Long distance relationship could work?

During a business trip last year in France, I matched with a guy on Tinder but was too busy with work, I didn't meet him. We continued talking over whatsapp & Skype since June, at least 3-4 times a week, sometimes everyday.

I decided to travel around Europe for 3 weeks (just returned from my trip today actually). On my second day in Paris, he came to meet me, he's based in Bordeaux. We clicked so well and it felt natural as we have been talking for so long. I went to Barcelona for a week and when i returned, he got me the tickets to Bordeaux and asked me to come see him. It was a short weekend but a brilliant one. I then spent a week with him in Bordeaux as i had some businesses there. It was really sad to leave and go home. He asked me if i would move to France to live but I don't speak the language and it would mean i wouldn't be able to find a job similar to what i have now (i'm a marketing director for a wine importer/distributor in Vietnam). He also has a good job in France which he's not willing to give up. I know it's quite silly to ask him to move for me considering we just met in person a few weeks ago. I really like him and feel there's a sparkle between us.
Currently I'm still deciding on where to move to as I don't really fit in well in Vietnam. I was born abroad and lived abroad most of my life, returned to Vietnam 4 years ago because my parents wanted me to take over the family business (which i don't like). It would be better for me to move to an English-speaking country as my French is very basic.

What would you do if you were in my situation? I was in a long distance relationship before but it ended as my ex wanted to move to Brazil and i didn't want to go there. Would it be better to just stop all communications with him and get on with life? It would be painful to stay friends after all that great time we spent together.

Thank you for reading all that, looking forward to your advice :)


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's a tough call. It seems like the chemistry and connection was their. It just sucks because you both can't relocate to each other areas. Long distance can work if both people want it to work. But it is tough and hard. It's so many obstacles that can stand in the way. Relocating is one. But you and him could still visit each other.

    • That's what he said, about visiting each other. He plans to visit me this summer in Vietnam or we could meet in New York as he will be travelling there for work and i could come for a short holiday (though costly). I honestly think it will be very difficult as i need the constant attention and contact over phone/skype will not be enough for me. I'm just debating now whether just to cut all communications to avoid being hurt later on, because of the distance.

    • Show All
    • Your advice was really helpful :).

      I talked to him more and we discussed about being exclusive. He will come to visit me in June then we will see from there if it can work.

      Thank you again ;)

    • Your very welcome. ☺

      That is very good that you guys will become exclusive. I am glad that he will visit you soon. I think that is fair since you visited him. I really hope it works out. And I'm very glad you and him are trying to work things out. ☺

What Guys Said 1

What Girls Said 2

  • It can work if one is willing to move to be with the other person. But it's hard since you can't spend time with your SO and you guys have no physical contact for a long time.
    You miss the person, sometimes you don't know what's going on with them or if they're OK. It's really hard and painful.

    But if both are committed, put an effort on it and really like each other, then I guess the relationship can work.

    • We communicate a lot via phone/skype but it's extremely difficult considering the distance. Seeing each other once or twice a year wouldn't cut it :(

    • I see.
      Well, if you guys communicate a lot via phone or Skype, that's a good sign. In a LDR communication is one of the most important things and can avoid a lot of problems.
      But I get you, sometimes it's hard to ignore the distance...
      At the same time, I believe that a relationship like this can be successful, even if it takes a couple of years before the couple get together.

  • LDR are difficult!