No guy has ever shown interest in me... why?

I'm a 28 year old girl, and throughout my entire life, I've never had a boyfriend and never been on a date. The problem is I've never had any guy ask me out or show interest in me. It's starting to make me very depressed and i will see a psychologist about this soon.

I am a decent looking girl. I'm thin, and Im in good shape. Im not very social though, but I so go out to stores, and some social events at times.

I'm just afraid I will end up alone and never knowing what its like to have a boyfriend. what could I be doing wrong in my life? are there girls out there like me I wonder...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You're probably not the best person to judge this, but are you approachable?

    How about initiating conversation with strangers? Can you approach someone you don't know and start up a casual conversation, even if it requires you to go way outside your comfort zone?

    What about online dating? Have you tried that?

    I like your idea about seeing a therapist about this, it's probably an investment worth making, though don't be afraid to take some chances on your own.

    Do you have any friends who might be able to set you up on a date?

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    • Im kind of socially awkward. Guys probably get creeped out when I talk to them, because I think I might have ADD or something. I think I look approachable though.

      I dont initiate conversations with strangers, but will it help me be more approachable?

    • Well, it might help you be less socially awkward if you get comfortable approaching new people and striking up conversations for example. You can practice even with people / guys you aren't interested in... Someone's waiting in line behind you, make a funny comment about how the other lines are all moving faster all of a sudden, or comment on the weather, or any other little thing that would be a universally common subject. Doesn't have to be a long conversation, just a line or two back and fourth would be good practice.
      Ask the cashier how his/her day is going, see if they've got a long way to go before they're off of work or if they're about to be done for the day. Ask if they prefer when it's busy or quiet, or something like that.
      Getting comfortable in those interactions might help you to be more approachable...
      Oh, and smile a lot. Practice smiling. Smile at people, work on making brief eye contact and smiling. Not creepy, stalker sort of eye contact though...

Most Helpful Girl

  • if you're not very social, that could be the problem. talk to lots of people, have lots of friends, have fun and meet new people all the time, be active. you will surely get noticed.

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What Guys Said 21

  • 1) Before asking such questions.. you should remember to post photos. Saying "I am decent looking." "people tell me i look pretty" does not work in your favour. Everyone thinks they look good. It is not possible

    2) Why didn't you ever ask anyone out? It's a great mistake on your part

    3) Ever tried to ask people about what kind of vibe you give off? To men especially? We dont approach a girl which gives of a "fuck off" vibe. There's a chance of getting rejected by every girl we approach.. but if we feel that we'll be sureshot rejected, we dont apprach.. waste of time and energy. On top of that humiliation.

    4) You might not be having male friends. Guys generally dont apprach girls who always stay in a girl only group. I personally see them as typical girly- gossiping girl

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    • Sorry I shoulda posted a picture... but Im too afraid to ask a guy out, rejection is my biggest fear in life. Guys should be approaching me, I put in effort into my looks. Maybe I do give off a bad vibe, and its preventing me from even having guy friends too.

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    • But guys are the ones who ask out, at least thats what my mom always told me. I take care of myself and my looks so I should be having at least a few guys flocking around me but its never happened

    • "that's what my mom told me" - exactly. That does not mean it's how the world works. at least not in the 21st century.

      " i should be having a few guys flocking around" - due to feminism, women have become more independent. Looks now dont matter as much as it did during your mom's time. Guys now have lot more options. If he knows a girl who looks somewhat like you but more career oriented, he'll go for her.

      I suggest you stop listening to your mom and start listening to your friends who are successfully dating. Your mom is giving you the right advice but for the wrong time. It would work in the 20th century- not now. Thank feminism for increasing competition

  • Maybe you seem a bit conservative, or give off that vibe, which prevents guys from approaching you. Also, do consider approaching guys you like yourself. It's no longer a taboo today, for girls to make the first move.

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    • Im afraid of rejection though. Should I dress more revealing and go out to a bar and see what happens? I've never tried that, and I'm kinda desperate at this point

    • if you want to have a one night stand go for it but if you're looking for something meaningful thats not the route to go.

    • It's not about your clothing. It's about your behavior.

  • 1) - Identify what kind of things you like in life, passions, hobbies, cultural or sports activities etc.
    2) - Insert yourself in the middle of people that share the same passions. Start somewhere, internet and local community.
    3) - Develop your social skills with them, they will be more acessible and you can actually make important things for you happen.
    4) - Friendships can grow, you will get all types of people, so some may hurt you, and other's make you feel wonderfull. Prepare for that.
    5) - Expan yourself out of that zone and learn about love.

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  • No. 1 quite being afraid because there is nothing to be afraid of. What rejection... big deal! Life is full of rejection.

    You have to be more assertive... guys like it! If you are funny let it shine through... making a guy laugh is always an attractive quality!

