • He probably just doesn't know how to deal with emotional females

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  • Maybe he thinks you don't want to talk about it. Lots of people don't. That's a silly reason to break up with someone. For thinking it might hurt you and avoiding it?

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  • that's not really something u ask someone.. it's their choice if they want you to know or not...

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What Girls Said 1

  • I suppose he doesn't want to make you feel bad, and or has a hard time talking about death himself.

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