Do girls expect a guy to pay for dinner on the first date?

My date was offended the other night when I asked her if she wanted to split the bill when the check came. Do all girls expect the guy to pick up the check on a first date?

  • Yes - A guy should always pick up the check on the first date
    49% (27)50% (12)49% (39)Vote
  • No - Girls don't expect a guy to pay for dinner on the first date
    51% (28)50% (12)51% (40)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it depends. For me personally, whether or not it was a date or an outing with a friend, if there wasn't some kind of agreement that you would both be paying for your own meals/splitting the bill, etc. then I expect the person who asked to pick up the bill. Because maybe the other person can't really afford it and if they had been aware from the get go that they would be paying they would have said no.

    It's not like I just expect guys to buy my meals for me, I just expect everyone to follow that, including myself. If I ask a friend out to eat, or for coffee, etc, I pay, unless we already have a different understanding (like habitually go for coffee and we each pay for our own). Where there is no precedent date or outing, the terms for paying should be set out beforehand and it's on the person asking to make sure those terms are clear, or else it's perfectly fair for the other person to assume that you're picking up the tab.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Unfortunately a lot of women do. I've done it before several times, but honestly I've never got passed a 2nd date with any of them (not correlating them or anything.)

    But you know, don't ever spend money on a woman unless you are 110% sure you want to be with her.

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What Girls Said 26

  • If she's a traditional girl... or a normal human being... she'll expect you to pay or at least offer/fight her on splitting.

    The way I figure is if you asked, you pay.

    I asked my boyfriend on our first date. Ergo I paid on our first date. But if you asked me out I'd expect you to pay, yes.

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  • I don't expect it because dicks don't shoot money.

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  • my boyfriend and i planned our first date together, ergo we both came fully prepared to pay for ourselves... i let him buy me a drink when he offered, but i insisted on paying for my own dinner.

    now that we've been together for over a year, we take turns paying for dates and nights out. if he buys dinner, i pay for the movie, or something to that effect.

    i can see a traditional woman being offended if a guy asked her to split the bill. that said, if she's that easily offended, then you need to consider if she's someone you want to date.

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  • I wouldn't expect anything from a guy on a first date. I'd assume we were spilitting the bill. If he insisted he should pay then I'd insist that I'd pay the next time. I would never want a guy under the assumption I was dating him for financial gain. If I had no intention of seeing him again then I'd certainly pay for my half.

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  • You know I couldn't answer your poll. I dont believe in A, that a guy should pay, in fact on my first date with my boyfriend we went to the movies and he bought my ticket and soda after I told him I was doing something else so he wouldn't pay for it and I cried because it was so nice. And B Yes, MOST girls do expect guys to pay for every meal. That is not how its done between us, its usually based on whoever has more money at the time, who just got paid, or if its a really fancy place we split it (Unless a special occasion and he's feeling generous) and also we do the whoevers idea it was to go out pays when we can't decide who pays.

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  • Do I expect it? Yeah I'm quite traditional when it comes to this.
    Do I want him to pay? No I don't want to feel like owe him something and that I need to repay him somehow.
    So in a perfect situation he would ask to pay and I will refuse, he will insist butI would pay for myself

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  • Yes. It shows the woman that the man is a gentleman, respectful, that he values her and her time, that he appreciates her accepting the invitation to go on a date, and that he is caring. I've never had a man do that, but I would not go on a second date with any man that did. It tells a girl a lot about a man's character honestly. So maybe stop doing that. Reserve the bill splitting for when the relationship progresses. On the first date is kind of a red flag

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    • If that's the case then a woman expecting the guy to pay shows that she's selfish and not willing to put equal effort. If you think a guy paying half shows a bad sign then that's sad.

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    • I believe a woman should put equal effort. If she leaves a guy for not paying for the first date then she is has quite the entitlement complex. I don't get caught up in gender. I don't believe a guy should have to do more at the start since he's a guy and that she should put less effort because she's a woman. They both are people who are interested so put equal effort. Don't expect them act a certain because of their gender.

    • @ihatethiswebsite
      Because everyone is so sensitive and butt hurt now and we all have to act like we're unisex. Have fun with that, I live in the real world. And nothing is selfish about being old fashioned when it comes to wanting a guy to be a gentleman and giving just like im a lady and giving. You and I just disagree with who pays on one date. It has nothing to do with the rest of the relationship or subsequent dates. I said splitting things is good and bormal, just not on the first date. And if you're so determined to keep tabs like that, I've also taken care of the whole bill many many many times. Just not in the first date.

  • My rule is: the one who invites is the one to pay.

    If I ask him out (which I have), paying is my responsibility.
    If he asks me out, it's his responsibility.
    BUT even so, I'd still offer to split the bill. I usually go for broke guys, and I'm not saying they're "cheap" because they didn't pay. Literally unemployed or working few hours.

