Girls, First of Current Boyfriend? Who do you care about more?

Girls, do you care about your first serious boyfriend or current boyfriend more?

I'm struggling here. I'm not the first guy there and feel that the first boyfriend is always better than me. She chose him first for a reason and therefore I feel he must be the better choice and has something I don't have. I guess I'm suffering from late bloomer syndrome.

As a result, this thinking destroys all relationships I've have and my general view of dating women. I'm in a viscious pattern where i date a girl, i end up using her for sex, start treating her bad, and then leaving. All because I wasn't chosen first. I'm with a girl currently and about the start this cycle again.

I think I can break the cycle by understanding women better. Do you care about your first serious boyfriend or current boyfriend more?

Thanks

  • First serious boyfriend more
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  • Current serious boyfriend more
    96% (23)100% (1)96% (24)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I mean, think about yr first job, versus yr current job.
    Ok, I just looked at yr age, so you might have to use yr imagination a bit here, but, imagine yr first job (probably some summer gig as a teenager) vs. yr future career.

    Yr first job was:
    • To a large extent, something you picked because it was (1) there, and (2) actually available to you, from a limited pool of choices.
    • In retrospect, most likely totally out of sync with yr actual skill set...
    • ... though you didn't know that at the time.
    • Ultimately, a learning experience.
    • You might still reminisce fondly about it, because most normal people reminisce fondly about most things -- even things that were, in point of actual fact, kinda shitty. Really, most people don't have shitty collective memories. It's a survival/coping mechanism -- the positive stuff stays at the forefront, for most people.

    You see where I'm going with this. The analogies should be pretty obvious.

    First boyfriend, for most girls, is just a dude who was there. I mean, we HAD to have a boyfriend, because, dude, all the cool girls had boyfriends, right?
    For most of us, boyfriend #1 was just laughably out of sync with what we actually need (ed) in a dude, but... the only way we could possibly learn that, was by having relationships like that.

    And, yeah, we probably look back on it fondly, because that's the way most people look back on most things.

    Really, don't mindfuck yrself too much here.

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What Girls Said 11

  • Um... so... the guy I'm with is my first serious boyfriend but not my first boyfriend. I had an ishly serious relationship with a guy before I started dating my current boyfriend.

    My current boyfriend means WAY more to me than the other guy.

    My current boyfriend is the sun, the moon, and all the stars. The other guy... there's no competition lol

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  • Without a doubt, current boyfriend. While you never forget your first, I look at it as a starting point of figuring out what you want and don't want in a so. Each relationship I've had dinse my first, I've said, well I didn't like this about that person so I look for something more from the next. Additionally and in conjunction with that, I am getting older and certain priorities change as well. I hope my current is my last, but I do know that if it ends, I'll have an even better understanding of who is Mr. Right for me.

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    • Do you expect every new boyfriend to be your last?

    • No. Other ones it's been more like, I'm not ready to get married yet but I'm having fun with this guy, see how it goes.

    • Thanks

  • Ehh my first and current boyfriend is one and the same guy so... But I assume I'd care more about my current boyfriend than a first boyfriend.

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  • Current. Obviously the first didn't work out. If I cared about the first more then there wouldn't be a current, I would still be hung up over the first.

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  • current one more.

    my first relationship was a james dean-esque romance that died far too young and beautiful. that said, i am not who i was then and he no longer has a place in my heart.

    i've finally met my soulmate, and he is everything to me. he even changed my mind about marriage (since, until i met him, i had no intention or interest in ever being married); he is my other half, my best friend, my sounding board, and everything else all rolled into one :)

    <3

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  • Current, they are my present my ex is my past, at one time he meant a lot to me but no longer holds that place in my heart.

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  • The girls aren't your problem here, you're your own problem. It's not her fault she met some other guys before she met you? As for your question obviously I care about my current boyfriend more or else why would I be dating him?

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  • My current boyfriend is also my first.
    But if he wasn't, Id say current. They broke up for a reason.

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    • Thank you. I appreciate the help!

  • The first is in the past, with nice memories when we were young and ignorant, which will never happen again. But the current one is EVERYTHING! You need to stop thinking that way because it will consume you.

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  • You are current n they are past for a reason!!! Have more confidence in yourself or u might just find that is your down fall.

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  • Most people's first partner was just someone who happened to be around at the right time. Who they really click with gets more refined.

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What Guys Said 0

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