How do guys feel about dating young, independent single moms?

I'm 22 and a single Mother of a 4 year old little boy who is my entire world! I haven't been in a long term relationship since his father which ended 3 years ago. It's been so hard to find someone who truly accepts the situation. Not only am I Mother but I'm also finished college and starting my career so I am a very driven, determined, goal-oriented and independent. I work, I'm on my own, I have bills to pay etc, I have my stuff together. Why is it so hard to find someone who can accept this and is willing to date someone who is already a mom and getting her life on track? Do guys find this too intimidating? I would really like to get some sort of an idea of what guys think of this!


Most Helpful Guy

  • As a guy married to a younger lady who has two children already from her ex-ass-husband I can say to you that there are those of us out there that do not have an issue with a woman that has kids. I find it refreshing to see a single mom working her ass off to make a good life for her child and better herself. It speaks volumes about the type of person she is and the type of maturity that she has a grip on. I've seen a lot of younger woman who spend their time bitching about not being happy and having to work etc. They are out of touch with the real world.You're 22 and already have the level of maturity of that of a 30 year old. Your son will be a man someday because of what you are doing now. Try and find someone that's a little older. Older meaning they aren't looking to party and acting like a teenager still. Look for a "man" and not a "boy". Not making fun in anyway but very much believe that someone in your situation needs maturity and someone that will also love your little boy because he's a part of you and they love you. It's hard because time in the day is short with all that's going on. But we're out there...don't give up.


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What Guys Said 3

  • It's not that we are intimidated. We are afraid of baggage. Not baggage of your son, but the baggage that there might be another man involved. No one wants to enter a relationship being caught in a triangle love affair. If you can show that you have moved on and don't share any type of relationship with your child's father then a guy might want to talk to you.

  • I wouldn't have a problem with the girl or with her child, but I might expect the child's dad to become my problem sooner or later.

    • The father has never been an issue in my dating life unless they hurt my son or I in any way which is how it should be.

  • Its a package deal, a guy has to establish and maintain a relationship with you and your child. Kids can act weird or hostile, been in that situation, its a drag, I avoid the situation. Its like an instant family and you have to take on a pseudo parental role. If the relationship progresses and you get married at least where I live you will become finacially responsible for the child if you get divorced you pay child support. Parenting is a social reality not a biological one.

    Single mothers have a habit of geting accidentally pregnant to keep the guy around or just to garantee child support if he doesnt... it happens higher risk... I know so many women who have done this...

    Would be easier if the guy had kids already and could relate to raising children and the repsonsiblity that goes with it. It reduces your social freedom can't go out and party on the weekend and sleep in till mid day etc, traveling holidays etc if affect all aspects of your life..

    Having said that I know a lot of guys who date single mothers because they find it so hard to date...


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