I see this question all the time and it really makes me sad to see all the people, both male and female, feeling so alone and hopeless. It seems like even if you're a young woman, and you're not ugly, you still might have to fight tooth and nail to even have a shot in the dating world. I'm shy and reserved, not a drinker so I don't go to bars but I am a part time student and I work as a waitress so I meet men all the time, still, I end up alone every night. Is it because I won't put out on the first date? I don't know the reasons, all I really know is I'm tired of being alone. Is it so unreasonable to just want someone to tell me they love me?
So most of the men you meet while working as a waitress?
I can't speak for other men, but often I have met women (like today, in fact, at the Doctor's office) who I am attracted to and who seem friendly, but I don't ask them out because I feel it would be unfair to do so while they are doing their job. Especially since in that kind of job you are expected to be friendly to everyone, 9 to 90, so you never know if she is interested in you or is just good at her job.
Maybe you should get out in other situations, maybe a hiking club or something, to meet people away from your workplace.
I can tell you why I am not dating for a year now. first, work, I am too busy with somewhat the wrong job but its not that I hate it. its just that it makes me soft. 2nd, I have priorities, I want to achieve something, and I dont want to start with someone if I know I can't stay. 3rd I am too mess up inside and I know that the only thing that can stop this is too achieve my dreams. 4th I dont want to start something that I can't finish, that will be unfair to the other side. when you are not ready dont push it, when you are then go.
Certainly not all men are looking only for sex. I couldn't tell you the reasons based on what you've written. A while back a wrote a take on shy people in the dating world. Perhaps it might be of some help:
Well, you said you are shy. Your shy body language is most likely sending out the wrong signals that make guys think you dislike them. Such as avoiding eye contact, pointing your body away from them, or positioning your body behind something as if to hide.
It is definitely not unreasonable to want love and to want a partner. I highly doubt it is because you will not put out on the first date because that should not be expected. Keep to your values and who you are. Maybe try getting out more? I know that is hard working a job and doing college as well, but it could help. I am rather tired of being alone as well
Not at all. If i were you, id talk to guys and let them know they are cool. If they like you, they will ask you out. Nothing wrong with feeling lonely and want someone to love you. Your human, its part of the human cobdition.
It'd not unreasonable at all, I'm sure most people want someone to love them and care for them. It can be so hard to find that person though. Maybe just take a break from dating/trying to find someone for a month or so; it can be frustrating if you've been having trouble for a while.
There's no need to be sad if your single the key is don't be looking. the moment your at peace with yourself is when you find somebody great I've learned that through expierence
It's OK. I've been single for 8 months now with some hook ups (meaningless). It's better to wait and have meaningful relationships/sex instead of a hookup in my opinion. It depends how bad you want it. Write down what u want in a man, looks personality etc. You can also start wishing/manifestating on it. I've started manifesting one and I think I've almost got one but it wasn't all that I've wanted because I didn't write it down or was specific enough for the universe to know. The universe has forces and u just need to know how to use them. Also, u might not be ready yet... Good luck!! x