I am 27 turning 28. Right now I am in the stage of my life where I can see my other friends dating and getting engaged some are marrying. Most if not all of them are in long term relationships. Some of my guy friends live at home and still they have a woman to spend their weekends with.
Meanwhile its 11:30 I am at home alone posting this. I went on a date with a girl a few weeks ago, it was setup by my buddies girlfriend. I had a lot of fun I felt like we connected. However with the lack of actual interest on her part and the fact she rarely texts me back and she does not seem willing to meet for a second time. I tried. However this was the first date I had in 4 years. I try and I try, Online, in public, through public events, social events and nothing happens for me. This has led me to having social anxiety, depression. This has led me to being off work for 7 months clinically depressed and unwilling to do anything. obviously I am getting therapy meeting my doctor etc and we have been working this out for 7 months.
However deep down I know that until I can go on a date and feel like I am progressing and not just stuck in this 4 year rut while everyone else I know finds love and happiness. I am going to be miserable this depression I have had with no confidence has existed in me since highschool.
I have a brand new vehicle, I have a rewarding career, I have my own place that I own no room mates I have a cat for a companion I have several hobbies from racing, hockey, reptiles. etc My life is not empty but feeling that something is wrong with you weighs a person down and can drive them to the point where they literally think " This is it, this is my life until I either win the lottery or die." It got to one point where that statement was followed by " how can I end this on my terms?"
My question is what do women want? How do I go about figuring out what is wrong with me? Let me say this. I am ok with being single, I am not ok with eventually being inept and single at 30.
I'm not happy because I can't be in a relationship.
Sorry but I can't be happy being single it's so boring. I generally sit at home all day or go to my parents.
It's actually to the point I hate living.