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  • Well at least for the very first time, yeah i think most girls would love to see their man pay up :)

    splitting sure works too from 2nd 3rd date and so on.

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  • It's traditional. I think the person asking the other out should be willing to pay whether it's the guy or the girl who asked the guy out! (We can ask guys out, can't we!!)

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  • My first date... i paid for us! but he really fought me on it though! didn't help that he was from Russia and had a firm belief that men should pay! cuz if they didn't that means they have "no balls!" his words not mine. But i won of course :)
    take care

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  • I like to go Dutch. I don't like the idea of being bought. But many guys insist. Sometimes they say you get it next time which is awkward if I don't wanna see them again. One time I paid whilst this guy was in the bathroom and he said I was emasculating him.

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  • If it's a real first date, the person who asks out the other person pays.

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  • I think traditionally if you asked the female out you should pick up the first date and if you werent planning on that i think you should make that clear so there won't be any confusion.

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  • I'm fine with splitting the bill.

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  • If he invited me he should pay for the first date yes. I would always offer to pay my own way though.

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  • i used to think that they should because i was young. now I don't mind

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  • i can't say for all girls but every single time im going to insist that i me pay for it

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  • Did he ask me? than yes but id still offer. If I did , id pay.

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  • I don't. lol I'm too independent for that.

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  • Go half half

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  • I'd split it or pay for my own everytime

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  • It depends on the girl, many would prefer to split it... GENDER EQUALITY!

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  • I like the idea that whoever asked the other to go out should pay. That way it's fair. :P

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  • I expect guy to pay always when we go out

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  • If he chose the place and its expensive then yes. If its the first date and he asked me out then yes. I would expect it when its my birthday too and valentines. Maybe anniversary too or if he surprised me.

    Everything in between I would expect halfies. And I would pay on his birthday or if I asked him out/ took him somewhere/ surpised him.

    However, If i know this guy is poor then i will offer to split as long as i have the money because I too am very poor.

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What Guys Said 15

  • Alright man... this depends on circumstances. If you already met, hit it off, banged this girl previously, etc. and then you asked her out, then the check is on you. However, if this was a first time tinder date or something and you aren't feeling it... then make her pay half, nothing wrong with that.

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  • Some do, some don't, every girl is different. If both are equally well off AND the guy don't want to pay; spitting is more appropriate. Since u two have different value, then a second date is prolly not a good idea. She prolly wouldn't be down for it to.

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  • That's why I don't do wine'n'dine. I eat to survive not for recreation purposes. Yes, it makes sense you would pay or argue against her paying. On othe other hand, I wouldn't care, I'm not going to suck up to a woman just because she's a woman, no matter who she is.

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  • It's odd because I personally think you should offer to pay, but she should offer to pay her own part first. So if she EXPECTS to be paid for BECAUSE she is female, then she isn't really worth dating in my opinion.

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  • Most girls expect it, but you don't have to do it, and you shouldn't do it.

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  • Depends on the girl but y not? Ur a confident, charming, smart, & hard-working young man. The way i think bout myself by the way so if it doesn't work out at least i only spent a little over $20 on her onto the next one lol

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  • Be the man already and pay, and damn the costs you're on a date, make sure she has a good time treat her right

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  • Im - maybe - old fashioned, but man should pay it always. Not only for the 1st time.

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  • Man if you asked to take her on a date you pay for it lmao, it's common sense. If she asks you then you split it. ratt

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  • i dont think they do tbh

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  • I always go for 50/50.

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  • I either pay or spilt it they usually expect it

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  • I always try to pay for dates because it seems more right lol

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  • The current arrangement is that whoever asked the other one out offers to pay it and then the other person objects once to be polite. The first person insists at which point person two decides if he/she wants to be cheap about it or not.

    But yes, if you asked her out, be ready to pay for two.
    If she asked you out... Be ready to pay for two. Just, if you have to, that's really poor manners on her part.

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  • She did you a favour and showed you that she wants more from you than she will offer in the relationship. Throw her to the curb.

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    • Really? I like a guy to pay for dinner. It shows that he really likes me and enjoys my company, and is clearly giving me the signal that yes, I want to date you. Friends split the bill, but a guy who is serious about a girl will pay for the date because he wants to treat her special. Although, if he pays, I will try to find a way to slip money to him discretely for my half. E. g. Leave it on the floor of his car, slip it into his pocket, etc.

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    • @Poppykate the only way to truly tell is his actions over time. If he keeps wanting to date, if he seems to enjoy himself with you, if he is ok without you sleeping with him right away; enough of these and you'll know. A real good sign is if he remembers little things about you, you mention in passing. In the end though, there seems to be no sure sign for either sex.
      It would be so much easyier if our butts turned blue like monkeys!

    • Hahaha😂 I know right. I quick look at your bum during a date would quickly determine if he likes you and via versa.

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