4 years ago I was 206lbs and my crush and I were good friends and I asked him out and he said I was a nice girl but he wasn't interested and so about 2 years ago I started losing weight and have lost 100lbs and he saw me on social media and we've been messaging and now he wants to date. My girlfriends say I shouldn't date him (insert 'Marilyn Monroe' quote), but I talked to one of my guy friends about it and he told me everyone has a preference whether race, height, weight etc and that he's probably not a bad person and to give him a chance.
Is it a bad sign that he rejected me before when I was bigger?
Most Helpful Guy
Congrats on your weight loss.
This is not surprising.
It's also not surprising if it bothers you. Most of us are totally neurotic about 'why' people like us. Like on some level we think they should be madly in love with us and super attracted to us based on just us being super special snowflakes. They shouldn't care about anything we do. If they like us because we're nice, we're like 'oh so if i didn't do nice things for you, you wouldn't like me'. If they like our bodies, they just see us as sex objects, if they like our accomplishments, they only like us for that. It's basically nuts. You know who loves us just for who we are? Hopefully our parents.
Would my wife be with me if i were dumb and short? Probably not. It's how it goes.
206 lbs vs. 106 lbs is a huge difference. Huge. It's not at all surprising it would shift someone's view on whether they'd date you. Maybe it bothers you too much, and someone new, you can pretend they would have dated you anyway.
But i'd give it a shot. He was always polite, you always got along, and now he finds you hot as well.
Enjoy your new body.0
Most Helpful Girl
I dont think he is a bad person
And it is natural that hed feel more physically attracted to you now. He clearly already liked your personality, since you were friends.
And if he wasn't rude or hurtful in what he said when he rejected you the 1st time, then why not give it a chance?
Anyone that says he is being shallow is a hypocrite. Even if you like someone's personality a lot, you also have to have the least bit of attraction towards their physique, in order to be romantically involved.1
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