On-line dating... Is this a RED FLAG?

I have been texting a guy from on-line for several weeks. We have been planning to meet up when I move to his area. A few days prior to me driving the 16hours for the move I tell him I'm driving down on Friday, Saturday I'm spending with my family/recovering and Sunday is all for him. He responds "Wow, you really know how to make a guy feel special." So I drive down Friday and reach my destination it is midnight and he tells me "You should drive the extra 45mns to see me." I'm like no, I'm exhausted and sore. So he says "tomorrow is the day" I say no, I'm spending time with family and recovering from drive." So later that night he again presures me to see him, I'm starting to get annoyed and then he texts "Sorry, I'm just excited to see you, we have been texting over a month." Then a few mins later... "I'm good though, we don't need to see eachother tomorrow." Then follows up with "Wish you were here." So I say nothing, and then Sunday he texts me "Good morning! I'm so sun burnt from yesterday." I havn't responded as I am confused as to what happened. Was he being selfish/disrespectful or am I making too big a deal here?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think he sounds like a fucking stupid, unreasonable moron, he's exhibiting signs of being a little bitch already... usually people wait till they feel like they've got you before you see their true, needy little colors. Do what you want, women are typically quite forgiving and give guys chances, but I think carrying on with him will bite you in the ass.

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    • Thank you, I appreciate your opinion, and agree. It was such a turn off I didn't even want to see him anymore :/ Like, I was on the road since 8am until midnight and you think it's ok to pressure me to see you for the first time? Wtf lol

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    • Big up, thanks for mho!

    • Welcome sir ;)

Most Helpful Girl

  • No he was definitely being selfish and inconsiderate. While I understand he was excited, that shouldn't mean he's allowed to totally disregard your feelings and well being for the sake of getting what he wants faster. Relationships require consideration and patience and you'd be doing right to tell him that.

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    • Personally, I wouldn't see this guy ever. He sounds like a prick.

    • yeah, after his inconsiderate display... I am soo turned off I don't want to

What Guys Said 5

  • Sounds a little clingy to me. I mean, the date was already set and he had an entire day to himself and was still pining. make sure you meet this guy in a public place...

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  • i like a girl i met on " meet me " but i think online dating is bullshit. but who knows BE CAREFUL.

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  • its not a red flag but it could be i can understand his excitement and it was a little rude but you should overlook it for now but not forget

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    • Ok, but you waited like 5-6 weeks you can't wait another 24 hours? Come one? Sounds fishy to me?

    • its not fishy its just brimming with anticipation. also its not like he didn't want to see you the whole time during those weeks.

    • Yes, I get it... but he could have waited one more day. Why would I want to meet a guy fro the first time when I am just drained on all levels? I would be bitchy/crabby out of it. My point is, what couldn't he just wait one more day? Not a week, a day.

  • He never mentioned coming to see you? Anyways, he Maybe just trying to carry on a conversation. He may be excited to see you, but you've been aloft. The may be sunburned. Was. He asking you to take care of him?

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  • Don't make such a big deal. Just go see him.

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What Girls Said 6

  • Online dating can be or not a red flag.. I am currently in one and its not a red flag THANKFULLY 😌 now I understand that he can be exited but I think he SHOULD BE mature enough to understand that you are exhausted and that you already have plans that he should respect! His texts were... Childish and maybe immature... He should give you some space and tell you to have a good rest... Not text u in a way saying YOU MUST SEE ME NOW, SHAME ON YOU IF YOU DONT 😆 so I think that was a complete turn, off... If he is doing this from now ( in the stage that both sides should be trying to show the best thing in their personality) , then what the hell will he do after a few months later 😶

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    • by the way I just read your comment that you said you guys didn't video chat... Thats not a good sign 😶 before you meet him be sure he is who he is... If u don't want to video chat OR you don't know how to ask him for it coz he might say " lets just meet " then let him send a video of HIMSELF saying or doing whatever, but before you go, be sure who you are expecting to meet up with! And take a friend or someone with you just in case!

  • Just meet in a public places for your safety.

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  • Major question, have you ever video chatted? Also, always go with someone to meet a person you met online. it's may kill the mood a bit but better safe than sorry. Online dating can be tricky, although I am in a long lasting relationship because of it, you have to be careful. Do your best to confirm he is who he's saying he is, its not crazy it's simply about keeping yourself safe. If he flips about you wanting to video chat or bring a friend that's a huge red flag. Stay safe! 😘

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    • You are right... His behavior def changed from the guy I was getting to know... for some reason when I finally got to the area he did like a 180 with the pressuring... we never did video chat, just sent a lot of pics of our lives... dogs, etc..

  • Definitely, trust your instincts

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  • He seemed very excited but inconsiderate at the same time. You shouldn't have to drive the extra 45 minutes after driving that long, make him come to you.

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  • Why are you upset about the sunburn comment? Why assume he's canceling? It sounds like he's just making conversation. Did he say "I can't see you cuz I'm sunburned"?

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    • Yeah, it sounded like an excuse... From his previous comments of trying so hard to see me before Sunday, and then he says that.

    • So what did you do yesterday?

    • Rested

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