Can you help me with my co-worker?

Hey all. In the last few months, I've developed a bit of a crush on my co-worker. We have great chats at work. She often laughs at what I'm saying and touches my arm. I've asked her to hang out three times and she had plans or an event to attend all three times which gave me the impression that she was not interested. Since then, I've kind of given up on pursuing her or asking to hang out though we still chat.

A few weeks ago, we had a work party and her friend, while drunk, told me that my co-worker likes me and asked if I'd be interested had we not worked together to which I answered "Of course.". I recently got her number and we have a quick chat here and there. However, since then, I've been having trouble with how to proceed with things. I usually have to initiate contact between us and she's always out with friends or at some event while I am more of a homebody.

Do you think she really likes me or do you think it was just something that was said in a drunken stupor? I really want to ask her about it but I'm not at all sure how I should go about it. Any tips?

Thanks in advance!


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What Guys Said 2

  • Just text her that when she has free time you would like to hang out with her for drinks or dinner. If she is interested she will make time to see you. If she doesn't right away she might be shy or not interested.

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    • Thanks for the reply. I just want to be more sure than usual since we work together and I don't want to risk her not saying "Yes" and things being awkward. Any other girl, I'd just ask already because I don't care if they say "Yes" or "No".

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    • True. I guess there are very few ways to ask out a co-worker without the potential for some awkwardness. I guess it's also true that she wouldn't have given me her number if she were not somewhat interested. Thanks again!

    • Your very welcome. I hope with time something can develop from this. I can see and understand why your being more cautious. I probably would be cautious to. She seems to like to go out a lot and that makes it tough to because she seems to have a busy social life.

  • A) Ease up and see what she does. Don't avoid her, just don't go out of your way. If she keeps the distance, then it's nothing. If she comes to you, it's something.

    B) Direct route. Ask her out. If she says anything other than, "Not interested" and says she's busy or something, revert to A.

    And if something starts up, either both of you have to keep it a damn good secret around the office, or tell your bosses right away.

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    • Thanks for responding! I am in the process of easing up now but I'm fairly certain she will not begin to pursue me since I've heard from other co-workers that she's a worrier. Although, perhaps she's in the same boat as me since her friend did specify "If you didn't work together".

      I think we'll go the secret route, haha. Just people people tend to gossip or try to pry into your business where I work.

      Thanks again for your suggestions!

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