Is it okay to like what you like and want what you want?

I'm not too picky when it comes to dating. But it's certainly things that I want. Every relationship I've been in I've settled for some things that I necessarily didn't like and I was treated very badly. I know people aren't perfect and im willing to compromise. But there's a few things I want for example. I would like a guy taller than me 5'10 and up, my age or older and doesn't have kids yet because I want to experience that beautiful moment in life together for the first time and I would like him to be attractive to me. I dont care if others don't find him hot I would just like him to be hot to me. Those are the physical things that I want of course I want respect and loyalty etc etc. But is that unrealistic to want these things in a man?


What Guys Said 1

  • They don't seem wildly unrealistic, though as you get older, the pool of mature, respectful, good looking guys who are older than you and never had kids but wants them, shrinks.

    You should never settle for being treated badly.

    In retrospect, how the person treats you is a lot more important than some of the other things we focus on, but you do need to find them generally attractive.

    • That's true. I just don't think I'm ready to be a mom like figure to someone else's kids and I don't have my own yet. And I just want to share that moment with someone and it be our first time together. I know that pool shrinks as I get older but I'm going to stay hopeful. I'm 24 now so I'm staying hopeful that I meet someone my age or older. =)

    • Show All
    • I don't know. ask other women your age, haha.

      While i often here people here telling teenage girls that guys will be more interested in relationships when they're older, that didn't match my experience. Most guys i knew in their teens wanted a girlfriend. By mid 20's more of them were jaded, plus the dating market was starting to swing in their favor, and they were much more likely to have adopted a 'start casual and we'll see' attitude. Unfortunately, men are better served by starting with sex then adding commitment nowadays, and as they get older, if they have options, they figure that out.

      In any case, make sure you're up front about what you're looking for. It only drives away guys with no interest in a relationship.

    • Yea I'm not giving anything away casually. If someone wants what's in my pants then they'll have to show some type of commitment. The market quality has went down. I consider myself to have a high market value. I'm staying positive that there's a real man out there somewhere =) thank you for your input.

What Girls Said 1

  • It's fine. Don't settle, it will make you miserable.