My partner and I have been dating for 8 months. We both are models and a lot of things that come with that make me very uncomfortable. (I'm 17 and she is 15 by the way.)
Other girls putting their hands all over her.
Guys constantly throwing themselves at her.
Her consistently wanting to post provocative pictures.
Constantly wearing clothing that lets everything hang out.
I'm not okay with any of these, so I don't do them and luckily nobody throws themself at me.
But there were things that I did that she didn't like too. Like she didn't want people seeing me in a tank top, wearing earrings or wearing certain types of underwear under my clothing. So I stopped doing those things. But when I ask her not to do something it usually spawns a fight.
She has low confidence so modeling and doing all these things make her feel good. But they are a big red flag for me. I have brought up breaking up multiple times but each time she strongly disagrees and we seemingly resolve everything.
But it's led to competition, at least on my behalf. I now feel so competitive with her and get upset when things happen to her that don't happen to me. (Pretty childish right?)
But the bottom line is these things happen daily and I'm not happy any more. I haven't fallen out of love with her, but 5 out of 7 nights a week I lose sleep over this. I can't make myself okay with it and I can't change who she is, nor would I want to. I wanted to seek counseling but she doesn't want to and we don't really have money.
Is it time to end things or is there another solution?
- Yes, you should look into ending things.Vote A
- No stick with it, things will change as you get older.Vote B
- OtherVote C
- Unsure/see results.Vote D
Most Helpful Girl
She's being a hypocrite and is generally making your life miserable.
I totally understand your concern over her taking provocative photos to post for strangers to look at. Or dressing in a way where everything is hanging out. She's a bloody child still, 15 years old. I'm sure she can't help other people being attracted to her, but she's obviously fuelling the ogling by dressing in a revealing way and knows it.
Competition or not, she's being unfair to you and whenever you bring up her behaviour, she bitches her way out if it and doesn't even want to consider the fact that you've stopped doing certain things because she asked while she completely refuses to reciprocate.
You sound very mature and level headed. You don't need such bullshit in your life.2
Most Helpful Guy
Whenever there's a setup like "she acts jealous and demands me to do things but if I say anything she just gets offended and picks a verbal fight with nothing resolved", I think that relationship just doesn't involve mature enough people to be able to sustain itself.3