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  • You said you're not very sociable, maybe that's the issue here, go out to more social places, meet more guys, and also TALK to guys that you like too! But be yourself don't dress more revealing either.

    I'm curious as to what you look like though haha xD

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  • Open your mouth and go and talk to a guy. Guys used to approach women all the time until they started getting called stalkers and perverts by the lesbian branch of the feminist movement. Now they don't bother. Blame your crazy sisters, the bra burners. They're ruining it for everybody

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    • My mom always told me that guys should always approach the girl. doesn't that still happen? I hope guys dont see me as some crazy feminist

    • No it was fine guys approaching girls. Men never bothered, neither did the girls. Young guys don't have the confidence to do it anymore coz of those crazy bitches and their man hating rhetoric. It's ruined it for both sexes. A few hateful bitches is all it takes eh.

  • Literally sign onto any online social dating site. Your problem will be fixed within an hour. I recommend POF. com

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  • It's a little odd that your account name is "simplerave12" and you have difficulty finding men. You should have tons of interest at a rave.

    Otherwise... it is hard to say. You provided no information that anyone can use to work with.

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  • Well, I would be your boyfriend, but I know nothing about you except the stuff you wrote here. I got abused by gold diggers and attention whores in the past seven months. I don't really want to go for online relationships anymore. I definitely never want to see prostitutes again.

    What exactly are you looking for in a guy? Write out what you're looking for in a guy (try to think of positive things), that'll make it easier for you to find the guy you're looking for... Peace.

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  • join in with groups and go to places. make friends to start out with and then maybe you will get a special friend.

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  • You can just chat with guys & make friends. Don't feel like that there a lot of who like you so much.

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  • You have to take showers regularly and brush your hair

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  • Are u cute?

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  • Maybe you're just ugly.

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    • I dont think I am, I mean Im skinny, I go to the gym, and I have good sized boobs. Should I dress more revealing?

    • Hell no, you don't wanna be looked at like you're an easy a, do you?

  • Try online dating.

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  • i find it more shocking to hear of women being single this long compared to a guy, mainly because women don't have to approach and be the initiators

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  • I can't send you a PM...

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  • I can, sadly, totally relate.

    As a guy I have it even worse, since I'm the one that's supposed to approach! But I'm extremely shy and would be absolutely terrible about it... so I don't approach; sad I know

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  • I can sort of relate to you

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  • Most guys have probably never hit on a girl in a store. What kind of 'social events' do you go to, and how often, and do you talk to strangers?

    Do you smile?

    Do you make eye contact?

    Most guys approach the woman. Most often the woman has given him signs of interest before approaching.

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  • I feel for you, I am in the same boat madam :(

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What Girls Said 5

  • I've never had a boyfriend and I'm 18, but I'm glad to say that the reason is because of isolation and racism. I lived in a rural town of racists, I'm half-Filipino and you can tell just by looking at my that I'm half white. Cleft chin, slightly longer nose, and brown hair. A lot of guys liked me, but nobody wanted to date a Hybrid like me. I'm glad coz The guys in my town are notorious womanisers and tend to impregnate girls as soon as their pants are down.

    I've moved out of the town and went abroad. Now I homeschool and am a total introvert, I don't like going outside being or being near too many people. But I notice that I do attract some attention, but they never seem to be guys my own age. It's usually middle aged men or guys ten something years older than me. I think it might be because of my Asian-looks. But I think girls like us, single ladies I mean, need to get out there. Seriously, I'm currently working on my "flirting skills".

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    • Yes maybe I should try and flirt. How do I do that though. Im white and have a good figure but I think it's my facial expression that's the problem. I look mad all the time but I dont mean too 😔

    • Holy hamster! Me too! Everybody says I look like I want to kill people, I've got intensely intimidating eyebrows! But yeah I don't know how to sort that out... but maybe do whatever girls do to smarten up their face. I hate wearing makeup, I just use BB cream and get rid of unwanted facial hair. My eyebrows will always be thick and angry looking, if you find the right guy he'll ignore your angry look. I'm no love guru, I'm basically in your shoes. Single, unsociable, and intimidating looking.

  • Sounds like you have some anxiety. I would talk to someone about that and work on getti mg out of your comfort zone. You will not be alone forever. 💕

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  • Literally same girl ! I've never had a boyfriend either and it sucks really 😭 but i promise you you're gonna find that special guy someday! try to be happy with being single for now

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    • Yeah it's terrible 😥 I've waited this long but I should be patient. Thanks, I just need to find a guy soon before its too late

  • Hey. The same thing happens to me. I'm sure your a beautiful person. They will come. Because I've seen really ugly people get others as well. Some are desperate. While you are wise. Waiting for the right one

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    • Thanks ☺️ I'm just worried because not one guy has come to me, but maybe patience is key

  • Think of a single guy in your life who you may be interested in. Ask him out on a date, swallow your pride. Maybe ask a couple guys out for coffee or to hangout.

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